Need to vent about my Mother's Day

loreeann86

This is going to be long, sorry. But need to vent somewhere. I have to start off with a few days before Mother's Day. We live 4 1/2hrs away from all of our family and friends and this past Thursday we took a trip back home and left Saturday afternoon. We had the whole trip planned out, everyone knew our plans so that everyone got to see us. Everyone knew we had to leave early Saturday afternoon because my DH worked Sunday morning. So Thursday when we get in town we go visit my MIL at her work, then when she got off work we hung out at her house for a few hours. Friday was crazy busy with other plans. And Saturday my family planned a Mother's Day BBQ and both families were invited. I asked and my DH asked my MIL to come multiple times. But she refused. But she demanded we come back to her house after so she could see us. Um NO! The point in the BBQ was for everyone to get together and see our DD we don't have time to run around and make special time for you. She had the most uninterrupted time with her out of everyone. We end up swinging by her house after BBQ to say bye but we didn't get out of car cus DD was sleeping and we wanted to get on the road.

Sunday morning I wake up around 7am with DD, feed her, dress her in a outfit from my MIL, take a pic and caption it saying Happy Mother's Day. I text it to her then I get on FB and see she posted on my DH's page that "its a horrible feeling when your son and daughter in law don't wish you a happy Mother's Day!" It wasn't even 8am yet and your going to post that on FB?!?! I was so upset, way to ruin my first Mother's Day. My DH saw it and deleted it, he called his mom but they ended up playing phone tag. His mom left him a VM crying her eyes out saying she just didn't want to be forgotten and she deleted her FB account. I got a sweet card from my DH but the rest of the day was just a normal day with me cooking dinner. Guess I just had higher hopes for my first Mother's Day.

Then my MIL text me today asking me to add one of her friends to my FB so they can see pics of my DD since they can't see it through her anymore....really

Am I being too sensitive? Because this whole thing just bothers me!

zonagirlie

Unless your mil is 13, she's insane. Sounds like she feels replaced by you. Is your hubs the only child or something? Make your stand and get your husband to set some boundaries.
It'll only get worse if your husband NOT YOU doesn't put his foot down.

ohiodoxiemama08

No, definitely not being too sensitive. I agree with PP sounds like she's having an issue with being replaced or something. Sounds incredibly frustrating. Hugs to you! Is she the kind of person you could have a serious talk with and explain your feelings? Might help if you air it out and maybe she'll realize she's being a bit childish.

dlbrous

Very childish!

Allison546

OMG, what a drama queen. I'm really sorry. Don't let her get to you and make your DH deal with her. I'd ignore her for now and not even respond, seriously.

OakTreeMommy

Wow, no your not being too sensitive at all. What is it with MILs on Mother's Day. I wonder if they do somehow seemed threatened by us new moms taking the attention away from them, but come on if it's our first Mother's Day is that to much to ask to make it special for us? They've had years and years already. I don't know if anyone has experienced this but I had absolutely no issues with my MIL before we got married and had a baby now...crazy town. But I'm sorry that your first Mother's Day wasn't as special as you hoped it would be, here's hoping next years is better!

loreeann86

Thanks ladies, knew you guys would understand. Didn't want to tell my mom or sis and start drama. But she has 4 kids, my DH is 2nd to oldest. The other 3 do absolutely nothing with their lives, no jobs, no Boyfriends or girlffriends and live off her. My DH is the only one that did something with his life. My MIL and I have always gotten along great, DH and I have been together 6yrs and married 2 in June. But since having a baby it's like things did change with her. I've just ignored her texts, will not write back. I have more important things to do! I'm going to have a talk with my DH, I know he'll put his foot down. I'm really a quiet non confrontational person especially when it comes to family. I finally put my foot down about them letting me put DD down for naps. They were complaining and mad because they want to hold her and pass her around. Well she's not going to sleep like that. She's use to being laid down in her crib for all her naps.

loreeann86

2013mommy:

Um, no you are not being too sensitive! Your MIL is being crazy. Why would she expect you to have said something before 8am when you have a baby to take care of? Also the BBQ she kept refusing to go to was to celebrate Mother's Day so she should have gone to that! It's probably good she deleted her FB account. And I would definitely NOT add one of her friends!If it makes you feel better my MIL blocked ME from FB after sending DH a 5 page letter about what terrible person I am and that he should leave me and she sent the letter when I was 5 months pregnant!. Older people should be allowed to have social media!nbsp;

Wow sorry about your MIL, that's horrible especially while you're pregnant! I agree, I've realized old people and people under like 16 should not have a FB. Too many problems and drama.

LMS05

I thought my mom was immature, but your MIL takes the cake. You aren't being too sensitive at all. Sorry your Mother's Day was not a good one

jobiann

She sounds crazy cakes...thank the Lord I have an awesome MIL.

What does she expect from you...doesn't she realize you and your daughter are her son's priority now...not her. Plus, if it was 8am like you said it was she was really jumping a little too quickly.  

I'm sorry you had to deal with that...I wouldn't add your MIL's friend just so she can see the pictures. She can either get her own account like a big girl or get pictures when you send them to her like any normal person.  

loreeann86

jobiann:

She sounds crazy cakes...thank the Lord I have an awesome MIL.What does she expect from you...doesn't she realize you and your daughter are her son's priority now...not her. Plus, if it was 8am like you said it was she was really jumping a little too quickly. nbsp;I'm sorry you had to deal with that...I wouldn't add your MIL's friend just so she can see the pictures. She can either get her own account like a big girl or get pictures when you send them to her like any normal person. nbsp;

I thought she really jumped on it quickly too...of course we were going to tell her happy Mother's Day. And we weren't going to wait till the end of the day. Just wait till we had a free moment. I really wanted to comment back something mean but bit my tongue. But now I'm going to think of her differently and the next time we do drive down to visit I'm not going to want to see her. And I always thought I was a lucky one with a great MIL

rockyrollgirl

Sadly this reminds me of my own mother. She is overly dramatic and very neurotic. I seriously have to be very careful with everything I do and say. If I don't respond to her texts right away she gets all emotional. Trust me when I say there is really nothing you can do about this. She dosn't want to socialize with my husband's side of the family so this can mean two holiday trips. I do not know why this is, I guess insecurity issues. I have tried being indifferent, blunt, understanding and sensitive to it. She is still like this. I have dealt with this my WHOLE life lol. *sigh*. Try not to let her ruin any future mother days plans.

bstengler

im so sorry you had a bad mothers day. i dont think you are being to sensitive at all!! its almost like people dont understand this is your first mothers day DD's first with you and everyone else feels like its godda be alllllllll about them.

(can you tell i had a bad mothers day to??)