Potty Training Question

+just+j+

Is it odd that my 3 year old is not fully potty trained yet?

Ugh, it's the only thing in her development that she did not move fast on.  Tonite however was the first night she went to the potty by herself without telling me.  She did it all by herself up until the end where she needed new pull ups and pants back on. Then she hollered for me to help.

I just let her go, pretended I didn't notice, and quietly peeked to see how she was doing.  I then made a big deal out of it when she called me and told her how proud I am.

So any advice on how to close the deal?  Still no #2 on the potty.  Her new day care provider has helped - there are only 3 kids during the day while the older ones are at school, so she gets more focussed attention on the training.

So we're improving, but slowly. 

Any advice on how to close this deal. I want her potty trained completely ASAP. 

kimmygirl77

I will be watching for answers because my 2 and a half year old wants nothing to do with the potty. Will hold it for hours if I put her in panties. If she is in pullups or diapers she goes and tells me that she is going number 1 or 2 in the diaper. If I suggest that we use the potty she runs away and tells me "no" then cries. I have tried incentives. M and ms, stickers, potty chart. They work for about an hour and then she gets bored and doesnt care. I jump up and down and dance and sing when she goes..... she doesnt care. She looks at me like  i am crazy!! I guess she isnt ready.......ugh!

Amanda88

She is totally on track. Some take longer. I know kids who weren't fully trained until 4 (I've read of some who have taken longer).I potty trained my SS, and it is really all dependent upon when they are ready.

When I pted SS I reminded him to try to go potty every couple hours, and rewarded every time for a few weeks with an M&M, and then after that only when he asked for his M&M. He had a really hard time going #2 for anyone but me. I would just keep at what you are doing, and keep up with the praises. #2 on the potty can be scary for kids.

You may introduce some potty books and/or put a small toy bin in the bathroom for toys to play with while she tries to go potty. These special toys/books are only for potty time. We bought Elmo's Potty Time DVD to help encourage SS to use the potty and help lessen his fears about using the potty. I swear we watched that DVD for months. 

The less pressure she feels to be potty trained the better experience you both will have. It took a long time after BM's H spanked the poo out of SS for going #2 in his diaper when he was 2 for him to even think about pting again, so keep it positive. Make sure everyone is on board with being positive even if accidents happen. 

I think you are on the right track and there is no need to rush her. Keep up the good work and she will be there before you know it. Good luck! 

karleegirl

Ds2 was 3yrs 8 months before being pt'd. He was among the last at dc but he was trying.
Does your dd have regular bowel movements? That ended up being part of our issue. We ended up with him holding it out of fear and the kid was on rx laxatives for months.

Wahoo

In my experience (both kids) potty training for #2 is harder.  My tips (which may or may not work for you):

1) Buy the book "Everybody Poops."  This is what got DS over the hump!  It was recommended by a special ed teacher who swore by it.

2) Make sure your DD eating enough fruits and veggies / fiber.  If she is constipated it is more difficult / painful / scary to poop.

3) I gave double rewards (2 stickers, in our case) for #2s. 

Lol - I just had to edit because I initially used "BM" which has a whole different meaning on this board!

Littlejen22

My BFFs youngest turned 3 in Dec and is not at all PTd or interested. I did not PT until a week after turning 4 when my Mom said if I wanted to start school I could not go in a diaper or my pants, I still finished college and get into a Masters Program lol. If that is her only thing do not worry at all. My friend is not worried because her oldest gave her such a hard time and had accidents on and off for so long that she is not rushing her youngest. You are fine.

Sunday924

I babysit a little girl who will be 3 in June and she isn't potty trained yet. She does go on the potty but not all the time. It's really hit or miss. I try to sit her there every hour but it still doesn't work. 

fellesferie

DS took about 9 months was not fully out of pull ups until about a month before he turned 4. DD potty trained over the course of about a week and was done a couple months before she turned 3. 

With DD, what I felt worked well:

- We put her little training toilet in her room so if she needed to go at night, she didn't have to go far.

- I went to Michaels and got a bunch of beads and stuff to make necklaces. Every time she went potty, we would add another bead to her necklace. 

- If she had an accident, we'd just hug her and say it was okay. We never made a big deal out of it.

- We got her little girl undies she loves--Rapunzel, little ponies, pink ballerinas, etc.

That's really it. We didn't do much different with DS (he got little $1 match box type cars when he'd go a whole day without an accident), so it really depends on the kid. 

DS really resisted potty training. He also resisted giving up his bottle. He also resisted learning to read... and most other things. He is a kid that learns things when he is fully ready and not a second before.

Ilumine

Honestly, going totally by themselves (ie without prompting and supervision) is not something that they are going to do right off the PT bat. 

So on THAT note, do not worry.  You will still have to remind her, be there for her to let you know when she has to go to then direct her and maybe even clean up afterward.  DD stopped using diapers/pull ups at 2.9.  But wasn't heading off to the bathroom on her own (without prompting or mentioning that she had to go) until she was well almost 4. 

As for the pooping thing....for some reason that is a big scary for kids.  Not sure why.  DD was very happy to poop in the potty.

HOWEVER, we used the Commando method.  She was naked for 3 days, with a small kids potty and a very very very diligent mommy.  She had 2 pee accidents down her leg and one poopy accident down her leg.  

SHE HATED THAT.  

And once we started on PT, we only used pull ups at night.  SO when she had just one more POOP accident, she FELT IT again.

And she has not had poop accident in 2 years.  She is very very very clear about pooping on the potty because it is either than or in her panties... 

+just+j+

Well, I'm doing a lot of your suggestions already, so if anything, you made me feel normal. I can not tell you how many times people (especially family) who make me feel like DD should be trained by now.

I don't punish. My cousin punished her daughter for going #2 and it worked for her, but I can't see humiliating my child over potty training. It's difficult enough.

Lots of praise, love, hugs, etc happen in my house.  If she has an accident we say, "Oh deeear."  and then I talk to her about what to do next time. 

We went to the pre-school open house a couple of weeks ago and she loved it.  She also gets excited about school buses so I told her she can't go to Pre-School until she goes on the potty and is in big girl panties.  It's helping a little.

I don't expect her to just go on her own, but it was just a nice little surprise and mile marker I think in training.  It means she's getting more independent and comfortable going on her own.

She does pretty good most of the day, but we still have one or two accidents.

XH thankfully seems to be keeping up with the training. I don't see her reverting back at all after his weekends.  I'll give him that much.

So I'll just keep doing what we're doing.  Maybe I'll try the naked weekend thing. 

Littlejen22

We used the 3 day potty trainin method that I learned about on The bump and did not buy the pamphlet. But I did it during the summer so we were outside naked a lot without accidents on carpet!

bosoxy

I used the cloth training pants so he could feel things better.  Also, instead of using a potty seat, I put a cover on the toilet for his size.  This made him feel like a big boy.  I also used cheerios to aim at.  I think boys are easier to train though.

Ginlyn0

I'm there with you. DS turned 3 last week. He does pee in the potty about 50% of the time. Has only pooped in the potty once and that was before we actually started and I sat him down because I could tell he was going. Both of my SSs were nearly 4.5 by the time they were completely PT. It sucks but some kids just take longer and that's okay.

karatechrissy

Not sure your stance, but I never dealt w pull ups. I put undies on dd when she started potty training, and there were a couple accidents that weren't fun to clean, but literally I can count how many on my hand. Do you think getting her undies like a big girl would help? I put a pull up on dd at night bc I am not ready to tackle it, and her potty trained during the day by 27 months I was happy w that. But I know at this point she doesn't need it and just uses it as a crutch. I need to pull the plug but have been selfish lately not wanting to deal. But I need to. Anyway, have you tried undies instead of the pull up? Only took a few times before dd decided being wet down there was no fun. Lol

+just+j+

Tried the panties, but daycare didn't want to because of the mess and having to deal with other children in the process.  But...I think this weekend will be a panty and/or naked weekend.  Maybe she's old enough now that will grab hold. 

Tasheystar

Wahoo:

In my experience both kids potty training fornbsp;2 is harder.nbsp; My tips which may or may not work for you:
1 Buy the book "Everybody Poops."nbsp; This is what got DS over the hump!nbsp; It was recommended by a special ed teacher who swore by it.
2nbsp;Make surenbsp;your DD eating enough fruits and veggies / fiber.nbsp; If she is constipated it is more difficult / painful / scary to poop.
3 I gave double rewards 2 stickers, in our case for 2s.nbsp;
Lol I just had to edit because I initially used "BM" which has a whole different meaning on this board!

Lol. Wahoo we had a literacy day at school where the kids had to bring their favorite book in. One kindergarten student brought the book Everybody poops. It was funny because all the teachers wanted to see it and were secretly passing it around during the movie we were watching. The movie was Bedtime stories to fit with our theme. The kids got to wear pjs to school as well.

ODS still hates going 2. That took longest for us as well. I think it was the pain of it, though he eats more fruits and veggies than I do.

I have a friend who's daughter will also hold it for hours... Frustrating.

Would some washable training pants work maybe?

Edited to change name.