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Blended Families
socloudy99
member
Current state of the family
socloudy99
member
Add your update on your families current event!
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Re: Current state of the family
Me - On CD26 and feel AF coming. I'm finally getting to the point to escalate this with my doctor and find out my options.
DH - Starting his acting class soon. He loved his last one and I am glad he is getting a little "me time" with something he enjoys.
SD17 - Almost done with drivers ed. We are looking at a couple car options and a couple colleges. She has ruled out the National Guard so I was worried for nothing.
SD15 - She is preparing for cheer tryouts. It's a big deal this year so she has had lots of extra gymnastics classes lately which are really building her confidence for tryouts. She also has her first boyfriend and we all really like him.
SS13 - Got an honors reconition for his grades this year. He wrote a wonderful speech and finds out next week if he is picked to start the awards program. We are so proud!
SD13 - Also getting ready for cheer with gymnastics. She is super excited for the dance this weekend. She is also counting down the days till summer break! She is the most excited.
DS is 6 months old today and is amazing. SDs will be here at the end of June and then we got to Memphis to visit DHs family for the 4th. Both SDs have phones and we have been texting a lot and sharing pictures etc. Can't wait to see them!
We just moved and are planning to build a house in the next few months. We are planning to get married once we get settled.
FSD just finished her first year of college and will be living with her mom this summer but will be working for her dad
FSS is still in high school and lives with his mom we do not see him frequently, but FI expects to see him more this summer and will hire him for work too
DS is growing up and participated in T-Ball for the first time. He cries when I send him with his dad, but I'm sure he is fine after I leave but it is still hard to see him go through the difficulty of adjusting to having to live like this.
Things with BD have been fairly quiet. After 1.5 (almost 2) years I am sort of mellowing out and accepting the way things are. BD is still with his coworker. I expect things to stay mellow for the next 1.5 years until DS is going to kindergarten and then it will be more attorneys etc to decided where he will go to school. I was going to try to increase the CS because DS had moved to FT daycare. However, my mom stepped up and will take him one day a week so the increase in less. Though I am still waiting for my atty to get BD's new pay information from January, which no suprise there he did not freely give it to us despite me giving him mine information at his request.
DH just finished another year of school and has the summer off. I'm super excited because now we actually get to spend our evenings and weekends together. I feel like I'm on summer break too. We are taking a grown up trip just the two of us this weekend and I'm so excited. I know I will miss DS but the idea of having 3 days with my DH and no kids is going to be heavenly.
SS is busy with sports and will be off of school in a month. We have offered to pay and take him to a sports camp this summer that is only a week long but he said he would rather 'hangout ." It is frustrating because that basically means he will sit inside and watch t.v. for the majority of the summer, except the weeks he is on vacation with us. BM promised we could have him one day a week to have dinner and for him to sleep over so we are keeping our fingers crossed she actually let's us. I won't be too excited until it happens.
DS is almost 1 and I can't believe how fast the year flew by. He has been crawling and cruising since about 7 months and is finally taking 56 steps by himself. He is the best baby we could've ever asked for and I fall more in love everyday.
As for me, work is super busy but good. Just looking forward to our summer trips coming up and getting some time off. I am starting to get baby fever again but I know DH and I are nowhere ready for another baby righ now.
I'm 10.5 weeks pregnant w baby #3. I am feeling a bit down... I am in the midst of the terrible first trimester, and for the past 2 years I have been pregnant or nursing, and I want to get my life back. Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful to have a healthy pregnancy, but I am also happy that this will be my last pregnancy and after this I can just focus on getting back into shape and hopefully I will feel physically better!
DD#2 is about to turn one, and she is more of a joy every day. She is an expert walker now and chit chatting all day long. I feel very blessed.
DC#1 is 8, and things are going pretty well. She is starting to get a bit moody and prepubescent at times (it's too soon!), and I fear that one day she will want to live w her dad because over at that house, it's just her and no other children to share the spotlight. My DH thinks I am crazy and over-thinking things, and DC#1 and DC#2 get on marvelously (I love to watch them together), but it is a secret worry of mine.
DH is wonderfully supportive as usual. I am the sole breadwinner as he is back in school full time, and he makes dinner every night and helps so much with the baby and DC. I am so grateful to be in a relationship like this, a real partnership.
It's great reading the updates on everyone!
I don't post a ton but...
DS is 13 months and the best thing to happen to our family. He is a wonderful little boy and I hope he stays that way. I hope he is able to have his happy mom and dad live in the same house forever.
DD 6 is 6. Just a normal 6 yo involved in activities and loving life. Not much to report. She still doesn't know DH isn't her dad but I'm sure it's coming.
SS # 2 is 5 and doing great. We see BM every week at soccer and it's actually ok. We have seen her face to face more in the past 6 weeks then we have in 5 years. Summer is coming up and she has never let us have a normal visitation. It always involves court or CPS so I'm hoping this is the year that she backs off. After 5 years with no change I think she would get the hint...there is nothing wrong with our house or him spending time at it.
SS # 1 is 13 and still in trouble and making bad grades. I'm ready for him to be 18. BM is still MIA so nothing new there.
We are doing fine. We have our house on the market, and that's really stressing me out. I'm not even totally convinced I want to sell.
DS (8) is... difficult. He barely made it out of 2nd grade. He is just not motivated academically. He's capable of doing fine, but he's inattentive and just not motivated. The good news is that he's perfectly delightful to anyone who is not me or DH. He is consistently polite to strangers, and he doesn't get in trouble at school. He just got his first level red belt in taekwondo.. the next level is black, so we're all super proud of him.
DD (3) is doing great. She knows the alphabet and numbers both to recite and by recognition. She knows shapes and colors. We've started working on learning to read. Aside from her trying to drop her afternoon nap, we have no problems at all with DD.
DH and I are good. We took an 11-day trip to Italy in February, and I was actually a little nervous. I came into the relationship with DS and we have just never had extended kid-free time. But we had a fantastic time, and we both hope to maybe get another opportunity to take a similar trip in a few years.
XH is still keeping just technically 'in the picture.' Since I laid into him for lying to DS about moving here, things have been pretty quiet. He hasn't seen DS since March and I don't think he'll see him again until August. Then after that, I think he'll not see him again until Christmas. DS called XH the other day and told him he wished they could spend all summer together. It about broke my heart, but I do understand.
In marriage counseling
Registering J for Kindergarten tomorrow
SS is doing well, although we haven't seen him for a while. He's busy being an angry teenager.
My DVR is at 87% and it's stessing me out.
My H and I have been doing good. H is always stressed about work, although he tries to hide it. He is a presenter at a training this month and the audience will be mainly police chiefs from difference agencies in LA County, so that is adding to the stress. I have a love/hate relationship with my job.
DS moved back home three weeks ago and had a job offer within 3 days, so he has been working at a grocery store and seems to really like it. He has also been helping me around the house and taking/picking up my DD from school.
DD is doing cheer and finishing up 6th grade with A's & B's. She wanted to try out for a cheer team, but since it is $500 down payment and $400 each month, I told her that her dad would need to pay for half of it (keeping in mind he pays for his girlfriend's dd to play club soccer), of course he said no. She has only been doing it for a month, so I was secretly happy he said no.
SD has been spending more time with us, which is great. BM said now that summer is coming she can come over more, but come to find out BM has a boyfriend, so she has been very flexible.
SS struggles with school still (he is in 9th grade), but H and his BM are letting him go to Mexico over spring break with his friend (and his parents), H told BM that it will be good for his self esteme, which I don't really see how the two go hand in hand.
DH and I are doing well. His work is picking up again and I just finished my last year of classes for my PhD. DH finally stepped up and started helping with SS and DD more. I had to have a 'come to Jesus' talk with him to get his butt in gear. I just couldn't do everything at home AND my coursework. I start my dissertation in the fall and will spend the summer writing up a study I just finished as well as the lit review for my dissertation. I also had my first publication accepted!
SS is flourishing! He had surgery two weeks ago to lengthen his Achilles tendons. He is a toe-walker and was just having too much fatigue and pain while walking. He'll get his casts off in 2 more weeks. He's doing great in school. I can't believe he's almost finished third grade. Academically, he's on grade level. He's also talking more. I think having the baby has really helped him be more verbal since he has to share the attention. He's more likely to get what he wants quickly if he voices it.
DD is almost 9 months old. She's gotten so big. She's sitting, crawling, and pulling up. If you hold her hands, she'll walk. She's FINALLY started to eat more during the day and less at night. She was flip flopped for a long time. We start the transition to the crib on Monday. I had to wait until the semester was over because I know it'll mean a few sleepless nights.
On the blended family front, it doesn't feel like we are a BF. BM is more and more out of the picture. She hasn't seen SS in over a year, canceling every visit we set up while we were back home. She rarely calls, not even after SS's surgery. When she does call, she spends the time talking about herself or asking about DD.
Currently SO and I live about 45 minutes apart. He lives at my place when he doesn't have his boys, but he keeps an apartment in the city near where they live with their mom so he can have them there every other weekend and one or two nights a week when he gets them. I try to spend some of the EOWE time there with them, but during the week I can't, as I've got my own LO.
Now with this surprise baby, we're trying to plan out a transition timeline to move in together in the town where I live, and have his boys there during his time (my LO will *love* this).
Work is great, and all of the kids are great. My family is totally excited about this new baby, and even my ex is kind of excited (he loves kids). The biggest stressor is that we don't know how any of SO's family is going to take the news, nor his ex. They haven't been very supportive of his divorce, and if they are still mad about that two years later, I'm not sure how they'll take this.
We're pretty much recovered from out March Vegas wedding and April AHR, it was great and fun but exhausting and expensive! DH is an only child and never married before, so his parents are having a great time finally having a daughter and some grandkids!
We're trying for our first together, and just about to the point of getting some "help". Our insurance covers IF pretty well, so hopefully all goes well. I'm not getting any younger!
DS just turned 21 and is getting ready to move 5 hours away to live with his girlfriend. He's got a job up there already and has a third interview for a second tomorrow. Not sure if he'll continue going to college right now or not, but I think he's going to do well. I'll miss my little boy though!
DD1 is about to graduate high school with honors. She'll be going to a great university about an hour away, so we'll see her often. I'm not looking forward to her graduation or her party since BD will be there and he loves to have the glory of parenting without actually having to do anything with them and I know it will tick me off. He says he'll pay for half the party but I haven't seen one dime and her's behind on child support, so we'll see. He did finally get a fulltime good-paying job, so keep your fingers crossed!
DD2 is busy as always, 15 years old and sassy as heck. She's involved with a lot in school, band, orchestra, choir and strings, plus some other smaller musical groups that meet early in the morning, plus she's goalie for the soccer team and still gets good grades. I wish I had her energy! She's looking forward to being the only kid in the house come fall, but I know she's gonna miss her siblings once they move.
DH and I are looking forward to lower grocery bills and a quieter house soon. He's a great stepdad, but it will be nice to have fewer people in the house for sure!
DH got his birthday gift this week (a trip to Alaska) and now that he knows what it is, he is soooo excited. We are counting down the days eagerly til August. In the meantime, he is finishing up paperwork for his GI Bill so he can get signed up for classess, and is still doing all the housework and then some around the house since he isn't currently working.
I am working full time at one hospital and part time at another, making for 60-80hr work weeks, but, again, counting down til August. We are also trying to make a trip to the beach happen during July when we get SS all month, so just keeping my eyes on the prize through my shifts.
SS is doing well, minus the horrendous fits when we pick him up from BM (see post). He has been riding his bike like a madman ever since we took his training wheels off, and I swear every time I see him he looks more and more like a kid and less and less like a toddler, he is getting so big so fast! I am looking forward to our summer together. As well, he called DH for DH's birthday this week, a first ever- normally BM texts DH "Happy Birthday" from her...so that was nice, that it came from SS for once.
Outside of our BF- my grandmother is in the hospital, went in on Sunday. She has alzhiemers/dementia, so it's been rough with everyone taking shifts at the hospital to stay with her (she is a horrible patient anyway, and way worse with the dementia). She went in with a UTI, developed pneumonia, had a heart attack, and they were talking possible intubation until today, she is starting to look better, so fingers crossed.