June 2012 Moms
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Back to Work

I am going back to work tomorrow after almost 13 months home with LO. I am totally freaking out. Its a long time away from my job and I am worried I will be so lost. I am working with the person who did my coverage for a couple weeks so that will help.

Any tips on how to keep my cool?! I am worried about getting emotional in a place I had always remained professional in the past.

Also, if you had gone to work with a LO who is having separation anxiety how did your LO adjust? 

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Re: Back to Work

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    I just want to start by saying it gets easier with time. I went back when DS was 4 months but I had actually been out from the job for 10 months [long story] and I was very emotional. What helped me was asking the daycare for updates during the day so I knew DS was ok.

    If you get overwhelmed with the job, take a break. Take a walk to have a chance to breath. Go to the restroom if you think you're going to cry. I've done this before so don't think you're alone. Going back is not easy.

    Also don't expect to remember everything right away. Don't be hard on yourself. It's not like you've been out a couple of days. It will come back to you but it takes time. I think it's great you have someone working with you at first. That will definitely be helpful!

    My DS had a separation anxiety around when he was 9 months old. And he still has his days where he clings to me in the morning. Those moments are hard but remember your LO will be ok. My DS would cry when I left but then the daycare would text me pictures showing how happy he was after he relaxed and got settled in for the day.

    I know it seems awful now and it will be hard at first, but over time it really will be ok. Best of luck tomorrow!
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    I went back just over a month ago and the transition was way easier than I anticipated. But I also made arrangements to only go back 3 days with a varied schedule so would only "miss out" on about 3 of DS's waking hours. I'll be going back to FT mid August because it's been so easy!

    I had thought about going back for months before, but I didn't really "feel" anything about it and kind of chose to just put it out of my head. Because of that I thought I'd walk in the door at work and just break down. But I didn't!

    I text my DCP when I feel like DS was set up for a bad day [tired, teething, difficulty dropping him off, etc] and she gives me an honest reply of how he's doing for the day. Or when I just miss him!!

    We do a picture a day blog, and honestly, it's such a lifesaver sometimes. I scroll through it almost daily. So keep some updated pictures on your phone so you can catch a glimpse of him when you're missing him! Sometimes I'll take little videos on my phone of DS being especially cute so I can watch them at work when I'm missing him.

    When people at work asked me about being back, I was honest in saying that a year is a long time to not only be gone from work, but also to be home with your baby. I work with mostly women so they were very understanding. I thought for sure I'd have cry in the bathroom moments, but I haven't, yet! Although just a few days ago by the time I walked in the door I already missed him so bad, I thought I'd cry, but I got started on the day and was okay.

    In terms of separation anxtiety and DS's transition, it has been a breeze. We did trial days at the DCP's, two half days and one full day before I went back, although I probably would have done another one or two if I was going back FT right away. DS did great, and because of my schedule he ended up getting 7 half days before going for a full day. It was great!! He didn't miss me at all, sadly! I like to talk to DS at meal times about what's happening that day or the next morning. So I have to go to work so here's what will happen... It may sound silly but it gives me some peace of mind that I feel like I don't just drop him off blind and he wonders what's going on. I make sure I mention the DCP by name and let him know who will pick him up or when I work nights, that DH will be there if he wakes up, etc. I don't know. He probably doesn't understand what I'm telling him, but it helps ME anyway! And when he does understand he'll have a plan in his head about how the day will go without any surprises.

    Hope some of those suggestions as helpful!! I think if you miss your LO, just miss your LO! Don't try to pretend you don't, just accept it and look through some pictures and think of all the good snuggles you'll get when you get home.

    Hopefully separation anxiety isn't an issue but it certainly can be. Just acknowledge that it is a transition for everyone, and one that you'll all adjust to in time!

    Good luck tomorrow!!
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    Thanks ladies, your posts really have helped me get prepared. I have honestly put work so far from my mind that going back has really come up on me out of nowhere. And the old me who likes to work and the new mom me who wants to be home are battling it out about going back. I work in a male dominated field so I think a big part of me is trying to be tough when I see them again just so I don't look vulnerable or unreliable. I know its kind of silly, they are all parents themselves and I am sure they miss their kids just as much as I will miss mine!

    I just have to jump in and see how it goes.

    Thank you again for sharing your experiences! I really appreciate it. 

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    thank you for this post. i will be heading back to work after having 15 months off in august. i am dreading it. i have really enjoyed being home with my little guy and i am hoping i can keep it together too when the time comes to be professional! i still can't believe it only a month away. time. goes. fast.
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    imagestanfordt04:
    thank you for this post. i will be heading back to work after having 15 months off in august. i am dreading it. i have really enjoyed being home with my little guy and i am hoping i can keep it together too when the time comes to be professional! i still can't believe it only a month away. time. goes. fast.

    I know exactly how you feel! I think I am still in denial right now. I try and remember how lucky I am to have had this time together, but its still so hard! 

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    SigirSigir member
    How was the first day? I went back after only 3 mo, but found that w both my kids the anticipation of the first day is much worse than the reality of it.
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    imageSigir:
    How was the first day? I went back after only 3 mo, but found that w both my kids the anticipation of the first day is much worse than the reality of it.

    It was better then I thought! There is one project that seems like it might be a mountain to climb with a ton of problems along the way but hopefully it goes better then expected. Thank you for asking! I was very very nervous this morning... I couldn't even drink my tea this morning! 

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    Glad to hear it went well for you! : ]
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