babysitting question

jilljason2009

So this last week we had a babysitter who has come here before when we were home and this time we left our almost 3 year old was hysterical!!!  We still left but felt horrible.. my girls go to daycare and are fine there.  My question is I am wondering if any of you have this issue??  We are going to leave again and like I told my husband we can't let our kids win..we need a life besides work!!!  HELP!!!

XCrissCrossX

She's used to being left at daycare-- at home, mommy and daddy are supposed to be there (in her mind)-- so she was probably blindsided.

I would prep her for a few hours beforehand "mommy and daddy are going to go out in little while. You are going to stay here with Ashley. Ashley's so much fun!"  Also, if possible, can you get the babysitter to come over 20 or so minutes before you leave for transition time? You may also want to leave when LO is involved with something like dinner or her favorite TV show.

groovygrl

It may not help you but my kids have had sitters since they were born b/c we have never lived near family and have always tried to make sure to have date nights & things and at 4 my DD still does the crying thing when we leave a lot of the time...but, just like daycare, she stops as soon as we leave (or thinks we have left- this is how I know it is definitely true, several times she has thought we left but I was really upstairs or had to run back in for something, etc).  I wouldn't stress it unless it is really extreme & you have a weird feeling about things.

also I try to get them engaged in something before we leave, whether eating dinner, starting a movie, playing w something new, etc... 

cltk12

Ds teachers have baby sat him and ds jumps to them when they come over. Could you maybe have one of his teachers babysit to see if it's better?

Nechie122

Yep, we often have this issue even when she knows the sitter. However, they often tell me she stops crying pretty quickly, within a few minutes. At this point, I feel worse for the sitter!

jilljason2009

Thanks ladies! There is only one lady at the daycare they were at and are starting a new one at the end of July when I go back to work since I am a teacher.  I will definately think about getting one of those gals to come and babysit!  Great idea!!  I do feel bad for the sitter too...she earned her pay that night!!

iverske9

My son will flip out every once in a while. We usually have the babysitter distract him so he doesn't see us leave. That sounds pretty normal to me :-)

LoCarb

I make babysitters sound like they are a special treat.  In addition to prepping the kids, I will allow them to have a special dessert and buy a craft or new movie as entertainment. When the sitter arrives, introduce the treat to the children, they are excited and busy and you can leave. Now my kids push me out of the door when it's sitter night.

*sparky*

We went through this with DS at about this age, even when we left him with my dad who he adores.  I think it is just that they are more aware of you leaving and get stressed out about it.  If you stop going out, or stay home because of the tantrum, it will only get worse.  We had to prep DS ahead of time, make the goodbye short and sweet, and my dad would call me a little later and always told me that DS was fine as soon as we pulled away.

gingerfamily

If we're going out I tell DD the day before to prepare her for it.  I'll occasionally mention it during the day. 

I agree with asking someone from daycare to babysit do she's more comfortable.  GL!