Second-time mat. leave shorter?

eec129

Second time moms...did you take a shorter leave with your second child? I am debating doing this when the time comes but wondering if I'll regret it (thinking 8 instead of 12 weeks).

 

 

eec129

The reason I'm considering it is because I will be starting a new job in a week and when it comes time to tell, I want to seem as flexible as possible. Otherwise, I'd probably just stick with 12 weeks.

ashcody2

eec129:

Second time moms...did you take a shorter leave with your second child? I am debating doing this when the time comes but wondering if I'll regret it (thinking 8 instead of 12 weeks).

 

 

I only took 8 weeks but plan on taking the full 12 the 2nd time around! I work for an acct. firm and my timing wasn't the greatest haha! LO was born in January so I needed to come back early for the busy season.

mexicolombiana

With my 1st I took 6 weeks and thought it was fine.  But with my second I decided to take 12 weeks and it was the best decision EVER.  I always think about how I will probably NEVER be able to take such a long break from work again in my whole working career.  Whenever we take vacations we take them one measly week at a time.  So my thinking was to take ALL the time possible.  

Honestly though I didn't "need" more maternity leave my 2nd time around but it was so much more fun with both girls.  

tweety1290

I took 8 weeks with my first and 12 weeks with my second - I regretted not taking the full 12 weeks with my first so that's why I did longer for the second.

itsmevkb

I took 12 weeks with each baby.  I did, however, work part-time from home with my last three.  Doing so allowed me to be home 12 weeks and still come back with leave.  I really enjoyed it and believe I probably liked it more than I would have not working from home and returning at 8 weeks.

dragon_chica

Yes.  With DD I was out for 3 months only because I became a PT teacher so I was able to work with my partner teacher to take that extra time off and make it up when I returned.  With DS I didn't have that luxury since I returned to being FT and had very little sick days left.  I did the standard 6 weeks.  It was a lot less harder to go back the second time around since this was no longer my first rodeo so I knew how things would go.

mandy522

eec129:

The reason I'm considering it is because I will be starting a new job in a week and when it comes time to tell, I want to seem as flexible as possible. Otherwise, I'd probably just stick with 12 weeks.

Do you know for sure that you'll get paid leave? If the company relies on short term disability for paid leave (mine does) they typically won't cover you if you are already KO. My sister's company required that she be employed a year before taking paid mat. leave. I hope this isn't the case for you and you can take as much as you want!

emberlee3

I took 6 weeks with first and 10 weeks with second.

MrsWindyCity

I did. With DS1 I took 13 weeks and with DS2 I took about 10. Part of it was timing (DS1 was born on Good Friday, which I had off, so we were off to extra time off before my leave, and 4th of July fell at a good time where I already had that off, too, before returning) and part of it was that we continued sending (and therefore paying) for DS1 to attend school while I was home with DS2, an expense we didn't have the first time around. It was fine. It's always hard to go back, but I'm glad I got the "extra" pay.

Mrs.RockyM

 I felt it was harder to have quality time with DD2, especially since DD1 was especially needy when we first brought DD2 home. Weekends were really hard - I couldn't sleep when the baby slept because I had a 3.5 year old to take care of!  I actually looked forward to DD1 going to preschool so I could devote my 100% to DD2.  If you total up the time I had with DD1 when she was first born, compared to the time I had with DD2 - even though it was technically the same 12 weeks- I had less time with DD2.  If I had cut that time any shorter I think I would have regretted it.

 

skibunny59

I only have one right now but we are TTC #2.  I'm actually thinking about taking more time with #2.  I am a teacher and we can take up to a year unpaid.  I took 6 months with DD.  I would like to take at least 6 months if not more with the second baby.

Luckie519

DH and I both work at the same place, so we had to share time.  I had two weeks of bed rest, then was home for 7 weeks once DS was born (for a total of 9 weeks) and DH took 3 weeks.

We are hoping DH gets a new job.  He has been doing the application process for about 17 months and we are hoping he gets an offer soon.  If he does, I am taking all 12 weeks!!  I will have enough leave to be paid for 8 weeks, but we have some savings I can use to help us through.  Also, if DH gets this job, he will be making about $10,000 more a year, so that will help.

I would say if you can take the entire time, then take it!  You can't get that time back.

nawlinsgrl

My two main factors would be money (which you know in advance) and how baby is sleeping/doing overall.  In my case, I had planned ahead and saved up enough sick/vacation time to cover both pregnancies for 12 weeks.  With DD, I was really lucky in that she started STTN at 6.5 weeks, so I was pretty rested by around 8 weeks and went ahead and did a little work from home and went in for a couple hours here and there, which let me stretch out my leave a little more.

My standard answer to my boss both times has been "for the first month, you don't know my name," and that after that we can discuss my doing a little bit here and there until I come back, based on how I feel and how things are going at home.

That being said, I fully intend to take the full 12 weeks again, because as PP said, I doubt I'll ever be able to take this much time off from work at once again until I retire! 

Strunella

I took 13 weeks with DS.  I am now at a new company with generous maternity benefits, so I am going to take a longer leave with this baby.  Though I can take up to 6 months off, I'll likely limit my time to whatever is paid through both paid leave and vacation time.  I think that puts me at about 19 weeks.  Maybe take 1 week unpaid to make it an even 20 weeks. 

I'm of the mind that I have the rest of my life to work.  I only get one chance to be at home with my new baby so I'm going to take as much time off as is financially feasible.

Stephorse

I haven't negotiated my leave yet, but I'm starting a new job this time, and because my due date is in Feb which is not the best time of year for leaving (I'm a teacher) I will take only 6 weeks this time instead of 12 especially since a majority of it will probably not be paid this time.

AnnecyDream

I'm taking a longer leave with #2. 12 weeks this time, last time I only took 6, if that. I am self-employed and run my own business, so I really couldn't afford to step away for too long when DS was born. This time, I'm planning well in advance and have also socked away income replacement for 12 weeks in a savings account so that we don't struggle financially or have to cut DS's activities while I'm not working.

heyitsme

I had longer with #2 and I'm so glad I did. With DD I didn't have nursing issues, but with DS I did, and they only started getting resolved at 12 weeks, so I was glad I had 16 weeks off.

kcox123

I took 12 wks with #1 and 8 weeks with #2 & 3. It was fine. It's hard to go back no matter - and I love my work.

virginiagirl11

Dude, take the full time. As others have said, you'll never get this much time off again unless you have another kid. Plus, it's true infant sleep is so different from month to month. Plus, having two kids is WAY different than having one. I'm on ML now and I thank my lucky stars every day that I took 10 weeks off BC I am so friggin tired. I also value this bonding time with baby 2 in a huge way.

Do what you can to be a good new employee but do not give up that valuable maternity leave time! Take as much as you can.