Vacation w/o baby...how to handle goodbye

dns05

So, my husband and I are taking a trip without our daughter for the first time.  She'll be staying with grandparents for a few nights.  She's done an over night stay with them before without an issue, so I'm sure she'll be fine once she's settled. However, we have to drop her off the night before we leave due to the time our flight leaves the next day.  We were planning on doing the whole night time routine at their house and putting her to bed, but I'm starting to wonder if that's a bad idea. My concern is she'll wake up the next morning and discover we're gone and get upset. But, I know she'll also cry if we say goodbye to her.  It may also make it harder on the grandparents to put her down for bed.  What would you do?

jmw222

When we did something similar, we put DD to bed, said goodnight, gave hugs and kisses as usual and that was that.  She woke up and my mom was there and was absolutely fine.  IMO, the bigger fuss you make of it, the bigger reaction you will get.  My thought has always been that it is harder on us than it is on them.

 

mamayo26

We are in the same situation, so it will be interesting to hear what people say.

Based on how DS is in the morning I think we will do the whole bedtime routine instead of saying goodbye. It will probably be easier on me too! 

dns05

I'm not a big fan of sneaking out, which is what I felt like I would be doing if we did the bedtime routine and weren't there the next morning.  But, it might lessen the reaction by her, and make it easier on us and the grandparents if that's how we do it.  It's good to know I don't seem like a bad parent for doing so.  Thanks ladies.

Tink112011

dns05:

I'm not a big fan of sneaking out, which is what I felt like I would be doing if we did the bedtime routine and weren't there the next morning.  But, it might lessen the reaction by her, and make it easier on us and the grandparents if that's how we do it.  It's good to know I don't seem like a bad parent for doing so.  Thanks ladies.

 

We recently left DS for 3 nights for an out-of-state wedding.  I don't recommend doing what we did:

We dropped him off at daycare at 8am (normal time), said good-bye, and hit the road for the 9 hour drive.  My mom picked him up at the end of the day and watched him for the weekend.  He was super confused.  Even though we said "Good-bye" at daycare, he didn't understand what was going on.  I felt really bad!

verticgm

We have left DS with grandparents several times for vacations, once to Europe for 8 days, 6 days in Napa, and a couple of 2-4 day trips for various reasons. Honestly, I am not even sure he realized we were gone. He LOVES going to their houses so we were more upset than he was. We just said goodbye and left like we normally do when dropping off at a location. I am sure the fact that they let him eat ice cream and watch TV, things we don't normally do, went a long way towards him not even noticing we were gone. 

 

Jen0204

The girls have spent a few Saturday nights at my ILs and we always do what you mentioned - put them to bed at my ILs and head out.  They've never been disoriented if they wake up in the middle of the night and we're not there or when they get up in the morning.  I would think doing that is better then making a point to say goodbye. 

Nel11

I think I would do the bedtime routine at their house... I'm not sure how old your LO is but even if you do make it a point to say goodbye, would she realize that this a goodbye for several days anyway?  I know my kid would be fine waking up with grandparents in the morning, so that is what I would do.  Good luck!

Jenny952

If your DD likes the grandparents, then she will be just fine.  I have left DD twice in the last 3 months, both times with my mom, and she did great.  She did ask for mama but grandma brushed it off and they looked at pictures of mama instead.  The biggest thing for my DD was bedtime, as that was when she really noticed that I wasn't there and my mom had to do a little bit of a different routine that I do with her.  Otherwise, she had a fun time and was ready for some mama time when I got home.