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lovemybabies1114
member
Should I feel bad...the whole story
lovemybabies1114
member
in Baby Names
Sorry I posted one similar to this, but I dont think I gave enough information about it. I posted a name I liked on another site and got no positive feedback on the name I listened to what the people were saying, but decided to stay with the name I had picked anyway so I posted again asking for middle name advice and no negative comments, but mainly all I got were negative comments and people being sarcastic and smart about the name choice. I think the reason people did not like the name is because it is a made up name I created myself, but it was a very special name because I had made it out of all the female influences that will be in the babys life. It made me feel bad in the end but the name is one I really love and one of the only ones I could see my child with. My friends and family love it, and alot of people say that they could be loving the name to not hurt my feelings. The one person I know who honestly does love the name is my mother because she was very honest with me about other name choices. I hate that I'm letting it bother me so bad, but now I feel like I would be an awful person for naming m child something that online strangers hated and Im just wondering if I should feel like this. I still love the personally, it's unique and I have never heard it before which is definitely something I look for in a name. It is not the name I posted on here, and sorry but I will not be posting because I'm pretty sure will hate it just as much as everyone on the other site and I don't want to feel anymore bad about it than I already do. All I want to know is would you go with the name you love even if the majority of people hated it?
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Re: Should I feel bad...the whole story
I think you need to get a thicker skin if you are going to be posting on a public message board.
Name your kid whatever you want.
Also, paragraphs please! I could only get through the first half of your post.
BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12
Is this it?
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/75105228.aspx
You posted simply asking "what do you think?". People told you.
And I'll be honest- people IRL are often going to be a lot nicer simply for the fact t that they don't want to hurt feelings or upset you. But I'd bet you that not everyone in your family "loves" it.
But it's your kid. As said, if you're going to ask for strangers opinions, you have to be ready to hera the truth. Especially if you don't explain the significance to us. I have been swayed a time or two on the significance of a name. l
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/75105228.aspx
1- not everyone is going to like a name.
2- to answer your question, if people had a legit reason for not liking a name, like no one would ever be able to pronounce it, or it looks made up (which is a legit reason I wouldn't pick a name), then I would take that into consideration. You may love it, but your kid has to live with it forever. On job interviews, on the playground, at work.
Do you love the names that those internet strangers named their kids. People are so different. I could never see myself naming my kids more than half of the names I see on these sites and I'm sure everyone feels the same. If it means a lot to you & your DH, use it. Don't let strangers who don't care about you or your baby bully you into changing your childs name. Decide & then love your decision with no regrets.
It's your baby so name him or her what you want. If the name isn't disrespectful and doesn't cause harm to your child, go for it. Also, I would not worry about a middle name's popularity at all. Even if 99% of the world hates it, your kid is never going to be called by it unless your family follows that tradition.
I posted asking advice for my second DS's name and not everyone liked it. It's just not their style. I made the decision that was right for us and I haven't let it bother me. As a matter of fact, I'm glad not everyone likes it because if everyone did, we'd see a lot more Levi's and he'd have one in every class growing up.
People will not be rude about the name after your baby arrives. If it fits her, it will not matter what people think, you will be in love with your daughter and her name is a part of her.
Maybe you can wait until after she'd born and then make a decision to see if it "fits" her first.
Angel Baby: 5/29/08
If like 3 out of 4 said no to it, and the 1 out if 4 sounded like idiots, I would probably find another name.
What's said on here is, I think, a good indicator of how people in the real world will feel about your daughter's name. I'm not talking your BFFs and your mom, but her teachers, college admissions officers, and potential employers.
ETA So you got mixed reviews on Alexis, that's okay and wouldn't bother me much. The reviews on Makayah were harsher, but that's the mn so who cares?
I'm hormonal too so I get bent out of shape about silly stuff too. but I wouldn't let strangers impact a name I love unless the name I picked had some huge draw back I hadn't thought of. Like it really meant dog poop in another language or I spelled it wrong or something like that. If it's the name from the thread I read then honestly first name is fine. Middle is not my style but so what.
This.
Well.. Yeah... Then probably don't do that to your child.
See my above reply.
ETA word change for clarity
I can't tell if you are real or not...
Look, no matter what name you pick, some people will love it and some people will hate it. That's life. But if you ask this board for their opinions, they will give it. If you really feel bad about it, maybe it isn't the right name for you.
You need a thicker skin. And some perspective. We're strangers. You shouldn't be losing sleep over what we think.
I wouldn't worry too much about it, go with what you like. Keep in mind that the reponse you get from members of any online board is not representative of the general population, just that small group.
I personally prefer unique names. My husband's name is very unique, and we're trying (unsuccessfully thus far) to come up with something unique for LO. I know a lot of people won't be fans of whatever we come up with but that doesn't mean it's not a good name, its just not their style.
Try not to let others' negative comments get to you. I agree you do need to have thick skin to post on an online forum but it also seems to me that some people don't know the difference between being honest and being hurtful, you can be honest without being insulting.
Natalie Kaitlyn or back to Alexis Shay?
It didn't bother me when they were giving me their opinion on the name it bothered me when they we're being sarcastic and hateful about me deciding to use the name anyway. But I guess you are right I do need to step away. Thanks everyone.
No flaming here, but I will have to say it's NMS. If you're naming your baby after her female influences, why not "Natalie Madeline," "Natalie Caitlin" or whichever two names went into Natilyn. I think using the FN and MN to honor two people is wonderful, but if you try to do too much with one name, it looks forced. GL with your decision.
BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12
This. I think too many people forget that they aren't the ones that have to live with the names. It's great that you like the name, but the reception it gets on a public forum is likely a good sample of how it will be received in your daughter's life as she grows up...which is a consequence that SHE has to live with, not you, so while not everyone will love every name you do, if people express a strong dislike of it, I might rethink it.
However, in the end, you can still decide to name your child anything you wish. If you think that her having a made up name will not negatively impact her life, then you need to go with your gut feeling.
This. Also, I wish people would stop blaming hormones for trivial sh*t.
ITA
I stand by my previous statement: we can't tell you how to feel
yes, I would stick with a name I love. DD has a very Irish/Gaelic name that's hard to spell and pronounce, but I love it and it's beautiful.
And please, put some punctuation in a post like this. It's very hard to read
It's YOUR decision to feel like a horrible person, not ours. They're simply saying they don't like a name, not that they feel you committed an atrocity.
Don't delete. It makes you look ridiculous, and TB never forgets anyway.
Don't name her Natilyn. For one, I read it as Naitlyn, pronounced NATE-lyn, and you'll get that mixup. it's a mashup name and it makes it look like you were trying to be you-neek instead of finding an offbeat name but still within the realm of reason.
Imagine her on the playground, in junior high, and writing a resume. Then re-evaluate
Natilyn is fine. I's just like Madilyn, not a big deal. Pretty with lots of nick names. People name their kids North & Apple & maybe it will be a refreshing change to people who have heard the top 100 names 75 other times that day. Go take a deep breath & get off the message boards. Happy & Healthy 9 months. Good luck.
Kaitlyn, Madalyn, Natilyn, Madison, Natalia, Marilyn, Natalie.. seriously it's not that different with 20 names just like it.
In general, I think people should be free to choose a name they love, even if not everyone agrees.
That said, if a name is truly, truly heinous, that's important to know. Someone does have to live with that name and that name does, for better or for worse, impact how people view you as a person -- the job interviews you get and the income you earn, first impressions on blind dates, etc... You may not like it or agree with it, but it's true. So while "Trixie" is a name that some people choose, it's probably not the name of a person who'd ever be president or the CEO of a huge business. Again, you may not agree, but it's true. Research supports that. "Trixie" is the name of a character on Deadwood. Guess what? She was a prostitute.
With that said, names are very objective, IMO. I came here with my DD's name while pregnant and received some pretty nasty feedback along with some constructive feedback. My feelings were a little hurt, but I put on my big girl panties and reevaluated my name. After, I still thought is was the name and I still loved it. The negative thoughts went away and I used the name.
If the negative comments bother you even after reevaluating then that is telling. Maybe this isn't the name to use if you can't stand firm after criticism.
Giant.
Long.
Sig.
Married my best friend 10/12/12
TTC 1 since 10/12
NTNP Fall 2013 to focus on a healthier lifestyle
What I should have said is that I felt like they were trying to make me feel bad about deciding to use the name. One person even used the comment "that poor baby" and another posted middle names that I did not realize until others pointed out that were sarcastic. But I already feel ridiculous, I guess it was just a bad night for me and I now see I definitely overreacted. Regarding you're comment about hormones.....I'm Not blaming it all on the hormones but they definitely don't help when it comes to my sensitivity.