FFST

missyishere

Or whatever it's now dubbed. I'm about to put DD to bed and will have the house to myself, so I need entertainment.

missyishere

I mentioned in the FFFC I sent DH nekkids yesterday. That's typically a green light for "you're gonna get some tonight", but I neglected the poor guy. That means I should tonight, right?

missyishere

Spooko:

Here's a confession to start us out:I have more sex with my self than I do with DH.nbsp;

I don't see nothin wrong with a little self bump and grind.

missyishere

And in fairly positive a lot men have more sex with themselves than their SOs.

missyishere

Spooko:

missyishere:

Spooko:

Here's a confession to start us out:I have more sex with my self than I do with DH.nbsp;

I don't see nothin wrong with a little self bump and grind.

Just because he's not interested doesn't mean I'm not. 

I'm sorry he's not picking up what you're putting down. I know you've expressed concerns about DH before. I have no advice but hope things turn up soon.

nanabanana06

My sex life has become so one sided. It almost pisses me off. I never want to have sex, and when I do the only way I truly enjoy it is with lots of foreplay. DH never wants to throw a bone for me either. It's all about BJ's and anal for him and nothing in return for me. My sex drive is so dead now that I just stopped caring.

LoveActually4

Spooko:

Here's a confession to start us out:I have more sex with my self than I do with DH.nbsp;

Me too! DH and I are on such different schedules and so busy with the kids, it's hard to both be in the mood/alone/have time.

LoveActually4

LD, you around?? I have a penis question.

RTV, Prime and/or fun taint feel free as well!

missyishere

Nana_Osaki06:

My sex life has become so one sided. It almost pisses me off. I never want to have sex, and when I do the only way I truly enjoy it is with lots of foreplay. DH never wants to throw a bone for me either. It's all about BJ's and anal for him and nothing in return for me. My sex drive is so dead now that I just stopped caring.

I hope you don't take offense to this, but if my DH was always insisting to stick in my asss and mouth, I would question his sexuality.  I'm not one to quickly assume something like that either.  If he guilts you into these actions, I definitely wouldn't have my girl boner up either.  It's not exactly sexy when the actions are not reciprocated nor enjoyable. 

proudworkingmom82

Spooko:

missyishere:

Spooko:

Here's a confession to start us out:I have more sex with my self than I do with DH.nbsp;

I don't see nothin wrong with a little self bump and grind.

Just because he's not interested doesn't mean I'm not. 

 I know that you said naked pictures make you nervous (me too) but would dirty texting while he was at work give him something to look forward to and get him in the mood?  

Soxgirl07

I'm also afraid of sending the nekkid pics. What if he opens the text with coworkers within eyesight? What if I accidentally send it to someone else? What if DS1 is playing with my phone and finds a way to send them to someone else? I'm way too nervous for that short of thing!

Way back when we were living in different countries, both in our parents' houses, I sent DH some pics for his birthday. I was so paranoid he'd be sloppy with them and his mom would find them on the family computer.

nanabanana06

missyishere:

Nana_Osaki06:

My sex life has become so one sided. It almost pisses me off. I never want to have sex, and when I do the only way I truly enjoy it is with lots of foreplay. DH never wants to throw a bone for me either. It's all about BJ's and anal for him and nothing in return for me. My sex drive is so dead now that I just stopped caring.

I hope you don't take offense to this, but if my DH was always insisting to stick in my asss and mouth, I would question his sexuality.  I'm not one to quickly assume something like that either.  If he guilts you into these actions, I definitely wouldn't have my girl boner up either.  It's not exactly sexy when the actions are not reciprocated nor enjoyable. 

He's not gay. He still does want normal sex. He just likes it better I guess.I dunno. I just have like zero enjoyment of anything sexual anymore.

LoveActually4

Our older kids always borrow out phones to call people. I'm pretty sure a nekkid pic would get seen and land them in therapy.

missyishere

Soxgirl07:

I'm also afraid of sending the nekkid pics. What if he opens the text with coworkers within eyesight? What if I accidentally send it to someone else? What if DS1 is playing with my phone and finds a way to send them to someone else? I'm way too nervous for that short of thing!

Way back when we were living in different countries, both in our parents' houses, I sent DH some pics for his birthday. I was so paranoid he'd be sloppy with them and his mom would find them on the family computer.

Not everyone is comfortable with sending things out into the unknown.  I just make sure my face isn't showing.  

suv75

Nana_Osaki06:

My sex life has become so one sided. It almost pisses me off. I never want to have sex, and when I do the only way I truly enjoy it is with lots of foreplay. DH never wants to throw a bone for me either. It's all about BJ's and anal for him and nothing in return for me. My sex drive is so dead now that I just stopped caring.

Don't fall into the trap. If he insists on not pleasing you, then don't give him any at all. Did you talk to him about this?

LoveActually4

Nana, you have 2 kids and a puppy at home with you all day. I'm surprised you're standing at the end of the day let alone ready for anal/BJ time. Tell your H to back off til you're ready. You'll be back in the saddle soon!:]

missyishere

Nana_Osaki06:

He's not gay. He still does want normal sex. He just likes it better I guess.I dunno. I just have like zero enjoyment of anything sexual anymore.

How old is DS now?  I think having a small one around kind of puts a damper on things.   I didn't get my mojo back until DD was a little over a year, which wasn't that long ago. 

Runaway22

Nana_Osaki06:

My sex life has become so one sided. It almost pisses me off. I never want to have sex, and when I do the only way I truly enjoy it is with lots of foreplay. DH never wants to throw a bone for me either. It's all about BJ's and anal for him and nothing in return for me. My sex drive is so dead now that I just stopped caring.

Pretty sure this would kill my sex drive, too. WTF, H? Not cool.

nanabanana06

suv75:

Nana_Osaki06:

My sex life has become so one sided. It almost pisses me off. I never want to have sex, and when I do the only way I truly enjoy it is with lots of foreplay. DH never wants to throw a bone for me either. It's all about BJ's and anal for him and nothing in return for me. My sex drive is so dead now that I just stopped caring.

Don't fall into the trap. If he insists on not pleasing you, then don't give him any at all. Did you talk to him about this?

Yes, but then he gets in a bad mood. I don't want to deal with that sh!t right now. So I usually end up bargaining with him. Sometimes though I do put my foot down and tell him no. This last time though he at least put some of the moves on me. It was nice.  

nanabanana06

missyishere:

Nana_Osaki06:

He's not gay. He still does want normal sex. He just likes it better I guess.I dunno. I just have like zero enjoyment of anything sexual anymore.

How old is DS now?  I think having a small one around kind of puts a damper on things.   I didn't get my mojo back until DD was a little over a year, which wasn't that long ago. 

He's just over 5 months. I don't remember if I did or didn't have a sex drive when I had Rosie. I didn't have sex until she was 9 months old and when DH and I started dating and I went right back into being super sexual. Now I'm like... no. I don't want it, I don't enjoy it, I don't feel like initiating, ect ect ect. DH is the one who ends up pushing for the sex, since apparently his sex drive isn't broken. His problem is me and timing. He always wants sex at the worst times. I feel pressure to give him what he wants since I feel like nothing.

LoveActually4

Nana_Osaki06:

missyishere:

Nana_Osaki06:

He's not gay. He still does want normal sex. He just likes it better I guess.I dunno. I just have like zero enjoyment of anything sexual anymore.

How old is DS now?  I think having a small one around kind of puts a damper on things.   I didn't get my mojo back until DD was a little over a year, which wasn't that long ago. 

He's just over 5 months. I don't remember if I did or didn't have a sex drive when I had Rosie. I didn't have sex until she was 9 months old and when DH and I started dating and I went right back into being super sexual. Now I'm like... no. I don't want it, I don't enjoy it, I don't feel like initiating, ect ect ect. DH is the one who ends up pushing for the sex, since apparently his sex drive isn't broken. His problem is me and timing. He always wants sex at the worst times. I feel pressure to give him what he wants since I feel like nothing.

I'm sorry Nana, I don't think it's right you feel pressured.

Soxgirl07

Nana_Osaki06:

missyishere:

Nana_Osaki06:

He's not gay. He still does want normal sex. He just likes it better I guess.I dunno. I just have like zero enjoyment of anything sexual anymore.

How old is DS now?  I think having a small one around kind of puts a damper on things.   I didn't get my mojo back until DD was a little over a year, which wasn't that long ago. 

He's just over 5 months. I don't remember if I did or didn't have a sex drive when I had Rosie. I didn't have sex until she was 9 months old and when DH and I started dating and I went right back into being super sexual. Now I'm like... no. don't want it, I don't enjoy it, I don't feel like initiating, ect ect ect. DH is the one who ends up pushing for the sex, since apparently his sex drive isn't broken. His problem is me and timing. He always wants sex at the worst times. I feel pressure to give him what he wants since I feel like nothing.

Do you think the pressure is in your head, our is he actually pressuring you? I know sometimes when we're in a rut I feel like I should do this or that and that's fine because that's me putting it on myself. But if he's making you feel like you HAVE to do something you don't want to sexually, I'd be concerned.

nanabanana06

Soxgirl07:

Nana_Osaki06:

missyishere:

Nana_Osaki06:

He's not gay. He still does want normal sex. He just likes it better I guess.I dunno. I just have like zero enjoyment of anything sexual anymore.

How old is DS now?  I think having a small one around kind of puts a damper on things.   I didn't get my mojo back until DD was a little over a year, which wasn't that long ago. 

He's just over 5 months. I don't remember if I did or didn't have a sex drive when I had Rosie. I didn't have sex until she was 9 months old and when DH and I started dating and I went right back into being super sexual. Now I'm like... no. don't want it, I don't enjoy it, I don't feel like initiating, ect ect ect. DH is the one who ends up pushing for the sex, since apparently his sex drive isn't broken. His problem is me and timing. He always wants sex at the worst times. I feel pressure to give him what he wants since I feel like nothing.

Do you think the pressure is in your head, our is he actually pressuring you? I know sometimes when we're in a rut I feel like I should do this or that and that's fine because that's me putting it on myself. But if he's making you feel like you HAVE to do something you don't want to sexually, I'd be concerned.

He's not making me. He just get frustrated and then I feel bad. I have this bad habit of not saying no, and when I do I feel guilty. Plus he'll get pissy for a while cuz I like never want to have sex right now or do what he wants. I hate feeling guilty for making someone sad/upset. I'm a people pleaser, aka way too nice and gets walked all over often.

white318

Ok- I will play.  Over memorial day weekend DH and I had sex on a picnic table like teenagers.. our DS and my SS were asleep in the tent so there was no possible way for it to happen anywhere else.   It was amazing...if every encounter were that spontaneous I would totally want it several times a day. So, much better than crawling into bed and debating whether I want extra sleep or sexy time.  Getting old sucks !! 

nanabanana06

ItsAllGravy7:

Nana_Osaki06:

Soxgirl07:

Nana_Osaki06:

missyishere:

Nana_Osaki06:

He's not gay. He still does want normal sex. He just likes it better I guess.I dunno. I just have like zero enjoyment of anything sexual anymore.

How old is DS now?  I think having a small one around kind of puts a damper on things.   I didn't get my mojo back until DD was a little over a year, which wasn't that long ago. 

He's just over 5 months. I don't remember if I did or didn't have a sex drive when I had Rosie. I didn't have sex until she was 9 months old and when DH and I started dating and I went right back into being super sexual. Now I'm like... no. don't want it, I don't enjoy it, I don't feel like initiating, ect ect ect. DH is the one who ends up pushing for the sex, since apparently his sex drive isn't broken. His problem is me and timing. He always wants sex at the worst times. I feel pressure to give him what he wants since I feel like nothing.

Do you think the pressure is in your head, our is he actually pressuring you? I know sometimes when we're in a rut I feel like I should do this or that and that's fine because that's me putting it on myself. But if he's making you feel like you HAVE to do something you don't want to sexually, I'd be concerned.

He's not making me. He just get frustrated and then I feel bad. I have this bad habit of not saying no, and when I do I feel guilty. Plus he'll get pissy for a while cuz I like never want to have sex right now or do what he wants. I hate feeling guilty for making someone sad/upset. I'm a people pleaser, aka way too nice and gets walked all over often.

its normal to have pp hormonal changed but have you thought about asking your OB about the lack of sex drive? There might be something they can do for you medically then you would like it and wowouldn't be doing it out of obligation which is bogus.

I have. I have seriously thought that maybe there was something hormonally wrong, either that or it's Mirena. Which I hope it's not. Since I'd rather not get it removed right now. Sex also hurts for me too. It like burns (it's the best way to describe that) like there's too much friction, but I'm not dry or anything. It's weird. Been like that since I was pregnant. It's gotten me to not enjoy it at all when we do have sex.

missyishere

white318:

Ok- I will play.  Over memorial day weekend DH and I had sex on a picnic table like teenagers.. our DS and my SS were asleep in the tent so there was no possible way for it to happen anywhere else.   It was amazing...if every encounter were that spontaneous I would totally want it several times a day. So, much better than crawling into bed and debating whether I want extra sleep or sexy time.  Getting old sucks !! 

Bam!  

LoveActually4

kiraliz2:

For me, the more I have sex the more I want it. If its been a while, I get less interested. Once I do it again then I remember how fun it is.

This is me too. We'll have streaks then go a while in between.

LoveActually4

My confession is that I keep giving DH BJs because Im still scared of P in V. I swear having babies has ruined my vagina and I'm afraid if I go to the Dr they're going to want to operate.

Seriously I feel like I was stitched up wrong cause I looked down there and things look weird. Like pieces or skin dangling where they shouldn't weird...

LuckyDad

missyishere:

And in fairly positive a lot men have more sex with themselves than their SOs.

Yep.

LuckyDad

kiraliz2:

For me, the more I have sex the more I want it. If its been a while, I get less interested. Once I do it again then I remember how fun it is.

DW is the same

missyishere

LuckyDad:

kiraliz2:

For me, the more I have sex the more I want it. If its been a while, I get less interested. Once I do it again then I remember how fun it is.

DW is the same

Andplusalso, vodka.

nanabanana06

I got some his and hers lube to see if maybe that might help. So I'm not completely broken I guess?

white318

Spooko:

Here's a confession to start us out:

I have more sex with my self than I do with DH. 

 

Here is mine to follow up on this... I don't really enjoy masturbation...never really have.  It gets the job done, but I would much rather have another participant involved.

Runaway22

Nana_Osaki06:

I got some his and hers lube to see if maybe that might help. So I'm not completely broken I guess?

GL. YH shouldn't be off the hook for putting the moves on you, tho  

kj07

Just a little piece of advice.  When your TTCing, don't watch the GoT Red Wedding episode an hour before you plan to dtd.

proudworkingmom82

mamaREB29:

My confession is that I keep giving DH BJs because Im still scared of P in V. I swear having babies has ruined my vagina and I'm afraid if I go to the Dr they're going to want to operate. Seriously I feel like I was stitched up wrong cause I looked down there and things look weird. Like pieces or skin dangling where they shouldn't weird...

I had the same issue where I thought I was either stitched up wrong or going crazy cause I would swoer things were hanging wrong but it has straightened itself out, I bet yours will too.  Sometimes I think sex actually feels better now.   

missyishere

ItsAllGravy7:

white318:

Spooko:

Here's a confession to start us out:

I have more sex with my self than I do with DH. 

 

Here is mine to follow up on this... I don't really enjoy masturbation...never really have.  It gets the job done, but I would much rather have another participant involved.

crazycakes. self love is ahmazing

Having another participant is more enjoyable, BECAUSE of my self pleasure.  It's easier for me to direct him where to go and what feels best.

white318

ItsAllGravy7:

white318:

Spooko:

Here's a confession to start us out:

I have more sex with my self than I do with DH. 

 

Here is mine to follow up on this... I don't really enjoy masturbation...never really have.  It gets the job done, but I would much rather have another participant involved.

crazycakes. self love is ahmazing

 I know it is odd... and I am probably in the minority... but I like peen and g spot O's are my thing. Clit takes too long...

LuckyDad

kj07:

Just a little piece of advice.nbsp; When your TTCing, don't watch the GoT Red Wedding episode an hour before you plan to dtd.

Yep, that killed our mojo the night we watched it.

missyishere

It seems a lot of people on the Sex and Romance board on TN has a lot to do with masturbation concerns.  I think more of us need to post over there for answers. 

NotSharknado

Me and Dh have had sex every night since last Sunday. He's also way into pleasing me. IDK, he musta done something bad cuz he's been a perfect husband this week.