UPDATED: DH, DS and Makeup. Advice?

CMSullivan326

Ok, so, a few days ago DS came to me and wanted to "do my makeup". He used crayons to do my eye shadow and blush and a fake brush to "paint it on". DH told me not to let DS do it because "he's a boy and shouldn't be 'putting makeup on me'" DS was having fun and I saw no reason to tell him no.

Well, earlier today I was doing my makeup and DS was standing at the bathroom counter with me, watching like he always does. After DH got home, DS wanted to "do my makeup" again and I let him. DS was having so much fun and told me he was "making me pretty". When DH heard that he gave me a look and walked out of the room. He later told me that I really need to stop letting DS do that. He actually got really upset about it but the only reason he's giving me is because "he's a boy". So? Who cares if he's a boy? He's just playing.

So, what can I do about this. I have no reason to make him stop. He'll be 3 next month, to me, he's just exploring and having fun. What can I say to DH to make him relax about it? Only thing I can really do right now is not let DS do it when DH is home. But I don't wanna hide it from him or make DS feel like he can't do certain things around DH. Any advice? TIA.


UPDATE: DS mentioned makeup and DH gave me "the look" again. This is how it went down...

Me: Wipe that look off your face. He's not doing anything wrong. He's 2 for christ sake and I don't give sh!t if he's a boy. He's using his imagination and having fun. Deal with it.

DH: But he's a boy and boys just shouldn't play with makeup...

Me: He's not playing with actual makeup but you can bet your sweet asss that if you keep b!tching, I'll buy him his own makeup! He's doing nothing wrong, you're being ridiculous and your reasoning sucks...let it go....::hands DS his "makeup" brush::

DH: ::silence::

PrincessFiona9

Packerfan79:

Spooko:

Basically, I'd tell DH to shove it.nbsp;

This.

+2

MandaPanda518

DS does the same thing with me. DH tried the same routine as your DH. When he said he shouldn't be doing makeup because he's a boy, I just asked him what being a boy has do with it. DH didn't have a good response so he dropped it.

J+MS

He's using his imagination, it's not going to hurt him. Your H needs to get with 2013. and plenty of men make great cosmetologists.

amykins1283

DS1 likes to dress.up like Princess Leia, pretend to do my hair and make up, and has an Ariel doll for the bath. He also wanted a pair of sparkly girl shoes from Target but we were there for sandals so he didn't get them. But I didn't care thathe wanted them, they were pretty cool. He also likes superheroes and lightsabers, and other stereotypical boy stuff. DH knows that at this age he just likes what he likes and just goes with it because it doesn't matter.

I would just explain to your DH that DS is just mimicking what he sees and that it doesn't mean anything except that he admired and loves his mom.

RondackHiker

Igoo0304:

He's a toddler. They're curious about what others are doing. Your DH is being ridiculous.

I agree with Igoo.

Courtimilk

So if you had a DD would she not be allowed to play/watch sports because ''she's a girl''?

ASmallWonder

You probably have to get blunt and direct to make him see the absurdity.  Nothing we girls do is what make us like men.  Your sexual attraction is something you are born already having inside you and outside interests don't define who you're attracted to.  A daughter who had a major interest in hockey or cars or whatever isn't more likely to like women.

I agree with the person who said he is acting on the gender norms he grew up with but that he needs to come along and get with the program.  DH temporarily commented on DS having a play kitchen.  I finally said "You'd be fine getting him a play grill so it's ok if he cooks as long as it's not in the actual kitchen huh?  His future wife is going to love you for raising him to think he doesn't need to know how to cook."  He realized it was absurd and dropped it. 

klondikebar

Igoo0304:

He's a toddler. They're curious about what others are doing. Your DH is being ridiculous.

This. He's playing along with mommy. It's normal toddler behavior. Your H needs to relax.

DH had a single mom for a part of his life. He'd help her get ready for work by curling the back of her hair. He blow dries my hair for me sometimes. I'm glad his mom didn't discourage it when he was little b/c I enjoy the pampering!

Kitiara5512

Lol. My kid sports silver toe nails, my earrings, and loves to play with my makeup brushes (no makeup though). He also plays with his kitchen. And monster trucks, dinosaurs, transformers, and trains. Really don't think playing with make up or any of those other things is gonna give him the geigh.

FrickandFrack

gwinnygirl:

Good grief. Tell him that your son can't catch gay. Seriously, it's just playing make believe, he should be proud his child is using his imagination.nbsp;

Yep

NotSharknado

Ds used to love "doing my hair" and when Dh made a comment I basically said too bad. As for advice, all I can say is, tell him to get over it and this is not a big deal.

proudworkingmom82

I would straight up tell DH he's being ridiculous, your DS is just young and having fun exploring, I don't see any harm in it.  Ask DH to tell why it matters so much to him?

Nita2603

Spooko:

Basically, I'd tell DH to shove it.nbsp;

Yep, this.

RayRay007

I'd probably really put my foot down and not try to appease DH in any way, including hiding it. He is being absolutely ridiculous. The boy isn't even putting the makeup on himself! lol.

RondackHiker

I'd have to call him on it later as well. Just to ask if he was afraid that makeup would turn his son gay, because that's not how it works, and to point out that he's just playing and imitating. I wouldn't want to repeat this battle with dress up or play kitchens or baby dolls.