Child support direction

babymama619

I'm wondering if anyone can point me in the direction to figure out how the child support process works. 

I live in Illinois and the BD is working. After finding out I was pregnant I also found out he is married and lied to me about having a vasectomy. So the way I see it, he completely got himself into this position! Of course he is denied paternity and I have not hear from him in weeks.

I plan on filing for child support as soon as possible to make sure all my duck are in a row. So I'm really wondering do I wait until the baby is born? Are there steps I should take before hand? 

Croliner

I am starting the process in June and I'm due in September. By starting the process i mean going to my first lawyer appointment. People have advised me to start earlier that way if there are expenses, for example, complications at birth, you have your bases covered already. However, I have not talked to an actual lawyer about it yet. 

inthelost

wow he's a total and complete jerk! I wish I had answers for you, but i'm just as lost in the whole process too! definitely speak to a lawyer..even if it's just a consultation.

tig594

You may not need a lawyer.  I'd start with Friend of the Court first and see what they say.

livleen3

Im kinda in the same process but there are other things to consider. I say this because these are things I am considering for myself...

If you are going to get childsupport through the state they will first do a paternity test. Then his name will be on the birth certificate.  This may be stating the obvious but what I have been thinking about for myself is what if I want to get married to someone else. And if I am going to marry someone else in the future I would want my husband to adopt my daughter which could only happen if the father gives up his rights. This may not matter to you..But to me this does matter.  I don't know what type of father he will be to my daughter... So this is what I am doing and this could blow up in my face but I feel as though it could make things less complicated. I am going to ask him for $ without involving the courts (which he will agree to) and I am not going to write his name on the birth certificate (hopefully he wont throw a big fit about it) and Im going to wait for like a year and see what kind of father he is going to be. If hes not apart of the babies life in the first 2 years then Im going to move out of state and move on with my life. I live in a place where I don't have a support group so im not happy here. My child's happiness is important to me so im willing to stay here for her. I know noone can love her like her own father can and it would take a very special man to want to adopt her and make her his daughter.. So Im going to wait to see what happens..

 I know your situation is different but I just thought Id share with you what im thinking. I hope this kinda helps. And yes Im taking a big risk with trusting him in paying me etc. b/c he could simply dissapear. Also In my will and life insurance I have designated my brother anf close family members to be responsible for her if something were to happen to me...

I know you may need money from him but the less you can depend on him and move on with your own life the better for you!!

Good Luck Honey and send me a private message if you need!

mamastich

tig594:

You may not need a lawyer.nbsp; I'd start with Friend of the Court first and see what they say.

This and especially if monies tight. They have handled my divorce and all my custody And CS and it's been a godsend.