How much did you "dig" before court?

new+tothis

I DD this. 

Hopeforthebest

What are you going to court FOR? This might have baring on my answer.

cole2144

When we went to court for custody, we chose to focus on what we had to offer SD in our home rather than focusing on trying to drag BM through the mud. We touched on issues that have come up but focused on what we could give SD by having 50/50 custody and the judge ruled in our favor.

hindsight's_a_biotch

He sounds like a grade A chode. You dig for what you need. So if you think your ex is abusive, a drunk, or a closet furry, then you find people and records that back that up. If you don't have anything to prove, you just bring what proves you're a stable individual or whatever your lawyer asks you to.

But digging up everything you can on your ex smacks of douchery and good money says a judge will see it as controlling, intimidating and just plain weird.

Well, unless one of your hobbies is snorting cocaine off a hooker's azz. Then you might have a problem. 

new+tothis

We are going to court over custody and CS. BD wants a huge custody change. While we dont agree with each other we are both good parents. There is no drug or alcohol abuse, neglect, etc. on either side. BD really doesnt have an argument for custody change other than not wanting to pay CS. He wont find anything to use against me so Im not worried about that. Just wondering what is standard.

Pamelacake

The judges in my experience don't like bashing of the other parent. So there really is no need to dig.

In my current situations with my 2 youngest SD's on the other hand, BM is making herself look like a total @$$ and when court comes we have no need to bash her.