Overwhelmingly angry

amandager99

I barely even know where to start. Unfortunately I felt we were very poorly handled last weekend when everything happened and we lost out son. In the 36 hours we were at the hospital, we probably saw the OB no more than 10 minutes, if even. An initial internal exam, insertion of first set of induction pills and quick check of placenta. The nurses had been great trying to give me what info they could. Well today I get a call from the "nurses station" asking which mortuary service would be picking him up? Excuse me?!?!? No one told us anything about arranging things. She asked if a social worker had talked to us. Umm... From the shock in my voice do you think they have? No one talked to us about needing to make arrangements. Maybe i was naive in not thinking about it, but i could barely make sense of anything. I feel like I've stabbed in the heart. My poor little man just there unclaimed for over a week. I feel like I'm reliving leaving the hospital all over again. Oh yeah, by the way did you know he was alive for 45 minutes? What??? No!!! I heard that any movement would be reflex and that he wouldn't be alive once I gave birth. I feel like a horrible mother, I never would have put him down. I would have talked to him more, touched him more.

How could they not have made sure this social worker came to visit before we were discharged? How could they not have recorded that didn't happen? Am I crazy for being so upset?

Sorry for the rant/vent, but I needed to get it out.

Dixon813

I am so sorry. We have to go through this terrible, traumatic event and the hospital can't even help you with all the information you need?!  Surrounding you with extra prayers as you process this new information...

Noethola

I would be very upset as well. I am so sorry that this is another layer of pain you are having to go through. I wish there was better communication between the case workers and the staff. We ended up waiting an extra 24hrs in the hospital for the case worker. I am so very very sorry that they told you all of this over the phone and that it had to be the first time you heard it. 

shandorfml2

Wow that is so horrible. I am sorry for your expierences...how unprofessional of them! You have a right to be mad.

lrichmond86

Ticker warning



You are completely justified in your feelings. It sounds like it was handled very poorly. I am so very sorry that you are dealing with this. To be told your child had passed when that was not yet the case is just horrific. You are not a bad mother. Good moms love their babies and it is clear that you always have and always will. Again, I am so sorry for your loss and that you are dealing with such a difficult situation in addition to your grief. Many t and p for you tonight!

JessicaG220

Wow.  I am in shock after reading your story.  It is so unfortunate that more often than not, doctors and hospitals see you as a patient and nothing else.  They have little empathy for what we go though.  I get super annoyed at disorganization with appointments, referrals, and communication between doctors/departments.  I am so, so sorry for the very apparent miscommunication you're experiencing.  I don't blame you for being angry.  I would be very angry, too.  Unfortunately, it is our job as mothers to make sure we know exactly what is going on and to ask very good questions because things get easily confused.  I am so sorry you have to deal with this on top of your loss.  Stupid doctors and hospitals!!!!!  Thoughts and prayers to you, hun.