There's a discussion going on on my FB BMB about when to let kids start having a boyfriend/dating. Someone's 11 year old (who was not supposed to be having a boyfriend) had this bf break up with her and was upset. The mom is saying she wants her kid to focus on being a kid and there's plenty of time for dating when she's older, etc.
Obviously, I don't have kids this age yet, but I remember how my parents handled this with me. They didn't object to my boyfriend when I was 11 (we barely spoke to each other, it's not like it was a "relationship"). They did give me one rule in high school and that was that I was not allowed to date a senior when I was a freshman. So of course I did! And I picked a total winner too (the guy was seriously into drugs, etc). But the point is, they made up an arbitrary rule that was pretty unenforceable unless they were going to keep me in the house 24/7. Why bother?
And the thing that really bugs me is that this mom in my group is saying "focus on being a kid" etc which is nice and logical and as adults, we get it, but your kid is not going to grasp that. Especially not your pre-teen. The one time I went to my mom with boy troubles, she gave me a line like that about how I shouldn't be focusing on boys right now, and it pretty much ruined our relationship for the next decade or so.
So. Did you having dating rules growing up? Did you follow them? Will you set rules for your kids?
BFP#1: 01/10, M/C 6w
BFP#2: 06/10, M/C 5w
BFP#3: 09/10, DS born June 1, 2011
BFP#4: 07/12, M/C 5w3d
BFP#5: 12/12, EDD 08/18/13
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