My troubled friend K

pennysuedog

Just some updates, I can't talk about it IRL, and I hate having secrets so you gals are my outlet...

Rumors are going around work that K was passed out on the bathroom floor Friday.  I asked K about it and she said that she is so tired because she is having anxiety and panic attacks at night.  Sleeping on her break is her solution.  She says the breakroom is to noisy and there are too many people looking at her and her car is too cold.  So she curls up on the bathroom floor.

She stopped seeing her therapist because she felt she was getting nowhere with him.  I really do not think that was a good move.  Now she confessed to me that she has been cutting herself.  This didn't surprise me I have seen the marks and already guessed this.

She claims to be sober now for a week and a half.  I believe her.   She went to the hospital emergency room last week because she was having a panic attack.  They wanted to commit her to a 10 day program and she slipped out the door before they could start the paper work.  She thinks 10 days will not do her any good.  She then visited her regular Doctor  and he prescribed antidepressants and sleeping medication.  She says it is not helping, although she seemed in a better mood Saturday.

We had lunch outside work this week...We talked about her rape, the sexual assault that happened after that, and then numerous drunken hook ups.  This is what sparked her decline/addictions.

After the rape she was so bruised her parents took her to the emergency room and they took pictures.  She even knew the guy's name.  The case did not make it to court because she was told "she didn't say no loud enough"   I can not believe this *** goes on in America. Truly sad.

I know she is living a very risky lifestyle but "no" no matter how it is said means no.  She has tremendous shame and really does feel she deserved the rape.   We have a mutual friend who is also privy to the situation.  This mutual friend told her that she was asking for it because she was so drunk. This pissed me off.  WTH was she thinking.

I also told you about her tryoing to commit suicide.  I guess she has tried 3 times in the past.  

If you saw this girl in passing you would never guess what is going on.  She is beautiful and put together.  She holds down a job and works hard.

 

 

 

missyishere

That poor girl.  It's no wonder victims don't come forward... That makes me incredibly sad for her, truly.  No one deserves to be raped, and the mutual friend belittling her experience should have really kept her mouth shut.  I really hope your friend receives the help she desperately needs.  It sounds like she's awful close to a very dangerous position. 

pennysuedog

missyleaferg:

That poor girl.  It's no wonder victims don't come forward... That makes me incredibly sad for her, truly.  No one deserves to be raped, and the mutual friend belittling her experience should have really kept her mouth shut.  I really hope your friend receives the help she desperately needs.  It sounds like she's awful close to a very dangerous position. 

I think she is reaching a turning point.  She is so tired of living this way she is and wants change, she is just scared of it.  I just wish she would take what is being offered instead of holding out to see if anything better comes along.

 

AngLK987

Oh jeez, poor thing has been through so much. I wish that I had some advice for you, but I've never been in your situation. I'm certain that just being a listening ear for her is helpful and that she appreciates it so much. Maybe offer to go with her to talk to someone about the rape case, maybe finding someone who could listen and do something about bringing the person to justice would help give her some closure on the horrifying memory.  As much as possible I would encourage her to do the 10 day treatment, it may seem like too much now, but they may be able to give her more coping skills vs. just medicating her - which would give her twice the ammunition to fight the thoughts of suicide and depression.  Many clients I worked with did much better after learning some coping skills or just having someone to talk to, it could definitely help curb the risky behaviors.  Good luck Penny, please keep us posted on her, My thoughts and prayers are with your friend that she can overcome all of this

dlast09

Wow, how sad. And wtf to your mutual friend?! 

mrsgabus

I have never had a drug or alcohol addiction so I cannot say I understand in any way except that My father and Ex were drug addicts , One of which is still a current addict. 

I can relate to her in the rape department as well as the "justice" not served. I was raped twice when I was a teenager. Once when I was 14 from a friend, who I charged and it was "dropped" a year later. Then again at 16 when I went to a party with a friend (my buddy system) and she failed. I have no clue who he was and I woke up in a very bad part of town.I led a horrible lifestyle at a very young age.

I hope she knows that she is not alone and that she obviously has you to help her along the way 

I can understand her pain, her frustration and anxiety. I hope and pray that she can overcome all of it and get to the place that she deserves to be.   Wanting help is the first step and I hope that she can get into a treatment soon. 

anothwer WTF to your mutual friend  

pennysuedog

mrsgabus:

I have never had a drug or alcohol addiction so I cannot say I understand in any way except that My father and Ex were drug addicts , One of which is still a current addict. 

I can relate to her in the rape department as well as the "justice" not served. I was raped twice when I was a teenager. Once when I was 14 from a friend, who I charged and it was "dropped" a year later. Then again at 16 when I went to a party with a friend (my buddy system) and she failed. I have no clue who he was and I woke up in a very bad part of town.I led a horrible lifestyle at a very young age.

I hope she knows that she is not alone and that she obviously has you to help her along the way 

I can understand her pain, her frustration and anxiety. I hope and pray that she can overcome all of it and get to the place that she deserves to be.   Wanting help is the first step and I hope that she can get into a treatment soon. 

anothwer WTF to your mutual friend  

I'm so sorry.  

mrsgabus

pennysuedog:

mrsgabus:

I have never had a drug or alcohol addiction so I cannot say I understand in any way except that My father and Ex were drug addicts , One of which is still a current addict. 

I can relate to her in the rape department as well as the "justice" not served. I was raped twice when I was a teenager. Once when I was 14 from a friend, who I charged and it was "dropped" a year later. Then again at 16 when I went to a party with a friend (my buddy system) and she failed. I have no clue who he was and I woke up in a very bad part of town.I led a horrible lifestyle at a very young age.

I hope she knows that she is not alone and that she obviously has you to help her along the way 

I can understand her pain, her frustration and anxiety. I hope and pray that she can overcome all of it and get to the place that she deserves to be.   Wanting help is the first step and I hope that she can get into a treatment soon. 

anothwer WTF to your mutual friend  

I'm so sorry.  

No need for sorry's, I was just hoping you would pass on that shes not alone and that there are people that understand where she is at. I went through My hard times but  your friend has had it worse. I can only imagine how badly she feels inside. 

I am sorry for whats she has been through, Noone deserves to have that much pain.