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Making progress!

ambrvanambrvan member
in Blended Families
Ok, so this may not be a big deal, but the relief I feel over this small step is wonderful.

I had another session with my therapist yesterday. Yesterday had been particularly rough, even though I only spent the morning with the kids and then went to work all day. So I went armed with plenty of frustration and stress. He said my homework until next time was to work on asking for help and change my point of view when I do need help. Asking for help, say with the kids, does not mean I am a bad a parent.

So I asked my H to get up this morning and help get the kids ready and take them to school and daycare. No fuss, no groaning. Just, ok. I was shocked. So I started waking the kids up, but completely let DH get them ready from start to finish while I ate breakfast. Then they all came in and ate with me.

This morning is the first happy nonweekend morning I can remember. The kids were happy. There was no crying, no yelling, no harping, nothing bad at all. It was so peaceful!

Now it wasn't easy for me. I was drumming my fingers on the table trying not to tell DH what they should wear, what order to do things in, which toothbrush and toothpaste they use. He knows all of this, is completelylet capable, and last year when I had to be at work before the kids could go to school, he took care of this everyday no problem.

So, baby steps of progress made for the control freak who has been making herself and her family miserable.
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Re: Making progress!

  • KTdiditKTdidit member
    Congrats thats great! I know how you feel, wanting to tell someone else how to do something with your kids. I have to stop myself from doing to to FH all the time when he is heloing my DS do something. A littel help and less stress is worth a few non matching outfits Smile
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  • Amanda88Amanda88 member
    We all have to start somewhere, and it is important to celebrate small victories. This is a good sign, and I am happy you are making good progress. I hope everything continues the way it is going. Congrats!
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  • lb1212lb1212 member

    Congrats! 

    I, too am a tad OCD when it comes to parenting. I'm using a basket system.

     

    Basket A - Things that are super important! Examples - Safety issues or DS watching shows with "adult content".

    Basket B - Things that need to get done, just not necessarily right now. Examples - DS missing a bath because they are watching TV or DS not eating veggies for dinner.

     Basket C - Things that don't matter! Examples - Matching clothes or wearing tennis shoes to church.

     

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