XP ntnp Woes possible m/c's mentioned

racheldcarrell

We decided to bench ourselves for a couple months. It was a pretty painful decision for me, but it makes sense. I have dental work that needs to get done, my ob, with whom we were going to start basic testing, is on mat leave, and scariest of all, my nephew was diagnosed with a rare form of downs syndrome that is genetic. This gene causes m/c's, and still birth, and can be passed for a few generations before showing up. My sister and I see the same doctor, and she thinks its possible I carry the gene as well, which would give me over 50 percent chance of having a child with downs syndrome, that is if I were able to carry to term. I know it may not be on our side of the family, but its still scary. DH suggested we start back up in May, which feels farther and farther away.

So now we have to reevaluate ttc. If my tests come back that I also have the gene, we have so much to think about. Can we afford a special needs child? What would his/her quality of life be? Can I handle the possibility of multiple m/c's or still birth? Can our relationship handle the stress? I know all this is a bit cart before horse, but I cant help but jump to worst case scenario.

Sorry for writing a novel here, I just needed to vent. Even though we wont technically be ttc, I still plan on hanging around the boards,if you'll have me, until we decide to start trying again, if we start trying again. I've found a wealth of information from this board, and know I can still learn from you.

katib77

I would say get the genetic testing and try not to worry until there is something to worry about. But maybe start researching about genetic testing and think about IVF with PGD to help ease your concerns??

MTDB

I can see how you feel overwhelmed. That's a lot to consider! But I'd try to take it one step at a time, starting with genetic testing. Hopefully you'll find out that you don't need to worry about most of these things (any more than any of us does!). And