Babies on the Brain

Rug pulled out from underneath.

Anyone else ever had this problem with their DH? Last week we were on the same page. Today we aren't even reading the same book! Grrr

Re: Rug pulled out from underneath.

  • I think I need a little more detail to answer your question.

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    TTC #1 since August 2011

    My Blog

    September 2012: Start IF testing

    DH (32): SA is ok, slightly low morph, normal SCSA  Me (32): Slightly low progesterone, hostile CM, carrier for CF, Moderately high NKC, High TNFa, heterozyogous mutated Factor XIII, and +APA

    October 2012-May 2014: 4 failed IUIs, 3 failed IVFs, and 1 failed FETw/donor embryos

    November 2014: IVF w/ICSI #4 Agonist/Antagonist with EPP and Prednisone, Baby Aspirin, Lovenox, and IVIG for immune issues.  Converted to freeze all due to lining issues.  2 blasts frozen on day 6!

    January 2015: FET #2 Cancelled due to lining issues

    April 2015: FET #2.1


    PAIF/SAIF Welcome!

  • Of courses. I am 28 MH is 27. We have been together for 11 years married 2 years. For awhile I was on the fence but a few months ago my gut starting telling my now is the time. MH and I started talking about the possibility of starting TTC. So I stopped bc and started reading up on my cycle and stuff like that. Well now it's like every time I mention tithe response I get is less then enthusiastic. And last night I got a response like we should stop where we are. But now like I am on a roll over here starting the mental and physical prep toward baby. Then the rug I was standing on ripped right out!!! Grrrr! Do men do this? Like just flip flop! And will he flop back to let's have a baby?!?! Mixed singles suck.
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  • imageLola246:
    Of courses. I am 28 MH is 27. We have been together for 11 years married 2 years. For awhile I was on the fence but a few months ago my gut starting telling my now is the time. MH and I started talking about the possibility of starting TTC. So I stopped bc and started reading up on my cycle and stuff like that. Well now it's like every time I mention tithe response I get is less then enthusiastic. And last night I got a response like we should stop where we are. But now like I am on a roll over here starting the mental and physical prep toward baby. Then the rug I was standing on ripped right out!!! Grrrr! Do men do this? Like just flip flop! And will he flop back to let's have a baby?!?! Mixed singles suck.

     No men don't normally do this. I would not attempt to conceive with a man who wasn't 100% certain he was ready. I would share with him how disappointed and hurt you are since he told you he was ready and now decided to back out.  

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  • imageLola246:
    Of courses. I am 28 MH is 27. We have been together for 11 years married 2 years. For awhile I was on the fence but a few months ago my gut starting telling my now is the time. MH and I started talking about the possibility of starting TTC. So I stopped bc and started reading up on my cycle and stuff like that. Well now it's like every time I mention tithe response I get is less then enthusiastic. And last night I got a response like we should stop where we are. But now like I am on a roll over here starting the mental and physical prep toward baby. Then the rug I was standing on ripped right out!!! Grrrr! Do men do this? Like just flip flop! And will he flop back to let's have a baby?!?! Mixed singles suck.

    "Started talking about the possibility of starting TTC" is pretty different from "agreed to TTC".  Is it possible you misunderstood his reaction, given your eagerness to start TTC?

    In any case, both partners need to be 100% on board. Give it time, and have some reasonable discussions about his concerns. You've got plenty of time, no need to rush.  

  • Thanks ladies. I know we have to both be 100 on board. I work in an environment where I see severaly women struggle conceiving. I see what they go through each week. I see what happens when insurance companies saying they aren't covering any more fertitaly meds. Though I am young and I know not of any problems fertility wise it makes me think about the clock we all have. And the loud sound of the ticking. And your right I am caught up in my excitement. Ok so time to slow down. I think I can do that for now.
  • Guys get scared. My husband was on board then life circumstances caused him to reconsider. Just be honest with him and trust he loves you so much and wants what is best for your family. I'm 29. We just started trying for baby 1. You have time.
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    My husband was kind of back and forth for awhile. I know it's because he worries about the financial aspects - he's currently stuck in his position at his company because the most senior employees aren't moving on, and therefore aren't opening any positions for him to promote into. My job really doesn't pay the bills and certainly won't cover childcare costs, so I have openly said I intend to quit when we have a baby. He says he will work his schedule so he can be home with kids while I'm working, and that way childcare won't be an issue. 

     However, it took a long time - at least a month of talking about having a baby - before he finally unloaded his concerns on me and made me realize why he had reservations.  We've come to a tentative agreement and TTC start date, and we realized that everyone we know with kids has found a way to make it work, so we will, too. 

    I totally understand where you're coming from. Maybe your husband is having similar reservations but just hasn't vocalized them yet? 

    BabyFruit Ticker

    Married since July 2009.
    TTC #1 since May 2014
    BFP #1 August 13, 2014
    EDD: April 22, 2015
    It's a boy!
  • UPDATE! So this weekend it explained to him how I felt like I was going one way and he the other. We talk for a long time. About everything. My DH is a very practical man. He must have an answer to each question and it most be a good answer lol. But I think we connected on a much better level about our options. Now is a good time. The job I have now will give me the time off. The insurance is super good. Even if god forbid it I would need any help conceving. So we are now in the same book and the same page!!! So now I am just waiting for cd11 to come around so I can start OPK testing.
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