Obligated

arilevine

Hi ladies- would love your advice on this one...

Yesterday I received a graduation announcement for a friends daughter that lives in Denver, we moved two years ago to Las Vegas and we have barely kept in touch and I haven't seen her since before the move even when I go back to Denver to visit.  They did come to our wedding in 2010 but I didn't invite her to my Denver baby shower last summer.  Am I obligated to send her a gift now that she sent me an announcement? 

jd614

everyone has different opinions on this but i feel like yes. if ever im invited to something, even if i dont go i send a gift. can be something super small but just a thought. i feel like its the right thing to do-but again everyone has different opinions on this. how annoying for you tho!

mrsnala

I agree everyone is different, and it may not be proper etiquette, but I would maybe send a card with congratulations on graduating, but not a gift. With a card, you are acknowledging the accomplishment. To me, sending the graduation announcement is gift grabby to me. 

mben1119

Graduation announcements are just money solicitations. There's no other reason to send one out. If I received one, I'd just send a card with some $$.

SummerOH

I disagree that announcements are gift grabby, to an extent.  I think sending them to close friends and family is nice.  I love getting announcements with senior pics enclosed of my relatives and close friends' kids.  In your case OP, I do think it's a solicitation for $$.  I'd send a congratulations card and be done with it.

christinak22

It's just a graduation announcement, not invitation to a party or anything? I think of those as just an FYI type of thing, not requiring a response at all. Like a Christmas card or baby announcement. Do people send gifts when they get baby announcements? Maybe I'm out of the loop on this.

526SadieSadie

If it's just an announcement, I don't think you need to send a gift.  You can send a congratulatory card to the graduate and leave it at that.

LoCarb

Obligated? no. However, I would send a card with money.

arilevine

Thanks for the feedback- there was not an invitation included which is fine because even if there was we obviously wouldn't be going seeing as we live in another state. 

EastCoastBride

Announcement or invitation - neither are "requirements" to send a gift.  Ever.  If you want to, that's fine, but I wouldn't send a gift even if it was an invitation. 

KathrynMD

I graduated 20+ years ago, but when I did, the school sort of threw a packet of announcements at you - and I sent them out to all my parents/family friends.  I didn't think of it as a gift solicitation, the school presented it to us/my parents as the standard protocol to let people know you are graduating.  I'm sure they still give them to kids to send out (and include a fee for them) that is all wrapped up into a "ceremony" or graduation fee.

Netty_3

christinak22:

It's just a graduation announcement, not invitation to a party or anything? I think of those as just an FYI type of thing, not requiring a response at all. Like a Christmas card or baby announcement. Do people send gifts when they get baby announcements? Maybe I'm out of the loop on this.

I agree with this.  It's an announcement. If you had been invited to the party I would say...that's a gift solicitation. I would do like PP said and just give a card saying congratulations...without a gift. Or maybe call your friend and catch up, and tell her congratulations that her child is graduating. I'm sure her son/daughter...sorry already fro got the gender...knows you received one.

Netty_3

christinak22:

It's just a graduation announcement, not invitation to a party or anything? I think of those as just an FYI type of thing, not requiring a response at all. Like a Christmas card or baby announcement. Do people send gifts when they get baby announcements? Maybe I'm out of the loop on this.

I agree with this.  It's an announcement. If you had been invited to the party I would say...that's a gift solicitation. I would do like PP said and just give a card saying congratulations...without a gift. Or maybe call your friend and catch up, and tell her congratulations that her child is graduating. I'm sure her son/daughter...sorry already fro got the gender...knows you received one.

laurakaz13

If you are not close then no.  If it was my nephew or a good friend's kid, I would send a card and money.