Anyone have experience with stage 3 or 4 cancer?

KateLouise

I know that no two experiences are the same but I guess I'm just trying to get some insight.

My MIL has bowel cancer. It's stage 3 and possibly stage 4 (It's definitely in some lymph nodes and there's a growth in the lung but at this stage they're unsure if it's related to the cancer or not)

MIL has an appointment with the oncologist on Tuesday and DH is going with her. 

I suppose my big question is how do they determine if the growth in the lung is related to the cancer? She's had CT and MIR scans which could see it but not determine the nature of it.

I don't really know what I'm asking of you guys. It seems like MIL really can't catch a break. DH's dad/her husband died some years ago at a reasonably young age, after years of illness.

Anyone supported someone through this kind of thing?

Thanks ladies 

ToastieSimons

I had a stage 1 cancer.  There is a lot of bloodworm to check for cancerous blood cells, they can do other scans to see if the tumor has a blood flow, they can just track it to see if it grows.cancerous rumors grow very quickly.

i'm so sorry you're MIL is going through this.   

jesstellina

Sorry your MIL and family are going through such a tough time.   I've only seen people go through this from the professional side as a (very new) doctor, never personal. How fast things will progress and what treatments will be available & feasible will depend on a lot of very specific things that only an oncologist can determine. The way they'll see if the lung growth is related would be through a biopsy. Sometimes lung biopsies can be done using a bronchoscope, which is a small flexible camera put down into the airway while the patient is partially sedated. Otherwise it may need to be a more invasive procedure; that would depend on the location of the lesion.

My advice from what I've seen would be for her to get as much information as she can from her providers so that she understands what's going on, and also for her to frequently re-assess what her goals of treatment are. I think patients often get taken down a road of invasive, painful, costly treatments that aren't really what they want. At times doctors can assume that patients and their families want to pursue every treatment available and can get carried away.

I hope that helped a little bit. 

aglenn

So sorry to hear about your MIL. My father died of pancreatic cancer. I would add that you need to be prepared to deal with a ton of unknowns. The nature of the tumor and how things will progress can be somewhat of a mystery to everyone, doctors included. My dad's situation was very confusing and we got a ton of conflicting information from different doctors for months and months. My brother is a doctor himself and even he was baffled by it all. It can be very difficult. I'm sorry your family is going through this.

nanabanana06

My grandfather was just diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. They did some tests to see if he had the markers that allow him to take the pill form of chemo. He does not. So he has to do regular chemo. The chemo therapy is only supposed to prolong his life by another 1-5 years if he responds. If not then he could be gone within 6 months. This is my experience with it. It sucks. I really have no clue how they check for these things. My suggestion would be to do what your already doing and give lots of support.

starshineamator

So sorry to hear this. My father was diagnosed with stage 3 liver cancer a few years ago, and they too found a growth in his lung. They did a biopsy (after finding it on the scans) and it was inconclusive. They ended up doing a minor surgery to remove it and test it for cancer, because if it was cancerous and it had spread to the lungs, they weren't going to do the major liver surgery to remove the cancer there. We were lucky; it wasn't cancerous and they proceeded with the surgery and ended up removing over half his liver. Luckily, he has been cancer free since and doing really well. 

So in my experience, after scans, they biopsy it, then remove if the biopsy comes back inconclusive to determine the nature of the growth, and proceed from there. 

*big hugs*  

BriDaily

My mom was just diagnosed with Stage 4 pancreatic cancer before Thanksgiving. She also had a spot show up near her lungs. They suspect it was related more to the cancer spreading to her lymph system than her actual lungs. My mom started chemo the day after Christmas, she just had another scan yesterday so we are waiting to see what the results are and if the cancer has shrunk. 

I know my mom has been incredibly touched by the time so many people have spent with her - whether it is stopping by for tea, going with her to appointments, etc. She gets loads of cards in the mail. Some of our friends have been sending her a card weekly. She has gotten some pretty funny ones and many touching ones.

Just be there for your MIL as much as possible. Have her make a Bucket List and reach some of her crazy goals (my mom is going to go hang gliding). Keep us updated on how she is doing!

KateLouise

starshineamator:

So sorry to hear this. My father was diagnosed with stage 3 liver cancer a few years ago, and they too found a growth in his lung. They did a biopsy (after finding it on the scans) and it was inconclusive. They ended up doing a minor surgery to remove it and test it for cancer, because if it was cancerous and it had spread to the lungs, they weren't going to do the major liver surgery to remove the cancer there. We were lucky; it wasn't cancerous and they proceeded with the surgery and ended up removing over half his liver. Luckily, he has been cancer free since and doing really well. 

So in my experience, after scans, they biopsy it, then remove if the biopsy comes back inconclusive to determine the nature of the growth, and proceed from there. 

*big hugs*  

Thanks for all the feedback ladies. This story imparticular makes me feel a bit more hopeful.

I know, we simply can't know more until the appointment with the oncologist and even then it's going to be a slow process of treatments/scans/surgeries etc etc etc 

MIL lives by herself. Are people who undergo radiotherapy generally well enough to care for themselves? Should we be considering staying with her for a while/having her stay with us, or would dropping in regularly to help her out be suitable?

She has a sister who lives nearby, but she's quite elderly, so beyond that it's just us living close, although she has a strong network of friends. 

Becid24

My sister passed away 8 yrs ago from colon cancer at the age of 30. They can do tests to determine what is on the lung, I believe a PET scan can tell them if its got blood flow & more stuff. Very important that all the immediate family get checked ASAP and continue to get checked as your dr says. My sister had issues for a year before getting diagnosed & died after a 3.5 yr battle leaving behind 3 beautiful girls age 4, 6, & 8. 

KRZ9.24.06

beci24:

My sister passed away 8 yrs ago from colon cancer at the age of 30. They can do tests to determine what is on the lung, I believe a PET scan can tell them if its got blood flow & more stuff. Very important that all the immediate family get checked ASAP and continue to get checked as your dr says. My sister had issues for a year before getting diagnosed & died after a 3.5 yr battle leaving behind 3 beautiful girls age 4, 6, & 8. 

So terrible.   I just lost my sister this past year to bile duct cancer.  She was only 28.  Lost my dad in 99 to colon cancer.   It's such an insane disease.