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Parenting after a Loss
mork
member
Crying in the Shower
mork
member
I broke down in the shower. It's the beginning of the hell that will be tomorrow.
It's my Mama's birthday tomorrow. The first without her. It's just not fair. It's not fair that she died just three months before my beautiful little girl arrived. She never got to hold her or talk to her. I didn't get to see her smile the first time she laid eyes on her. We never got to talk about the red curly hair and blue eyes she got, just as my Mom had dreamed. I can't just call and tell her how the day is going or ask her questions during the rough times. I can still see and hear her in my mind, but it's not the same, and it's fading. F you universe. F you.
It's my Mama's birthday tomorrow. The first without her. It's just not fair. It's not fair that she died just three months before my beautiful little girl arrived. She never got to hold her or talk to her. I didn't get to see her smile the first time she laid eyes on her. We never got to talk about the red curly hair and blue eyes she got, just as my Mom had dreamed. I can't just call and tell her how the day is going or ask her questions during the rough times. I can still see and hear her in my mind, but it's not the same, and it's fading. F you universe. F you.
Mama to 5 angel babies, 1 rainbow baby, and 2 more angel babies.
My beautiful Ella/ToT arrived 10/10/12.
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Re: Crying in the Shower
After 7 years of no ovulation...
BFP#1 10/24/11 ~ EDD 6/29/12 ~ Natural m/c 11/2/11
BFP#2 2/3/12 ~ Alice born 9/26/12
My Life
BFP 7.7.09 - CVS 9.10.09 (Girl) - 9.24.09 Severe Fatal Malformation - D&E 10.7.09 @ 17wks
BFP 6.1.10 - 6.10.10 Ectopic M/C @ 5wks
BFP 10.26.10 - 10.29.10 CP
BFP 1.30.11 - CVS 3.28.11 (Girl) - EDD 10.11.11 - Born 10.6.11
BFP 12.18.12 - 12.20.12 CP
BFP 3.18.13 - CVS 5.21.13 (Girl) - EDD 12.2.13 - Born 11.24.13
BFP 6.10.14 - CVS 7.2.14 (Girl) - EDD 1.12.15 - Born sleeping 8.6.14 @ 17w5d
BFP #1 5/4/11 EDD 1/12/12 natural m/c 5/17/11
BFP #2 8/9/11 EDD 4/18/12 ectopic pregnancy (methotrexate) 8/24/11 ruptured tube and removal 8/29/11
BFP #3 3/9/12 EDD 11/19/12 Logan born 11/18/12
~*~*Everyone Welcome*~*~
BFP#2 2.5.11 (EDD 10.15.11) DS born 9.28.11
BFP#4 8.27.13 (EDD 5.6.14) DD born 4.23.14
My Recipe Blog
~All AL'ers welcome~
BFP #1 6.19.11 ~ EDD 2.23.12 ~ CP on 6.22.11
BFP #2 7.23.11 ~ EDD 3.28.12 ~ MC on 8.16.11
BFP #3 11.17.11~ EDD 7.31.12 ~ MC on 1.18.12
BFP #4 4.12.12 ~ EDD 12.25.12~ Born on 12.26.12
TTC since 11/2009; Lap/HSG/Hysteroscopy: 5/2011 (endometriosis - removed; endocervical polyp - removed; high pressure in bilateral tubes - cleared)
BFP #1: 8/4/11; DS1 born sleeping on 11/16/11 at 19w1d
BFP # 2: 5/7/12, EDD 1/10/13, DS2 born 1/4/13
BFP # 3: 11/8/13, EDD 7/17/14, mmc 10wks
BFP # 4: 5/16/14, EDD 1/15/15, praying for our 2nd rainbow baby
Thinking of you today. Huge virtual hugs to you.
BFP #1 9-22-10 Missed M/c 10-18-10 D&E 10-28-10
BFP #2 5-9-11 EDD 1-12-12 Audrey Rachel born 1-12-12
BFP #3 9-21-13 EDD 5-30-14
BFP#2 ~ 8/2/11, EDD 4/11/12, D&C 9/12/11 at 9w5d
BFP#3 ~ 4/15/12, EDD 12/21/12 ~ DD born 12/22/12
BFP #1 5/2010 - Missed m/c at 8 weeks
BFP #2 2/2011
Baby G welcomed with love and relief 10/2011
Surprise BFP 1/8/2013...say what? Baby A arrived 9/2013
Motherhood is not for wimps
BFP#1 10 wk missed mc
BFP#2 DS born at 40+2 on 8/14/12 BFP#3 DD Born at 39+3 on 5/13/14
((((Huge Hugs))))
I'm so sorry.. much of the time, life doesn't seem fair
Thinking of you...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Siggy Warning~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
((hugs)) I wish there were something I could say, but I know there isn't. It just sucks and it isn't fair. I'm so sorry, I wish I could give you a huge bear hug. I know what you are saying about her voice, It's only been 4 months and I feel like I can'
Sending you so many hugs, thoughts, and prayers... I lost my mom while pregnant with Ben, and it is the suckiest thing in the universe. I am so sorry that you are feeling this pain, and that you have to go through this journey without her. I truly unde
Huge, huge (((hugs)))!!! It's not fair at all. I hope you find a way to celebrate her tomorrow and that the day goes as good as it can.
I lost my dad and brother and even though it's been 8 years it's still such a struggle sometimes, especi
bfp#2 2/14/11? cerclage placed at 13 weeks
?DS 9/29/11 36 wks 3 days 8lb 20 1/4" ?
bfp#3 12/15/12 CP 12/27/12
bfp#4 2/25/13
beta#1 51 beta#2 163 beta#3 1,370
BFP #2 11/3/10; BO at u/s 10w6d 12/16/10; Natural MC 1/7/11; D&C 4/21/11
BFP #3 10/27/11 Please stick, LO!! 2/6/12 It's a Girl! Alexis Grace born 6/29/12
BFP#4 4/27/14 Stick, stick, stick!! 8/11/14 It's a Boy! Evan Wesley born 1/8/15
"Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow, that is patience." Let it Be (blog) ♥ My BFP Charts
This time I'm not leaving without you.
Rylan 1/27/2011, 2:42 pm, 5lbs 12oz, 18.5 inches long
Ayla 10/02/2013, 10:14 am, 6lbs 14oz, 19.25 inches long
Missed Miscarriage 6w3d 3/02/2010
I'll hold you in my heart until I hold you in heaven.
The day went alright. DH, DD and I went to an Olive Mill my Mom liked and then I tried to stay busy when he went to work. After DD went to bed I made artichokes and watched Dancing with the Stars. It's something my Mom and