Loss CheckIn

Mrs Nice

Hello Ladies! 


Welcome to our Friday checkin! 

I am sorry to have to welcome new loss moms this week but am so glad that you have found us. I hope we can bring each other some much needed comfort and support. Please feel free to join in when you are ready and share as much or as little as you wish. Also, if you have any questions you would like answered, just ask! Any lurkers out there please don't be shy, we would like to be able to support you too. 

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? 

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately?

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week? 

angelsnight

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?  None, I went very backward this week.  I went off the zoloft since i hope to be pregnant again soon and I am not comfortable being on it while pregnant.  I've been feeling the affects of going off, I had a really bad day yesterday and it's like overnight I am so emotional again.

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal?  Trying to get healthier.  I am not doing very well, but I just keep trying, never give up.

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately?  Lately we've been grieving kind of seperately.  But he doesn't seem as angry as he was in the beginning.  But the other day I text him when I was really upset and he told me he was right there beside me, and that he loved me

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?  My girl....always.  Not a day goes by that I don't think of her and miss her.  Hell barely an hour even goes by.

fouadi

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? I got off of facebook, keeping myself busy with preparing to move.

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Getting myself healthier.

 Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? Prepare my days better, always having fresh water, fruits. Taking walks and just breathing.

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? He is back to work, trying to look at things positively.

 Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately? We have been very open and learning new things about each other.

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week? This week I lay my boys to rest, but I am so happy I got to hold them until there last breath and kiss them and tell them how much I loved them. A lot of women never got that chance and for this I know I am so lucky.

princezjk

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? I have done pretty well with accomplishing some goals. I made an appt for grief counseling and an appt to go pick out a headstone for dd.  I also went out twice this week for lunch dates and last night out to dinner for a friends party. I find social anxiety creeping in lately, so I am trying to push myself before it becomes too bad.  

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 

My big goal right now is to try and regulate my sleep patterns. I am sleeping to noon most days and then staying up til 3 or 4am. I am planning to try and wake myself up a little earlier each day, hoping this will cause me to fall asleep earlier. I am scheduled to return to work in 2 weeks and would like to have myself straightened out by then. 

 

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately? He seems to be doing pretty well. He had to return to work pretty quickly, just a week off. So I know that has helped as a distraction, but I also know its exhausting for him to be "on" all day. By the time the weekend comes its hard for him to be social. We've really made a conscience effort to communicate and be honest with each other about how we are feeling  Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?  Always my Izzie girl. I had signed up for a Molly Bear right after our loss. I just recently learned that they have a fundraising program that allows you to help other families as well as move your name up their very long wait list. I was overwhelmed at the amount of family and friends that helped support us to achieve our fundraising goal. It's such a reminder that even in the midst of tragedy, we have so many blessings to be grateful for.  

amandager99

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?  No new steps this week, just continuing to try and move forward and take it one day at a time.

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal?  Getting healthy, and stop eating to cope.  I am happy that I can recognize that is what I'm doing, now I just need to find the motivation to stop and start getting active again.  Hoping that will be soon (I just feel so gross working out while still recovering down there)

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately?  I think he is in a bit of denial.  He has said to me he doesn't need to grieve, he's not grieving.  I'm not quite believing that, he's exhibiting all sorts of emotions I've was going through early on.  Mostly grieving privately because of that, but we do also have our moments together.

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?  The getting healthy and dealing with DH and grief.  Other than that, looking forward to my tattoo tomorrow and getting away next weekend for my birthday.

shandorfml2

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?

Had therapy and loss group, both were helpful

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 

Nothing in regards to loss. Just coping with a new work schedule

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately?

He's doing as expected. It's hard to see him grieve. We've been very open, but we do grieve differently

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?

I'm just really tired and need a vacation!

JessicaG220

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?

 Not really.  Just coping and accepting that Ava is gone. 

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 

My goal at the moment is to get through this Thursday, her EDD.  I am totally dreading that day.  DH and I both requested the day off so we can commemorate her.  We plan to take flowers to her stone and have a picnic.

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately?

DH is doing better than I am.  He used to cry every now and then.  He hasn't cried in a while.  It's always me now that he has to console.  But we have our moments together where we're both sad and we talk about how much we miss her. 

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?

I am getting closer and closer to accepting the idea of trying again.  My doctor advised that we wait 4 months to try again, which pushes us into August.  I'm scared for many reasons.  But I'm also excited.  I want a baby so badly!  But I don't want to replace Ava.  Such a mental struggle. 

Dixon813

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? 
I don't think any different steps.  I did see my entire family (four brothers, two older with kids/babies...) this weekend and I expected it to be difficult to hold my nieces (1YO and 3 mo) but surprisingly I was OK.  I feel like I've been a mess...the last four nights I've cried myself to sleep - different things keep hitting me.  Some times I'm so sad and just plain miss them, other times I miss the lives they'll never have...

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal?
We have dinner plans with some work friends and families this week.  Haven't seen work friends since beginning of May then my DH's big family reunion is Sunday - I really don't want to go, but I know I need to "face" these people and they've been so supportive during everything....

 I read C.S. Lewis's "A Grief Obvserved" last week - this week I want to reflect and write about some of the quotes I liked and what I got out of the book - I think that will help.

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately?

We both can grieve openly to each other.  Since DH is back to work, he can occupy his mind with work and I think that helps him.  He is always there for me (last night i woke him up...) and he says I'm there for him, I guess he just doesn't "break down" as much as I do...

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?

We never painted their room because I was in the hospital, so I've been thinking a lot about that room.  DH has told me that if I want I should still paint it the same  colors, so I'm going to, just trying to decide when to start working on it...

cawettig

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week? 

not really, feel like I have taken steps backwards 

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal? 

main goal is a BFP, I am trying to keep track of everything and I know obsessing over it will not help.

QOTW: How is your SO coping with the loss of your Angel? Have you been open to each other or have you been grieving privately?

DH is doing great for the most part. He broke down with me at work when we met for lunch. He had to hear a baby cry and the mom was walking it around his nurses station in the ICU all day and I was in the ED dealing with drug addicted moms. That day was really hard for us.

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week

I picked up six 12 hour shifts in a row starting tomorrow, I hope I can make it through all of them