Carrier Question??

Baby_Bunny_Hopeful

My brother and SIL are struggling TTC (multiple failed IVFs and miscarriages)... I feel helpless and am considering offering to be a gestational carrier.  Obviously, I want to give this A LOT of thought before even mentioning it to them.

My question is- I have two healthy boys- no miscarriages... but have had Gestational Diabetes with both pregnancies.  I was diet/exercise-controlled (no meds needed)

Would this rule me out as a potential carrier?

Note:  Both babies were large- my first was 8lb12oz and my second was 10lb5oz.

 TIA! 

Mama-Bear

Not sure if GD would rule you out, that would be up to both your OB and their RE.  Keep in mind, their IF struggles may not be a uterine issue, and if it is they may not want someone so close to them carrying for them.  I know many opt for friends/family to carry for them if someone offered, but my FIM didn't want her sister to carry for her, she wanted someone more "anonymous" (we knew one another about 6m before transfer, but we didn't know each other before matching), and I wouldn't want to carry for someone I was close with. Even if you didn't ask for any compensation, it can still be an extremely costly process costing them potentially tens of thousands of dollars in medical and legal costs. 

How does your DH feel about the idea?  Are you 100% finished having children?  How will you/your DH feel if you lose your fertility (it can and does happen). 

Baby_Bunny_Hopeful

Mama-Bear:

Not sure if GD would rule you out, that would be up to both your OB and their RE.  Keep in mind, their IF struggles may not be a uterine issue, and if it is they may not want someone so close to them carrying for them.  I know many opt for friends/family to carry for them if someone offered, but my FIM didn't want her sister to carry for her, she wanted someone more "anonymous" (we knew one another about 6m before transfer, but we didn't know each other before matching), and I wouldn't want to carry for someone I was close with. Even if you didn't ask for any compensation, it can still be an extremely costly process costing them potentially tens of thousands of dollars in medical and legal costs. 

How does your DH feel about the idea?  Are you 100% finished having children?  How will you/your DH feel if you lose your fertility (it can and does happen). 

You pose a lot of great questions... to which, I am glad that I posted since I hadn't thought about them.

 No, DH and I aren't 100% done having children.  Well- he would be if I wanted to be, but I want one more LO (in a few years, DS2 is under a year).  Basically, he is only OK with one more full-term pregnancy (whether it be ours or as a carrier).  I understand his concern as each pregnancy/labor is a major life event and can change our lives both positively and negatively.  Although, I have to admit, this has caused a bit of tension because I feel torn between offering the start of a family for my brother and his wife vs.completing our family.

 I don't even know how they feel about having a carrier... I believe it is a uterine issue since they did have some other issues that were medically resolved and she has since had blood tests and was taking daily shots to avoid clotting issues this last m/c pregnancy.  

They have kind of gone MIA the past year while struggling with IF, so I don't know ALL of the details (or their feelings on everything).