Bachelorette vent

LoveActually4

My friend is planning a bachelorette for another friend and it's out of control.

She's planning a weekend away at a cottage. She asked if I would be coming and I said I was stopping by for a few hours, but since I am still BFing and on mat leave I won't be staying the night because money is tight.

Tonight she sent out a msg on FB saying that the total for the weekend is 250. Everyone was really upset because this was much more than she has estimated. I sent her a message saying that I would like to help offset the cost and since I was spending an afternoon there, I would contribute 50 bucks to food, etc. that I would be consuming.

She wrote me back and said she had counted me in and I owe 250 bucks! She said either I'm taking part or not and of I'm stepping foot in the cottage then I should pay what everyone pays! To make matters worse, if I back out, now all of my other friends would have to pay more.

WWYD?

monkeybutt61612

I wouldn't even almost go or pay 250.  It sucks for everyone else, but I bet you aren't the only one who can't afford it. 

pandaglitter

Wow what a crazy person!! I would personally be very tempted to plan a cheaper party that would be more fun and get everyone to join...but that would be pretty immature. What on earth is the money going toward? I think it's ridiculous when so much money is demanded.

It sucks because you don't want to let the bride down, but its completely unfair to you as you're not even staying there and enjoying what the 250 is going toward. The mature thing at this point would probably be to just suck it up, since its for the bachelorette, but that really sucks.

pandaglitter

When is it??? Because I thought you said this weekend but if not, there's hopefully time to change plans to something everyone is happy with.

Runaway22

I agree that you should collectively confront the planner. Guilt would not force me to cough up $250. That's ridiculous.

amykins1283

What the heck happened to dinner, drinks, and maybe clubbing and/or strippers? Or a spa day? When did bachelor and bachelorette parties become days long events?

She is being ridiculous.

shannond354

Depending on the type of party they're having could you just send a bottle of champagne or wine with another friend who is going? I would send a sweet note with it saying that you're thinking about her and that you're sorry you can't be there.

$250 for an afternoon is ridiculous.  

MrsT0514

Yep, I'm in agreement with PPs, in that 250 bucks per person for a bachelorette party is just ludicrous. I wouldnt be paying/going at all if it were me in your shoes.

MrsSparklesMcGee

amykins1283:

What the heck happened to dinner, drinks, and maybe clubbing and/or strippers? Or a spa day? When did bachelor and bachelorette parties become days long events? She is being ridiculous.

QFT. I'd talk to the other ladies and come up with a plan to confront the planner. Assuming the bride is a good friend of yours, I'm sure she'd be disappointed if you couldn't participate because this other friend is crazycakes. 

jorkz821

That's crazy. I guess you can't go then, sorry crazy bachelorette party planning friend.

But yeah a note and small gift delivered there got the bride might be nice.

LoveActually4

ItsAllGravy7:

oh hell no. no 250 from me. thats just a stupid waste of booze money. ive done overnight bachelorettes often and even with dinner our nights werent 250. if everyone can afford it and wants to thats one thing but if you said money is tight i dont see why she would assume you were participating

this made me LOL. Sorry it wasn't about the show.

I told her no way and I happily and respectfully declined to the planner. The bride called me 30 mins later and said the planner told her what happened and to smarten the fcuk up an not make me pay a cent. I'll still contribute a bit but it might be awkward now!

Kitiara5512

Sounds like they are all already upset about the cost. She needs to make different plans, this time within everyone's budget unless she is footing the bill herself.

katlizabeth

ItsAllGravy7:

i really thought this was about the show which i hadn't watched yet bc it was on dvr. so i waited to open this post until after i watched and now im utterly disappointed : i promise to go back and read your post and leave some actual non self centered, non poor me feedback when i'm done wallowing.

this was me exactly, except I finished it this morning.  I was disappointed it wasn't about the show,

 

and no, don't pay $250 to set foot in the cottage.