Bedtime help needed!

AmyNicole622

I mostly lurk around SAHM and AP boards since I feel I relate to both. I need some advice or experience on our bedtime "problem"
Our 2 year old has a current bedtime routine of milk, stories, singing and then sleep. Either my H or I lay with him until he falls asleep. We tried a few times to break this habit but he would literally freak out and say "scared." I'm saying big tears and that petrified look and cry. We tried the "be right back" and he melts down. I have no trouble keeping up our normal routine but with a newborn now, it's going to get very hard when I do bedtime by myself. What would be the AP stance on this? I want him to feel safe and secure but independent enough to sleep on his own. I know they aren't little for long and willing I tough it out if need be.

Emerald27

Could you nurse LO2 while laying with DS? Or keep a bouncer/swing next to DS' bed to put LO2 in while you lay with DS. You could also try wearing LO2 in a carrier while you put DS to bed. We are currently TTC and I foresee doing something like this when we have another baby.

You might try transitioning slowly from having you lay with him to you sitting next to him rubbing his back, then sitting next to his bed rubbing his back, and slowly moving away from him. If you do this while you're singing, it may get to the point where he's ok with you sitting nearby, singing to him as he goes to sleep. That would make it easier to get DS to bed while caring for LO2.

I think the AP approach would be to understand and recognize everyone's needs and to meet them all the best you can. Both LOs will have needs that need to be met. DS needs help going to sleep and LO will have newborn needs. You just do the best you can to lovingly/gently meet their needs. Sounds like you're doing great!