the thought of trying again terrifys me.

ctilley7911

When we lost Benjamin i had to know right away if it was even a possibility that my husband would try again for another baby when i was physically and emotionally ready to try again. I asked this because we got pregnant by suprise and well my husband never wanted children, but i saw how he came around with this pregnancy and he was becoming excited and then we lost our baby last min.

He was devastated at our loss he just cried over Benjamin. He told me we of course can try again when i am ready. That at first gave me some comfort but i knew it could never replace Benjamin or the pain i have from losing him. 

Now though i am truly terrified to try again, I am so scared of this happening again i cant go through it again especially this far in. I'm scared i am broken that its me that did this and not some freak incident. I know i have a lot more grieving to do and its all fresh and raw right now and i may feel different later. It's just not fair that ill not be able to enjoy being pregnant again due to the fear of this happening again. Especially with you poor mothers who had a living baby only to lose them shortly after. I am sorry for all you grieving mothers.

shandorfml2

Might want to change your tickers sweetheart, incase someone is having a bad day.

I'm sure we can all agree, we know how you feel about trying again. It's terifying. It won't be a happy-go-lucky pregnancy, because we all know what could happen. We'll just have to take it day by day, when we are ready.

fluttergirlmoonchild79

****SIGGY WARNING***

 

 

 

When your desire to have a child out weighs your fear, that's when you're ready.  DH and I were the "never going to have kids" people and then surprise!  After everything happened, we decided we were going to try again but we personally decided that we were going to wait a year and that's exactly what we did.  As you can see from my siggy, we're expecting our rainbow.  To say I'm not terrified would be a lie but I keep telling myself that this child isn't my son and it's all worth it just to hold one again.

ctilley7911

yes i am sorry i been meaning to just hard and just been out of it still just seems like a dream. I also told my husband i think i want to wait a year before trying. He seems fine with it.  I just want to prepare my self physically and emotionally before trying.