doula for #2?

mrs.mastro

DS#1 came as a total surprise 22 days early and fast.  I started having contractions at 4 p.m., didn't think I was actually in labor until around 8 p.m., water broke at 9 p.m., got to hospital at 10 p.m., born at 12:30 a.m.  DH was out of town, and my parents and sister were at the hospital with me.  All in all, it was a crazy blur, but everything went very smoothly.  I did get an epidural around 10:30 because I was only 3 cm and I thought it would be a long labor and I wasn't prepared with any natural labor techniques at all.  But I ended up getting to 10cm really quickly and started pushing around 12:15.

I do not want to get an epidural this time.  I still am not necessarily prepared for natural labor.  And DH has no clue.  But I just think that if this baby's delivery is like his brother's, I can handle it.  I am probably delusional though!  So I am thinking (if it's not too late) about getting a doula.  What do you ladies think?  I'm sure a doula would be beneficial, but how do I know if I can do it without one?

tokenhoser

Well, of course you CAN do it without a doula. You could do it without a doctor if you had to. Once you're having a baby, you're having a baby.

Personally, a doula is my favorite luxury.  She makes me feel calm, supported, and ready to face whatever happens. She also makes DH feel the same way.

mrs.mastro

tokenhoser:

Well, of course you CAN do it without a doula.

Okay, I do realize that. I just meant as sanely as possible.

SplashingFishy

We had a doula for #1. He was 16 days early and came fast (but not as fast as in your case). My water broke at 10:30 a.m., went to the hospital to be monitored, then went home to wait for labor to start (hadn't been feeling any contractions at that point). Then around 6p.m. or so, I started having contractions. We got to the hospital and he was born within an hour of getting to the hospital. All along, we would call the midwives periodically to check in and give status updates, but it was nice to have the doula to call as well. As it was, she was ready to come up to our house (DH SWORE that we were nowhere near the 4-1-1 ready to go to the hospital) since I was having VERY bad back labor. Instead, she got to the hospital right when she did. 

We decided to get a doula because we were expecting the long labor and delivery, and we were across the country from either of our families and hadn't met any new friends yet. We felt that a doula would be able to help support DH as well as me - if he wanted to take a nap or go for some food during the expected long hospital labor then she would have been there with me. I was really worried that he wouldn't take care of himself during labor and end up missing out on delivery.

As it was, she was there and was so warm and nurturing after delivery. She grabbed me some crackers, and even went with me and kept me company to the post-partum room while DH was with  DS in the nursery getting weighed and bathed. 

We plan on using a doula again. For me, I felt having a good doula there was preferable to having my mom or another friend there as it was just a better dynamic for me.  

As far as natural birth goes, I went in hoping/planning for a NB but totally open to intervention. With the back labor, I was in enough pain that had I got to the hospital and been 3cm I would've taken an epidural. As it was, I was too far along, and once we were able to get DS turned the pain seemed so much less in comparison. I did get sterile water injections though as we were trying to turn him. 

iumegan716

DS1's birth was super fast and easy.  I had a doula, though even she would admit that she didn't "do" very much (she was with us for an hour before DS was born).  It was definitely more of a peace of mind thing for me.  We hired her again for DS2, which some people said was crazy since presumably DS2's birth would be just as easy, if not easier.  As it turned out, DS2 arrived more quickly but it was a million times more painful.  I'm glad my doula was there, even though again, it was more so for my peace of mind.

mrsbhk22

I still had a doula with 3. I was in labor less than 2 hrs. Other than my car seat, it was the best money I spent in preparation for the baby. She was amazing and helped me stay focused when it all started happening super fast, after previous labors taking 24 hrs.