I'm having a hard time figuring out a nap and overall schedule for DS#2. With DS#1, DH was deployed or in the field for most of his life, so he was on a really strict schedule so that I got enough sleep and me time (especially being PG). Now that DH is home, and I have 2 kids, that same schedule doesn't make sense. There is no way that both kids can get good naps all day in their beds, we'd never leave the house. DS#1 is a very active toddler, so we have to have a playdate or outing everyday so he can burn off some energy. I also can't spend the same amount of time with #2 as I did with #1 teaching self-soothing, etc. My oldest would destroy the house.
How do you ladies do this so that both/all kids get enough sleep, but you're not trapped in the house, and there's still a little structure in their lives?