did having a preemie influence the timing of your next?

brachysira

So on other boards people have been talking about how long to wait before trying for the next LO, and one consequence that has been cited is that close together can increase changes for preterm labor.  I am 35, was 7 weeks early with no explanation, and had sort of borderline hyperemesis, borderline gd, borderline pregnancy-induced high blood pressure...  I don't want to wait too long for number 2 because of my age, but I don't want my apparently unsuitable body to be even less suitable for number 2 by not waiting...  Did your preemie affect your decision?

MinaE01

I just finished my first cycle TFAS this month. Our preemie is 8 months old, a little over 6 adjusted. He arrived early after spontaneous PTL. I talked with my OB about this. She said it didn't matter if I got pregnant this summer or in two years, the higher risk of another preemie is the same. If we are lucky enough to get pregnant again, I'm hoping that I'll be monitored more closely so that interventions can be implemented if necessary.

It's going to be a risk, no matter when. Good luck to you!

MinaE01

Also, in response to your question, our original plan (before he came early) was to start TTC this summer. So no, having a preemie did not ultimately affect our decision. Of course, we took it into heavy consideration, but after talking to the doc, decided to take the chance.

Missa_g

Yes, it did. We're done but didn't intend to be. After a loss, IF, and preemies we know the deck would be very stacked against us and we're not willing to subject ourselves and our boys to that potential heartbreak. We're considering adoption in a few years instead.

jcsntms06

I took advice of my doctor and waited at least the year for my body to heal. We didn't started TTC for another baby until DD was 18 months old. My girls are 2.5 years apart.

Edit: I was also given the % of having another preemie, but we really wanted to try for another baby. Obviously after having two babies in the NICU I could never subject our family to a third baby. 

KatFCo

It did affect it, but only because I was in grad school. I knew there was a chance I might end up on bed rest, so we waited until I was far enough along in my dissertation that I wouldn't torpedo my degree. Looking back, I'm also glad because, although I wasn't on bed rest, I did have to rest a lot and DD was old enough to understand and do some things for herself.

PhillyGal34

We are still spacing my son and a potential future baby the same amount of time ... We are going to start trying why he's two... But we are trying for a spring baby if possible so that even if
We have another preemie they won't be born during cold/flu/ rsv season. Plans clearly don't always work out or else none of us would be here but ill try.

Also we see my ob/gyn in a few weeks and then we will see what she says. Maybe that will change our minds about timing

BLPL101

We are going to start trying fall 2014. DD was born in December and I REALLY don't want another winter baby. I got pregnant quickly the first time and if that happens again, we'll have a summer baby (Lord willing). 

punky917

It definitely affected our decision since I had a 26 weeker who stayed in the hospital for 4 months. On top of that, I couldn't really concentrate on finding a teaching job so the financial strain would have been so incredible that the idea of TTC for #2 was not even on our minds. When I finally did get a job, I wanted to wait until my first school year was over before we tried again because I did not want to deal with a possible preemie and a new job at the same time.

In the end, it was the best decision for us. I was placed on SBR pretty early on, but I didn't have to worry about losing my job because of FMLA and I was so lucky that my principal was very supportive. Our kids will be 5 years apart, but we are done. We don't regret the decision to wait at all. I turned 35 a little before we got pregnant this time, so can relate with you on the age thing.

Not sure how old your first baby is, but I think that being proactive and consulting with an MFM will help in preventing another preemie and it will ease your anxiety a little (it did with me). My MFM coordinated with OB about the extra monitoring and I really felt like they were on top of everything and it is why I have reached 38 weeks.

tlk432

It did, at least initially. I remember thinking that we may not have another. Even though our kiddo was late preterm and had a relatively short and uneventful NICU stay, it made us step back and wonder what was best for us, our kiddo, our new kiddo. After we decided we may want to try again, I set up appointments to make sure I was as healthy as could be and had a preconception visit with my OB. After lots of extra monitoring and a few scares that took me to the hospital, I'm now 37 weeks with our second kiddo. Our kids will be a little over 2 years apart.

flerlgirl

Originally we said wanted two kids before this happened. Right now, I honestly don't want to have another kid. That will probably change down the line. But I can't do four months in the NICU again.