To much to ask?

Linzala12

So I really need my MIL out of the picture OR doing some heavy self rebuilding. She is an alcoholic and I just can't take it anymore. Things are ALWAYS about her (which is part of the desease, I know) but if she can not stop drinking I will not allow her to see her grandkids.We have asked her not to drink while watching our DD, and that went unheard, so she does not stay at her house unless I am there. She aslo drinks infront of my recovering husband. My husband is a recovering alcoholic first and formost and while he was in early treatment my MIL would call me (which she never did prior) to tell me that she just can't deal with the fact that he is getting help and what will she do? WHAT WILL SHE DO?? Ummm...how about get the same help?? At my DD birthday party this past weekend she came in with tears in her eyes and boo hooing that I would not change the date of the party so her other son could attend. REALLY? I don't run on her time frame. While leaving she asked her BF to stop a bar once they got back into town. My DH is well aware of everything that I am thinking and feeling and says he will address these concerns with her. But am I being a hanass *** if I put my foot down and say its either"beer or your grandkids"?

I honnestly can not handle the "all about me" attitude on top of the constant drinking. It took everything in me to even invite her to DD birthday party bc I knew it was going to be the MIL show. My DH was livid with his mother, but has no clue how to address the issue, as it is very touchy for him. Any advice will be greatly appreciated. BC if DH does not handle it, I will, but I won't be nice about it.

Linzala12

It is sad that she still chooses it over her son who is battling a possible relapse everyday. She is a real piece of work and I am glad that DH has lived up to his mistakes and problem. Wish I could say the same for her. She is a waste of the good ai

daileym

I would give DH a timeline to figure out how he wants to handle it and let him know, if it hasn't been dealt with by a certain amount of time you will be dealing with it in your way and let him know what that is. 

My SIL is an alcoholic. She

Coll910

DH and I have cut his mother and father out of our lives, they are just horrible people that caused especially him nothing but stress. It's not something that someone really wants to have to do, but you do it if that's what is better for your family. We h

shakes

Linzala12:

It is sad that she still chooses it over her son who is battling a possible relapse everyday. She is a real piece o

SCtoDC

First - big props to your DH for getting help and moving into the 'recovering' side of alcoholism!  That is huge!

Second - I am the grandchild of two alcoholics (my dad's parents).  My dad sat down with my grandfather and said, "You'r

1026pumpkin

I agree with PPs.  You and DH need to get on the same page about what you would like your boundaries to be- maybe you could go to some Alanon meetings together to get some support for this, and then let him tell his mom what the rules are and what

angie244

i haven't spoken to my mother in 14 years since I was in college..I left home when i was 18 because she was an alcoholic and terribly abusive. I tried tokeep a relationship for two years but she just got worse and more abusive because she wasn't in contr

JAYA09

You have to think of your kids' safety first. My father was an alcoholic.  He took me to the local bar (small town) on several occasions and gave me quarters to play pool with the other patrons while he drank at the bar.  I was 10-12 in

Mitchellovesnemo

Sounds like you are coming to a cross road. Me personally would have a convo w/ her (sounds like you have had many) & let her know you arent going to tolerate it. From there SHE will make the decisions if she drinks & you will need to do whats bes

kimmykaye

I have 2 sisters with bad MIL situations:

1st sister: Her MIL was very controlling and an "all about me" personality.  She was also a heavy drinker.  This is when my sister and her dh were living near his mom in NY (they now live w