Not Shower Related, but Wedding Question

mdesmond2320

I will not be able to attend my best friend's wedding in June because I a due 3 days before the wedding (and live out of state).  I was talking with my mother about shower gifts and weddings gifts for my friend.  She said that since I can't attend the wedding I am not suppose to send money, but to send a gift from her registry.  I have already gotten her a vase and candlesticks for her shower in 2 weeks (both off registry as her registry was empty, I did make sure they were from a store she liked).  What is proper?  Do I send her a gift for the wedding itself (again not on registry) or should I send money? 

Thanks for the help! 

EastCoastBride

Send whatever you want!  Seriously.  Whether you go or don't go to the wedding, it doesn't matter if you give $$ or send an actual gift.  I've really never heard of etiquette getting down to this nitty-gritty level.  Maybe it does, but

1026pumpkin

I think sending money is fine.  If you feel weird about it, I would get her a gift card to the store she registered at or something from that store to make it easier in case she gets duplicates, etc.

mdesmond2320

EastCoastBride:

Send whatever you want!  Seriously.  Whether you go or don't go to the wedding, it doesn't matter if

rpalen29

send whatever you think it appropriate. If I were going to the shower, but not the wedding, I would of spent a little bit more on the shower gift, and not get them a wedding gift. 

Helenahhandbasket

I think sending whatever you want is fine and would be very thoughtful of you.

carlieanddanwedding

Honestly, gift cards and cash were some of my husband's and my most appreciated gifts; we appreciated everything we got, of course, but especially if their registry is empty, maybe it means they don't need that much stuff?  If you send cash/check, th

blondolphn

I agree with what a lot of people are saying. I generally give cash as wedding gifts so they can use it how they want, ie the big item they didn't get, honeymoon splurges etc. There is only one friend that I regretted doing that for (shotgun wedding), and

BallSox

It's safe to say that 90% of the worlds population is not going to be offended if you send money as a wedding present, regardless of the circumstances. 



Well, maybe that percentage would be lower if you included a note with the money

kennazebrowsky

Send whatever you want. It is nice you are even doing it since you wont be at the wedding. I highly doubt she will be upset to get money, who would be?