My last minute name dilemma.

brooksidebride · June 2013

So DH just came to me in all sincerity and seriousness and says "So I'm afraid this is going to upset you, but I feel pretty strongly about it." He proceeded to tell me that while he loves the name we have picked out for DS due any day now, he does not want to use the spelling I have been set on. The name is Dashiell. And it's pronounced Dash Uhl. I want to use that spelling because in my opinion and in my research it's the correct spelling. There's the author Dashiell Hammett, the famous naval ship USS Dashiell, the character from The Incredibles, a few celebrities and friend of friends sons with the name, and so on. DH wants to use Dashel. I can't find much legitimacy in that spelling. When you google Dashel, they essentially just give you results for Dashiell. The reason for him wanting that spelling, and he says he feels so strongly about it that he's not sure he wants to use the name if we dont go with his spelling, is that he doesn't want our son to have a name that is constantly mispronounced. Our DD is Johanna and it is constantly mispronounced, even to people who have met her multiple times... They just can't seem to say it right! And he finds that super annoying and says had he known that would happen, he might not have chosen that name for her. I'm having a hard time with this because I've been adamant about using Dashiell because its the real name, and with a different spelling, it's not the real name and not even the same name.

So...

1. Any thoughts or opinions on the situation in general?

2. And specifically, do you think the spelling Dashel is much more likely to be pronounced as we intend than the spelling Dashiell?

JenMatt2010 · June 2013

I would pronounce it "dasheel" the way you like, having never heard the name before.

However, i think you should follow the true spelling of any name and not dumb it down or make up your own spelling...

Mae208 · June 2013

JenMatt2010:
I would pronounce it "dasheel" the way you like, having never heard the name before.

However, i think you should follow the true spelling of any name and not dumb it down or make up your own spelling...

Dasheel is not the intended pronunciation, FYI! I think Dashiell with forever be pronounced like Danielle, but with a sh rather than an N. I think your hubby has a very valid point, ESP considering you already have a pronunciation problem with DDs name.

ETA I don't think anyone would have a problem knowing how to say Dashel. IMO.

dancedance1 · June 2013

While I understand where your hubby is coming from, I think it is important to spell a name correctly. You will probably likely have to explain who to pronounce/spell the name anyways - so might as well do it correctly.

For whatever it's worth, I love the name and it goes well with your daughters name.

kaylynne · June 2013

dancedance1:
While I understand where your hubby is coming from, I think it is important to spell a name correctly. You will probably likely have to explain who to pronounce/spell the name anyways - so might as well do it correctly.
For whatever it's worth, I love the name and it goes well with your daughters name.

This.

JenMatt2010 · June 2013

Mae208:
JenMatt2010:
I would pronounce it "dasheel" the way you like, having never heard the name before.

However, i think you should follow the true spelling of any name and not dumb it down or make up your own spelling...

Dasheel is not the intended pronunciation, FYI! I think Dashiell with forever be pronounced like Danielle, but with a sh rather than an N. I think your hubby has a very valid point, ESP considering you already have a pronunciation problem with DDs name.

ETA I don't think anyone would have a problem knowing how to say Dashel. IMO.

Meant to say "spelled the way you like." I've never actually heard this name before but I like it, but agree that you should use the actual spelling if you're going to use it.

Just be ready to correct morons like me!

zaramarie81 · June 2013

kaylynne:
dancedance1:
While I understand where your hubby is coming from, I think it is important to spell a name correctly. You will probably likely have to explain who to pronounce/spell the name anyways - so might as well do it correctly.
For whatever it's worth, I love the name and it goes well with your daughters name.
This.

I too think it's best to go with the correct spelling. Sometimes messing with an established thing can cause unintended consequences. For example, I would bet money that someone will pronounce "Dashel" like "dash-ELL". My name is "Sarah" - you'd think it would be a straightforward name, but people mispell it all the time or just randomly call me the wrong name (I get "Jennifer" a lot). My own stepmother mispelled my name for years.

I think I'd tell your Dh that with almost any name, there will be some spelling and pronunciation stuff going on. Sure, some names get it worse than others, but it's almost impossible to eliminate. I am also with you in that changing the spelling changes the name. I wouldn't want to change the spelling.

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Lelo2006 · June 2013

Either way you spell it, people are going to be confused, so I say you spell it the correct way.

brooksidebride · June 2013

MrsMooney:
I prefer to not change the correct spelling and I very much prefer how Dashiell looks.

I have always thought that "iell" at the end of the name is pronounced "uhl" like in Daniel, but I also recognize that there might be a lot of issues with pronunciation and this name. Are there any other names that you and YH have considered that might work better?

Also, how do you pronounce your daughter's name? Just curious. I would pronounce it like JOE Hannah but I could see it being pronounced JOE Anna also.

We pronounce it Joe Hannah. We get Joanna a lot, also Jo hah na, and sometimes Yo hah na.

aliwisewoman · June 2013

Probably not, but would you consider just dropping the 'i'? Making it Dashell?

mommygrams0730 · June 2013

I really love this name! Although I think I would have spelled it Dashel, Daschel, or Dashell. I didn't even realize there was a formal spelling for this name.

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led2009 · June 2013

My name is Laura and it gets misspelled and mispronounced all the time, even by family. I think no matter the name or spelling people just don't always pay attention or they're from a different region so they pronounce it differently. It happens with even common names, so your DH is just going to have to get used to it. I'd use Dashiell and it wouldn't bother me one bit to correct people.