Baby Showers

Why the eff do people always ask this?

Since I first announced my pregnancy, people have asked, "are you gonna have a shower?" as in throwing myself one. Then they act all weird if I explain that you don't just get pregnant and throw yourself a big gift getting party. I'm telling you I seriously had like the 10th person ask me about this. I can't even tell you all the weird questions I have had that basically imply that I am going to throw myself a shower.  What gives? Am I missing something?! Is it becoming more common for people to throw themselves a shower??? People are treating me like I am nuts over this, or like it's weird for me to wait around about "having a shower".  I am just like... if I get a shower I get one, if I don't oh well.  Then they just kind of act put off. WTF dude. MIL is going to throw me one which is sweet. I am glad now I can just answer that question with "my mother in law is throwing me one".

 

anybody else get asked this stupid (IMO) question? Just curious because I couldn't believe I got asked again today!

Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml

Re: Why the eff do people always ask this?

  • I got asked about it when I first told people we were PG. It was awkward for me and I just said "I don't know". 

    Since then, my mom's friend has offered to throw one, so when people ask, I usually say that my mom's friend has offered. I am due in early August so I say it will likely be in June or July.  


     Anniversary
    When you've been married this long, you need a ticker to remind you.

    Baby Boy M - 08/01/2013 

    Expecting Baby Bean February 2017
  • imagecinderin:

    I got asked about it when I first told people we were PG. It was awkward for me and I just said "I don't know". 

    Since then, my mom's friend has offered to throw one, so when people ask, I usually say that my mom's friend has offered. I am due in early August so I say it will likely be in June or July.  

    Yeah, I mean I thought it was common etiquette to not throw yourself a shower, so why would people bother to ask??? weird.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Loading the player...
  • imagebrenanigans:
    imagecinderin:

    I got asked about it when I first told people we were PG. It was awkward for me and I just said "I don't know". 

    Since then, my mom's friend has offered to throw one, so when people ask, I usually say that my mom's friend has offered. I am due in early August so I say it will likely be in June or July.  

    Yeah, I mean I thought it was common etiquette to not throw yourself a shower, so why would people bother to ask??? weird.

    who knows. People ask the weirdest sh!t.

    We told our families on Christmas about being PG. I felt like crap, horrible MS.

    So I laid down for a little while after opening presents (we surprised them with the present).  

    I drag myself back out for dinner (looking and feeling like crap). I sit down next to MIL's BFF who says "congratulations". I say "thank you". 

    The next question out of her mouth? "was it planned?".

    Seriously?

    After that - "how long did it take you?"

    Seriously!

    I would much rather have the shower questions...  


     Anniversary
    When you've been married this long, you need a ticker to remind you.

    Baby Boy M - 08/01/2013 

    Expecting Baby Bean February 2017
  • omg don't get me started on the "was it planned" question!!!!  "no I failed sex ed."  Indifferent
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imagebrenanigans:
    omg don't get me started on the "was it planned" question!!!!  "no I failed sex ed."  Indifferent

    no sh!t. DH and I have been married more than 8 years. We are 31 years old. Do you think we just got "lucky" we didn't get PG before now?

    I could see people wondering if it was planned if we were younger or still in school or unmarried or unemployed, etc. Otherwise, wouldn't you just assume it was planned? 


     Anniversary
    When you've been married this long, you need a ticker to remind you.

    Baby Boy M - 08/01/2013 

    Expecting Baby Bean February 2017
  • DH and I have 2 kids and aer expecting twins in September. I get asked the following questions weekly:

    Are they natural? (I am assuming they are wondering about if we used IF treatments which we didnt) I answer, "no they are robot children" (I am over being nice and have resorted to sarcasm)

    Arent you going to be busy? Oh no, I am going to have all the free time in the world. Kids take care of themselves.

    Are you going to have a shower? Umm why have a shower? We have 95% of what we need already from the first two pregnancies and we just bought the car seats and are stockpiling diapers. Whats left you ask? Cribs and bedding which we wont need right away.

  • imageJocelynB0911:

    DH and I have 2 kids and aer expecting twins in September. I get asked the following questions weekly:

    Are they natural? (I am assuming they are wondering about if we used IF treatments which we didnt) I answer, "no they are robot children" (I am over being nice and have resorted to sarcasm).

    My BFF had twins and she regularly got this question. I was shocked that people she didn't know (like seriously the cash register guy at Cosi) felt it was okay for them to ask this question. Just sooooo rude. I like the robot response. 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • A few people have asked me that but I don't take it as if they are asking if I'm throwing myself one. My mother is throwing my shower.. So that's what I tell them.
    Lilypie Maternity tickers

    <3 Mama to 2 girls - H&I <3
  • I guess I don't automatically assume they think I'm throwing myself one.  When people asked me that, I pretty much said I hoped so but it was still pretty early in my pregnancy and I'd let them know if I heard of anyone planning anything.  
  • I think the most repetetive question I was asked was "what do you REALLY REALLY want off of your registry?"
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • image526SadieSadie:
    I think the most repetetive question I was asked was "what do you REALLY REALLY want off of your registry?"


    That was the most uncomfortable question for me. I never knew what to answer.

     image 

       

  • I think they're just asking if there will be a shower for you, regardless of who hosts. People might react strangely because the way you're phrasing it sounds like "No one's offered to throw me one yet" which kinda puts the person who asked in an awkward position, as if they should offer to organize one for you. A more polite response might be "none planned at the moment." 
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • imageAAA024:
    image526SadieSadie:
    I think the most repetetive question I was asked was "what do you REALLY REALLY want off of your registry?"


    That was the most uncomfortable question for me. I never knew what to answer.


    This! After the first five people asking me this, I just said "well you don't need to get anything, but since you're insisting diapers are always good." I felt like that was the best response and it let people know that I didn't expect anything and at my shower I was really appreciative of everything I got.
  • I actually never got asked that.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • "Thanks for your interest, but I am not having a shower."
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Little Man (4 years old---holy cow)
    He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be.  He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.  
  • I just said, "If someone offers to throw me one, I'll make sure they know you are on the guest list..."

     I think this question can also come out of people not knowing if they would be invited to such a thing, because it can be harder to know if you are really close with someone these days. You might feel close to them, but they might not feel as close to you... Of, if you have family like I do, on my side, we never talk but still feel very close with each other. On hubby's side, if we don't talk, they get all freaked out that we aren't close. Since hubby and I both fall on the not talking as much side, some of his family peeps get really worried about where they stand with us and whether we feel close to them or not. We should talk more, probably.

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"