XP: 1 year old minor sleep issue

hopefulmom81

Mobile: 1 year old minor sleep issues

 

I am struggling with something....

DD sleeps through the night in her crib perfectly fine about 50% of the time. 

The other 50% she wakes up around 1:30 whimpering, so I just kind of let that go, but it ALWAYS turns into a full-blown cry.  I don't feel comfortable just leaving her there upset, but I am scared that by always going to pick her up and bring her to our bed, that I am not teaching her how to settle herself.

Once she is in our bed, she konks right back to sleep.

I am scared that I am doing more damage than good at this point.  Yes, I understand that being able to rely on me is VERY important, but I also think there is something to be said for trusting in her and having confidence in her and her ability to settle as well.  I just don't know how to listen to her scream for an hour.

She gets to the point where she stands up, so I am not quite sure how to Ferber her when she is standing.  When I go in there, she gets more upset than anything.  I swear she will cry for an hour or more if I let her and that idea makes me sick to my stomach.

I have also noticed that lately she doesn't just go into her crib without an issue any more.  There was a delightful period of time where I would feed her her last bottle and she would settle and roll right out of my arms into her crib.  Now she has a meltdown.  I let her CIO because the going to bed cry only lasts about 10 minutes.  The middle of the night one lasts FOREVER. 

I will say that she is breaking molars and I think that is part of it, but the inconsistent sleeping through the night has been a regular issue. 

It is like she hates being in her crib alone and I don't know how to fix that.  We introduced a lovey and it isn't helping. 

How do you all deal with a toddler night waking/standing up crying?    

Sorry for the novel, I am just trying to explain everything as best I can  

tbmadeamistake

I'm so sorry, that's so hard!  I know that when I hear my LO start to whimper in the night, if I go in when it's just a whimper, she's often not quiet awake yet and I can fix whatever her issue is (generally she's all rolled up in her blanket or has thrown it completely off).  Once she's comfortable again she's goes right back to sleep no problems.  If I leave it until she's full blown crying, it takes a long time to get her back to sleep.

As far as CIO once she's standing.  I do pretty much the same thing as I did before she could do that.  I go in, tell her it's ok but it's still time for sleeping, lay her down and put the blanket on her, and walk away again.  She often pops right back up, before I'm even out of the room, but I let that go.  At some point, usually only after once or twice, she'll stay down when I put her there and cry herself back to sleep.  I never pick her up out of the crib unless I think she's in pain or needs a diaper change.  Once she's out of the crib, it's a huge battle getting her back in.  

Good luck!

namara5532

We have a crib bouncer as well.  It sounds bad, but most of the time I leave him to bounce.  If he's mostly wimpering, I know he just wants my attention and let him settle himself back down.  If he gets to shrill screaming, I feed him for a few minutes and put him back down.  I'm more leniant if I know he's teething or not feeling well.

Part of your DDs problem may be the molars.  Have you tried giving her a little tylenol before bed to help with it? Also, toddlers don't want to go to bed because there's so much more they want to do before going down.  I wouldn't be concerned with that change.  Give the lovies some time. My DS warmed up to his when I let him take it out of the crib and carry it with him.  I also gave him a few different items to choose from before he picked his lovey.

Every baby and situation is different, and my suggestion may not work for you. But I think a modified version of Ferber where you lay her back down without taking her out of the crib may work in the long run. I suspect you'll have a rough week or so while she gets used to you not taking her to the bed.  Heck, DS is crib trained and still has his nights when he wants to be up at 1am.  CIO is never a fool-proof do-it-once kind of system.  

jsimm

My little girl gets what we think, are night terrors.  If I go in during a full blown cry, she is usually standing, but not quite awake. If I try and rock her, she conks out, but the second I put her down the process starts all over again.  Sometimes this could go on for an hour, to hour and a half.  We started watching the clock to see what happens... we start with 5 minutes, and let her CIO if she needs to. USually those CIO nights only last 10-15 minutes tops. If it does go longer, we go in, pop the bink in and walk away.  We also noticed for a bit there, when she was "teething" that she would wake up when the motrin wore off. Good luck... those nights are the absolute worst! 

dairygirl19

My kid did this about that age too. She wanted a rock and a bit of a sippy and she'd fall right back asleep.

I just did it. I knew what she wanted. I didn't have the heart to listen to her scream. We were all back to sleeping peacefully ASAP.

Bad habit or not, they're still little and need love IMO.

She'll be two in July and now she's up at night once a monthish. She grew out of it.

I wouldn't stress.

TiffanyBerry

1) Are you medicating for the molars?

2) Any recent increase in separation anxiety OR a recent increase in independent behavior/development?

3*) She's 1.  One year olds "trusting themselves" to settle alone is ... well... She's ONE.  From an evolutionary point of view, she *can't* trust herself in any situation.  She needs adults (well, bigger people) to keep her safe.  She's ONE.  Yes, she is safe in her crib in her house, but, on a evolutionary level, her brain doesn't know that.  And it won't for a very long time.  She knows that she needs you in order to be safe.

*As you can imagine, I'm not a proponent of CIO.  If you're a big proponent of it, well, I'd love it if you read up on developmental anthropology as it relates to parenting, but you may not want to and my suggestion here is not going to be up your alley.  And that's ok!