To be or not to be

MrsMalcontent

I have officially read too much on pregnancy/motherhood and I now now have no idea if I want children or not.

I hate other people's kids. Im not good at talking to them I find them dirty and gross. Ive been told its different when they're your own but googling "I hate my kids" says otherwise. Im worried it will drastically upset my married life in an unrepairable fashion. Im worried it will ruin all our fun.
On the other hand I want a legacy. I want to mold an awesome person who will be a lifelong friend to me like I am to my mom.

BUt then again he/she could grow up to hate me.

UGh! I feel like im in a good place to start a family married 5 years, paying on a house, a fair amount of savings and my degree... but im driving myself crazy trying to figure out if motherhood is something I want to do or just something society is making me think I want to do.

MrsMalcontent

DH is absolutely no help. His response to "should we?". I want to if you do but if you dont then I don't. Which is a long winded "whatever". Which is part of whats making me crazy. I feel like id be making the decision for him and he might hate me for it.

bumpuser794640

I think you are not ready to have kids yet, and it's possible that you may never want them or be ready to have them, and that's OK.  You don't have to decide right this minute, so I'd put baby thoughts on the back burner for now and revisit them when

CarolineEmma

I think if the only reason you want a child is to "mold a legacy" and have a special little bff, and if you truly find children repulsive, then having a child right now for you would probably not be the best decision. Your children aren't you, and if you

Kristinmo

Darbie914:

I don't think you're ready to procreate right now.  Yes, your love for your children is a love that you will n

MrsMalcontent

Those arent my only reasons to do it im just very bad at wording all the things rattling around in my head. I've been weighing pros and cons for a week.
Thank you guys for being straight with me my mother keeps telling me its just nerves and not to

magdalina.h

Honestly there are very few kids that I like. Most of them are just gross little monsters. That being said, I love Lucas more than life. It is totally different with him.

Mysterious_wife

magdalina.h:

Honestly there are very few kids that I like. Most of them are just gross little monsters. That being said, I love Luc

dragossoul84

I dont think raising a child is molding them you get to experiance their personality develop but you cannot make them what they are not. Some ways it does change your marriage. My husband and I have had to adjust parts of our relationship we cant take off

FemShep

OP, why not wait another year or two and see how you feel then?  Don't rush in to such a big decision, give yourself time to think about it.  And don't enforce an arbitrary deadline for a decision. take your time and decide on your schedule.

DLpanda08

I hope this doesn't come across as rude, but if you aren't sure whether you want kids or not then please DO NOT have a child.

Throughout all the years I have worked as a nanny I have seen several families where the parents had children because i