When did it get easier for you?

victorias176

My twins are almost ten months (actual age) but born one month premature. They are close to crawling but for the most part still stationary. They can't hold their bottles but will feed themselves cheerios, puffs, Mum Mums, etc. No teeth.

I'm really struggling with how difficult everything is. I just thought it would be easier by this point. My husband and I are just constantly running out of energy and patience. With them and each other.

I know I probably shouldn't wish this but I do wish they could crawl because I feel like they are so unhappy alllllll the time. Why do they always cry/fuss/scream? Why can't they just be little happy sweet things? For the last ten months I have been constantly telling myself it will get easier. For a few months in the 6-8 mo range it did feel better but now with transitioning them to only formula, plus mixing in real food, plus teething, mobility - you name it! Geez it's so overwhelming and exhausting. I feel awful saying this but sometimes I'm so jealous of people with one baby who are already planning on what to put in their baby's first Easter basket. I don't have time to go to the bathroom an extra time during the day much less even figure out what kind of gifts I should be buying them a month from now. I feel like they should be buying ME gifts for getting screamed at 24/7 and still not 100% sleeping through the night!

GoMaltby18

Out of curiosity, you said you are transitioning to only formula...does that mean you are weaning?  I had a really hard time right around 9-10 months with both of my sons and realized later that a lot of my attitude/frustration/depression had to do with night weaning and the return of my period.  Everything seemed so hard and I was always on my husband's case too.  

I haven't done it with twins (yet) but all those transitions make for a difficult stage.  Hopefully they outgrow it soon and things get better for you. 

Temp123197812503460

honestly, not until around a year or 13 monbths when they started sleeping at night more.  And then only a little bit.

At a year and a half it is finally starting to be more manageable.  

amy1007

Im still waiting and mine are 17m. But obviously having an almost 3yo does not help. There are always hard stages.

chickaboo1974

Honestly, It was easy for me from 12wks (they started STTN) to about 15 months - when they started climbing on everything.  Now they can't be out of my eye sight or they are climbing the bookcase, on top of the TV console, in the windows etc.  So mobility is a new challenge.

macchiatto

I have to admit, I've had many points (including after they turned 4 just recently) where I've found myself thinking, "I thought it would be easier by now!"
I think some of that varies with what your kids are like, how they get along and what issues they have.

I did feel like it got somewhat easier at 2m when they developed more of a nap schedule, and again at 4.5m when they started STTN. The stage you're at was tough for us (though I've heard other say they thought 5 or 6 to 12m was easy) because of all the teething, fussiness, frustration w/not being as mobile as they wanted to be, etc. And yes, I was definitely jealous of those with one baby and all the things they took for granted! (True too with young toddlers when I couldn't do simple things like take them to the playground or zoo by myself.)

I felt like it got more fun after they turned 1. I think 12 to 18ish months was a lot of fun. Since then I feel like it gets harder and easier again in little bursts; an easier couple of days, then a tough week, then an easier week, then a tough couple of days, etc. The challenges just keep changing as they get older; certain things get easier while new challenges emerge.

MuseumMaven

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. No one understands like a twin mom!

It's hard to say when it gets easier because babies are all different. My babies were extremely difficult as newborns and it continually got easier, but I have friends who thought the newborn /infant stage was much easier than toddlerhood. My extremely difficult infants have turned into delightful toddlers.

I found that at that age my boys were much happier if we got out of the house. More than once, on a bad day, I would just decide, "That's it! We're going out!" and we'd head to the mall, Target, the zoo, anyplace! The change of scenery did us all good.

Hang in there you can do this!

LewisTwins

It got easier when a trio of things happened. STTN, eating every 23 hours instead of every hour, and able to sit up/crawl/stand on their own. The indepence was a game changer for them. It's still very tiring, and requires a butt load of patience, but I'm not tearing my hair out anymore. Instead they're doing it for me.

The STTN, was a big challenge, and took some difficult choices as we did CIO, but it's paid off. We're all getting more sleep, and we're all happier for it.

Good luck.

victorias176

You guys are all so kind. I should come on here to read more often. I guess I'm just coming to the realization that this is hard where up until now I've been able to convince myself it's not that bad.  

I can tell that mobilization is on the horizon and I do hope that improves some of the situation although I can definitely understand the additional problems that will bring along. Whoever said eating once every 24 hours instead of every hour must have a video camera in my house because I can't WAIT for those days!!! I've usually fed them both four times before I can even think about getting something to eat myself. It's like they get bored of eating before they get full and they will love one thing one day and hate it the next. STTN is so-so. I just try not to complain because it's so much better than it was before. 

 Just knowing someone else understands goes a long way.

huntertwin

Mine are the same age as yours, except they are very mobile. It was easier to take care of them before they started crawling everywhere! Now I feel like I save their lives several times a day. They crawl lightning fast, constantly find things to put in their mouths, try to pull themselves up on furniture, and manage to hurt themselves a hundred times a day (not seriously of course). But I second what PP said, take them out of the house, they become so much more manageable. However fussy mine are, they get giddy with glee when I put them in their stroller and walk around the neighborhood, or take them to Target or whatever. It makes everything better (and saves your sanity!).

Jen0204

It got easier for us when they started STTN (around 9.5 months), which was also right around when they started crawling. I feel like those are two huge milestones. Everyone said to me "enjoy it while they can't go anywhere, life will be so much harder when they're mobile" and I couldn't disagree with that more. It's so much easier now that they can come and go as they please. Sure, we're constantly childproofing because each week it seems like they can reach something new, but overall it's SO much more fun and so much easier. 

Our biggest obstacle now is the lack of communication. You can tell they want to say things but they can't and they get really mad about that sometimes. I think each stage will have different obstacles but the last couple of months have just been a blast! 

violaplayer

Honestly, I don't think it ever really gets easier. It's just that challenge changes. First there is eating and sleeping. Then moving. Then discipline and developmental. Then potty training.

 

Hang in there, it does get better and more fun!