patience and happiness as a SAHM

mjb14

I realize this is a very broad question. Do you have patience and happiness as a SAHM? Today felt like  major failure with the kiddos.

mjb14

How do you recover when you do lose your temper?

kcisthebombdotcom

Hav=Fath:

Didn't you have days at work (assuming you used to work) that you just felt like you did a lousy job and would rather be doing something else? But overall you were very likely excellent at said job... same with SAH. Not every day is going to be sunshine and rainbows, it's just not. Some days are going to suck hairy monkey balls, and when the kids go to bed, have yourself and drink and know that tomorrow will be better!! IMO the problem comes when the days you feel like you hated your day far outweigh the good days, until then it sounds like you're human. 

this 

vettymama

I Heart The 80s:

I have wonderful days, and I have days that are really, really hard. And truth be told, I have more hard days than good. They days are usually great until around 3. From 3 until dinner and bed is really hard, and I sometimes feel like once they are asleep I feel guilty for being impatient. The next morning is a new day and we try again. We are all happy, healthy and cared for. But there are days that are super challenging. nbsp;I agree with Hav...I think back to when I worked...there were some doozies. Just like now!

I feel like this too. I feel so guilty when I lose patience and take it out on DH.

cheffymama

I feel like I'm still getting a handle on the whole SAHM thing, so I still find it very challenging some days. 

I'm not a very patient person by nature, but I'm working on it. Some days are better than others, but there are definitely days where I feel like I'm already failing my baby. 

On those days I usually try to pass her off in the evening and  treat myself to a nice long bath, one that usually involves a book and maybe a hard cider, and just kind of recharge myself. After that I give her lots of extra snuggles and we try to move on. 

kcisthebombdotcom

mjb14:

How do you recover when you do lose your temper?

i acknowledge what I did, tell them it was wrong and say sorry. That's all you really can do.

i think it's a valuable lesson for your kids to see you lose your temper. Obviously if its happening every hour it's a problem but on occasion it's a positive learning tool. Your kids don't need to see you as an emotionless person with a insincere smile on your face 24/7.  

pitterpatter129

We all feel that way sometimes.  I accidently put my toddler to bed at 5:30 today!  I just had enough and declared bedtime right after dinner without looking at the clock.  He fell asleep in 5 min... 

You should read this!    https://www.huffingtonpost.com/steve-wiens/let-me-be-the-one-who-says-it-out-loud_b_3209305.html

 

 

4RingCircus

KC_13:

mjb14:

How do you recover when you do lose your temper?

i acknowledge what I did, tell them it was wrong and say sorry. That's all you really can do.

i think it's a valuable lesson for your kids to see you lose your temper. Obviously if its happening every hour it's a problem but on occasion it's a positive learning tool. Your kids don't need to see you as an emotionless person with a insincere smile on your face 24/7.  

Well said, I will keep that in mind for when my little man is older and can understand.  Right now he probably doesn't even notice when I get cranky.

jjt616

Hav=Fath:

Didn't you have days at work assuming you used to work that you just felt like you did a lousy job and would rather be doing something else? But overall you were very likely excellent at said job... same with SAH. Not every day is going to be sunshine and rainbows, it's just not. Some days are going to suck hairy monkey balls, and when the kids go to bed, have yourself and drink and know that tomorrow will be better!! IMO the problem comes when the days you feel like you hated your day far outweigh the good days, until then it sounds like you're human.nbsp;

Hav you've said it better than I ever could. I've actually had one of those frustrating days today. Honestly I just counted down the minutes until bed time and then had a beer while putting her collage together for her birthday party and watching sex and the city. Thinking about waking up tomorrow with dd and spending all day with her and not having to leave her and go teach for the day..... Happiness!

crystalite2004

pitterpatter129:

We all feel that way sometimes.nbsp; I accidently put my toddler to bed at 5:30 today!nbsp; I justnbsp;had enough and declared bedtime right after dinner without looking at the clock.nbsp; He fell asleep in 5 min...nbsp; You should read this!nbsp;nbsp;nbsp; https://www.huffingtonpost.com/stevewiens/letmebetheonewhosaysitoutloud_b_3209305.htmlnbsp;nbsp;

That was a good read for myself today. Thanks for sharing!

CaptainD

I don't post often. Total lurker here but I lurk EVERY NIGHT!! You girls help me get through late night feedings. Sorry. I regress. I just loved this post. I had a hell of a day today with my girls. I got frustrated a couple of times and felt bad. But this post helped me feel a lot better. Thank you ladies! And maybe I will post more too. ;

lindslalala

I have more happiness than patience lol.

There are days when I seriously feel like I'm just watching the clock until nap time or bed time. And then we have days where I'm just smiling over the fun we've had. No day is perfect, but no day is (usually) ALL bad either.

Last week when DS was cutting his 1st molar I told DH we were not having anymore kids. Now DS is back to his normal self and I told DH this evening that I may be ready to try for #2 after this summer.

12bailey18

I work on having better patience every.day. In general, I'm not a patient person so this is something I have to work on. Happiness? Yes. I'm happy I'm a SAHM even though I sometimes have a bad day or blow my top by 7 am. LOL. 

12bailey18

mjb14:

How do you recover when you do lose your temper?

I always apologize to the kids when I lose my temper or overreact about something. We hug and make up then move on. I want to teach my kids that it's OK to apologize because it's something I never heard my parents say then they lost their cool. The kids are young and they move on very quickly. It's still something I actively have to work on and I also don't let it ruin our whole day. Having a bad moment doesn't make you a bad mom.