September 2013 Moms

Grandpa doesn't want to know gender

Need some advice. When I was pg with DD, my dad didn't want to know the gender. Somehow, we all managed to keep it a secret from him. But EVERYONE else knew, including my stepmom! I wanted to honor my dad's wish to find out "the old fashioned way" but it was so hard to know and not say "she" when talking about baby. In the end, he thought it was a boy and was totally surprised. This time around, he wants to be surprised again. But DH and I just don't have the spirit to play the game. So how do we let him down? We were going to do a gender reveal cake at DD's bday party in June, so it would be a surprise to all of our family members. Is that a good replacement to finding out at birth?

PS - During my baby shower with DD (that my stepmom threw for me), my dad went outside during the gift opening so he didn't see any of the stuff!!!!  And after DD's room was ready, my dad couldn't see it because the colors would give it away.



 

  

Re: Grandpa doesn't want to know gender

  • I guess since he's the only one who wants it this way, it's kind of his responsibility to deal with it himself.

    Tell him you have plans that you're really excited about and want him to participate in, but if he doesn't want to, you're not going t

    BFP #1 - Mango - 6/11/12, EDD 2/22/12 Natural MC 7/15/12
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  • imageravenclaw1:

    I guess since he's the only one who wants it this way, it's kind of his responsibility to deal with it himself.</p



     

      
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  • That seems like a bit of a ridiculous request to me. It's not his baby and he should be able to go with the flow and respect the parent's decision to find out or not. I would not be going to great lengths to keep the gender from anyone, and would certainl
    Dailey 10/29/2009 BFP! 7/12/2010 Welcomed our beautiful baby boy TTC#2 Since 10/2011 5/21/2012 BFP! 6/30/2012 Missed Miscarriage 1/4/2012 BFP!! Stick, baby, stick! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFetus Ticker
  • Also, think about if it were reversed and you didn't want to know the gender but he did. He would just have to wait. I think it's sad that he would make you feel like he was disappointed. 
    Dailey 10/29/2009 BFP! 7/12/2010 Welcomed our beautiful baby boy TTC#2 Since 10/2011 5/21/2012 BFP! 6/30/2012 Missed Miscarriage 1/4/2012 BFP!! Stick, baby, stick! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFetus Ticker
  • Well, I would just tell your dad what your plans are for the gender reveal and that everyone else will know the sex again, and she what he says.  If he wants to run out of the room everytime someone mentions the baby, that's his perogative, but you a
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  • Yeah you should be able to go about your business if he doesn't want to know let him go the lengths to keep it a secret.
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  • My Dad doesn't want to know either. We found out today that we are having a boy. My Dad is the only one that thinks we are having a boy and he is soooo excited to have a grandson... We are planning a gender reveal party for our family and close friends

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  • Ya know what, too bad. DD will probably tell him anyway.
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  • Hopefully he will appreciate the lengths you went to the keep it a surprise for him the first time and will understand when you tell him you'd like it to be different this time.  Telling him that might be tough but I think you'll feel better once

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  • imagemrsalishiaaustin:

    My Dad doesn't want to know either. We found out today that we are having a boy. My Dad is the only one that



     

      
  • imageJennM205:

    Hopefully he will appreciate the lengths you went to the keep it a surprise for him the first time and will understa



     

      
  • Short answer:
    I agree w/pp who said if he doesn't want to know, it's his issue and he's the one that needs to go out of the way to avoid finding out.   Let him know your plans, but don't go out of your way to keep from telling him.  Or tel

    Boy 10.6.13
    Labored at freestanding birth center using hypnobirthing techniques
    Delivered via csection
  • Thanks for the advice ladies! I know its ridiculous. That's why I hope he likes the gender reveal idea. Its still a surprise to everyone at the same time. At first, DH and I were going to wait and find out then too, but that's a whole MONTH after the a



     

      
  • I guess I sort of disagree with the others. I don't know why it would be rude of him to ask you to not come out and tell him. If he doesn't want to know, why does he have to justr because you do? I kind of think it is inconsiderate of you to want to fo

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  • imageBrooke81:
    I guess I sort of disagree with the others. I don't know why it would be rude of him to ask you to not come out and tell
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  • Tell him to do this:

    image

    Problem solved!

    imageimageimage

    image

  • LCassLCass member

    imagemagdalina.h:
    Ya know what, too bad. DD will probably tell him anyway.

    Very good point.  If h

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  • Let DD slip, he can't be mad at her..."PopPop..or whatever..I'm gonna have a baby sister". Just too stinkin cute coming from a kid.
    MC: 11/2009 at 8 weeks DD: Born 04/2011 Due 9/22/2013
  • It's not rude for him to WANT it.  It IS rude for him to expect the parents and everyone else to watch everything they way about the baby whenever he is around b/c he wants something different from what the parents want.
    Boy 10.6.13
    Labored at freestanding birth center using hypnobirthing techniques
    Delivered via csection
  • I'm in the camp of 'it's a surpise whenever you find out, whether at 20 weeks or 40'. That being said, I have to say situations like this always make me think the same thing; someone is trying to control something that is not even about them. Unless you a

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  • Yep, tell DD and let her tell your dad. He wont be mad with her. Or disappointed. My sister did this, much worse though, because my BIL didn't want to find out but my sis just orchestrated it so my niece would talk about her 'little brother' and it was ou
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  • imagePrettyInPearls23:

    Tell him to do this:

    image

    Problem solved



     

      
  • imageDarbie914:
    imageBrooke81:</


     

      
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