F/U Spoiled

xxbabycakesxx

I read all the responses in the original thread and wanted to thank everyone for their input.  So, thanks!  We definitely have room in our yard but theres a school playground nearby so thats why he thinks its a waste.  My parents can definitely afford it but I still told them to get the cheapest swing/slide set out there.  Anyways, I wanted to write a F/U and didn't want this to get buried in there.

So, DH and I just had a huge argument and, to think, this all started over a dumb swing set.  He mentioned a few things in our fight.  First, yes, its partly a pride thing as to why he won't accept the swing set from my parents.  Secondly, he said I should have enough respect to say "no" to my parents, even if they insist on getting my boys the swing set.  WTH, right?  Now I'm feeling like sht.  And finally, he says if in the future if we ever needed to borrow money from my parents, it would be like a slap in the face to them, since they just spent like $400 on our kids.  Then the fight turned into money issues.

I texted my dad that its a nice gesture but he shouldn't buy my boys the swing set and blahblah about borrowing money in the future.  He just texted back that he'd lend us any money if we ever needed it but hes still buying the swing set.  Thats exactly what I told DH my dad would say.  So now I don't know.  Ugh, whatever.

Blondangel

I'm sorry that this blew up into such a big thing, but it might be good that it brought about issues your H has regarding money. For the record, I think he's way off base and maybe should talk to someone about this stuff if you guys can't resolve it on

keags5496

Geez that bought up some stuff! I don't get the connection between the swing set and borrowing money later is either. If your parents want to help out and can then why shouldn't they be allowed to? Personally, my parents would think it was disrespectful

xxbabycakesxx

Blondangel:

I'm sorry that this blew up into such a big thing, but it might be good that it brought about issues your H has re

xxbabycakesxx

keags5496:

Geez that bought up some stuff! I don't get the connection between the swing set and borrowing money later is eith

GrayGhost13

::hugs:: It definitely sounds like this was about much, much more than the swing set. I'm sorry you guys had to have an argument, but honestly, sometimes it's blow-ups like this that get things out in the open so you can start talking them through prod

bosha711

I didn't post in the op, but I agree that it's a pride thing for YH, which sucks for your boys b/c I think they'd really enjoy the swingset.

But, I do think you & YH need to be in agreement on accepting the gift. Also, if YH is saying "no" to

kj07

I agree with the PPs.  Fights suck, especially fights that start out over something small (or at least not fight-worthy).  But it sounds like your H has larger concerns/anxiety about your financial situation as a family.  It's good that

kat81again2

a swing set might be a luxury but it's not a "spoiled" kind of item. It will not spoil your kids. And it will be very convenient for you to have them out there while you can do things around the house, frankly (maybe not right now, but in a year if you

xxbabycakesxx

bosha and mbenit- you guys do bring up good points about boundaries and setting precedents.  DH and I did have another discussion, only in a calm matter this time.  He said it'd be ok if my parents bought the swing set but he wants help build