What do people say to you?

LottaLattes

I literally have the same conversation over and over about my extra fraternal guys about how different they look. I am pretty good humored about it because getting irate doesn't change anything. But it made me curious, what things do people always say to you? I imagine ID twins have a whole separate conversation about getting them mixed up or whatever.

Them: Oh! Twins??
Me: Yep!
Them: How old? begin scrutinizing babies
Me: __ months
Them: Oh my! They don't look anything alike do they?
Me: Nope, no mixing them up here.
Them: Begin list of differences, hair color, eye color, size, skin tone
And then we talk about their neighbor's cousin who just had twins, etc.

You know, I went to Costco the other day without them and almost felt lonely that people weren't talking to me the whole time! Anyhow, what are the other conversations?

BabyCarryingVessel

Mine are fraternal, but they look similar, especially when wearing a hat or bow. Same eyes and same hair. People are always telling ME that they are identical, when I know they're not! This is pretty well the conversation I always have. I figure from now on if it's a stanger I can just nod and agree that they're identical. Who cares!

karo112

Did you see the video I posted the other day? That sums it up completely for me.

 

I HATE when people ask, "Oh, do twins run in your family?" 

MuseumMaven

My boys are identical really identical. Most people can't tell them apart. Yet I still have people say things like, "Wow, they're really close in age!". Um, yeah, 5 minutes apart. Occasionally I get, "they aren't twins, are they?" Nope, just two random babies I found that look exactly alike.

Breezy8407

hartigan09:

MuseumMaven:

"they aren't twins, are they?" Nope, just two random babies I found that look exactly alike.

This question from strangers always throws me. I'll be by myself with them in the DSNG, and people will literally yell from across the parking lot - "Are those twins?"

No stranger, I have all this twin baby gear and I'm taking two other people's kids, that just happen to be born on the same day, grocery shopping. 

I have yet to do it, but I keep threatening to say "No" the next time someone points and say "Are they twins?"  just to see the reaction

angelfire02

karo112:

Did you see the video I posted the other day? That sums it up completely for me.

 

I HATE when people ask, "Oh, do twins run in your family?" 

Ha ha I shared that video with a friend who has fraternal twins.  Cracked us both up, my FAVORITE was the tampon question.    Thank you for posting that!  I have ID boys and I am SO SICK of people saying "well I can see their heads/eyes/ears/brains/big left toes/ are different".  No you freaking can't.  I stare at them all day and I mix them up a million times a day.  Ugh.  But I do know what you mean about feeling weird when no one talks to you when you're alone!  

ShopperKristi

Breezy8407:

hartigan09:

MuseumMaven:

"they aren't twins, are they?" Nope, just two random babies I found that look exactly alike.

This question from strangers always throws me. I'll be by myself with them in the DSNG, and people will literally yell from across the parking lot - "Are those twins?"

No stranger, I have all this twin baby gear and I'm taking two other people's kids, that just happen to be born on the same day, grocery shopping. 

I have yet to do it, but I keep threatening to say "No" the next time someone points and say "Are they twins?"  just to see the reaction

 All of this!  It boggles my mind that the opening line is alway "twins?"  Ummmmm.... 

Rynleigh

If someone approaches and asks the "How old?!" small talk introduction, I now say, "3 week old all spontaneous fraternal twin boys!" just to get all that crap out of the way lol Not even to the one-month mark and I'm already tired of people stand around making conversation just because there are two babies. The questions will change a bit here in the next year, I'm sure - the boys just measured a whole pound apart today, and almost an inch taller. That means Simon is gaining at almost 1.5x the rate James is right now... Simon is the biggest eater/gainer of all four of my kids. Never had a baby who put away food like he does, before. 

leapgirl8

The main thing we hear over and over again is "Wow, he really looks like a little boy, and she really looks like a little girl." It sounds stupid, but it's true - he has a very manly little face, and she has very feminine features. I'm not surprised that this is the main thing people comment on.

I actually get a little more annoyed with other twin parents - they approach us more often, which I totally don't mind - obviously I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to commiserate, compare and chat with other parents of multiples. But I get tired of the "How far along/How much did they weigh/How long in the NICU" conversation. They're not newborns, I'm over all that stuff.  

MrsLouie10

I've come to accept playing the "101 Questions" game and stupid comments after getting told one of my frat boys was cuter than the other by a stranger. I'll take stupidity and curiosity any day over rudeness!!

CarissaA

My boys are fraternal, and it used to drive me crazy when I took them out.  They are 5 now, and I think the questions stopped when they were 3 or 4, but there is a pretty big size difference in my boys.  

 Don't worry it gets better! 

Two*True

My twins aren't here yet but I get:

"Do twins run in your family?"

and

"Are they natural?"

Twinsmakefour

TwoTrue:

My twins aren't here yet but I get:"Do twins run in your family?"and"Are they natural?"

I innocently asked "do twins run in your family?" And when she said no we did fertility treatments. I felt awful. I was younger and never thought of that as a possibility. I never asked that question again.

LottaLattes

Ha, just saw the video, so I guess my convo has been repeated a few times! You know, I kind of decided that I wouldn't get too upset about these conversations. It would be nice sometimes to just walk through a dang store and not stop every 10 feet, but it IS kind of neat to have twins, I couldn't imagine any different days now!

I will say, the lady who tried to have that conversation with me after cutting her cart in front of me with NO kids got to me, but that to me would just be common courtesy. Ugh.

ougrad1

LOL-I've just gotten to the point where I explain that they are simply brother and sister born at the same time and nothing more.  What else can you say?

 

s0ulchicken

We still don't take the girls out often, but after people get over the whole "OMG TWINS!" part, they want to talk about my life with twins.
"Do they keep you up much?" "No, not at all...just every 3 hours!"
"Can you tell them apart?" "Well since you can, if I can't then I'm screwed!"
Annnnd my favorite "Were you trying for twins?" "No, actually we were trying for puppies. God gave us babies instead."

SBBBE

I Heart The 80s:

So funny, and sounds so familiar. I once had someone ask me if they were twins. Then, of course, they asked if they were identical (they are boy/girl). THEN...she said, "were they born on the same day"? 

Sigh. She's a teacher too. 

I have gotten asked several times if my b/g twins are identical too.  Come on people! One has a penls and one has a vaglna!  

Jen0204

People ask - surprisingly often - four questions. Are they twins, are they identical, how do I tell them apart, and is DD1 a boy. The odd thing is that usually people ask all of those questions. I get asked if twins run in the family a lot too, and I get "I'm so sorry, that must be so hard!" pretty often, to which I usually reply that after the first 6 months it's actually nice having two because they play together so well.

BananaPancake

People ask a lot of dumb questions, but when you're exhausted and you really DO have your hands full, is there really a GOOD thing to say to a mom of so many? I love it when people stop me and say, "Wow, you are so lucky, what a beautiful family!" It happens so rarely and it means so much!

 I'd rather they ask me questions than mutter behind my back like SO many people do. All of the, "five kids? that's crazy I think she has twins omg i'd lose my mind" muttering I hear when we pass is enough to make me nuts! 

Mrs JillB

Our first is a redhead, like really red. My husband and I have brown hair, so it was kind of a surprise. People talk to us about it all the time. Like, if I go to target, at least 4 people want to talk about the redhead they know. Dh and I are so worried that we may never get out of shops now that we'll have identical twins as well. And god help us if they have red hair too!

macchiatto

LOL we have a similar experience as you, OP. Well, our boys have always looked very different to us but strangers would ask, "How can you tell them apart?!" until they were 9 or 10 months when their hair started coming in more. I had to bite my tongue not to say in a "duh" tone, "By looking at them." They always had different hair color, skin tone (it's more similar now that they're older), builds, and all their facial features were different.

But yeah, especially when they were 1+ it's been either "Are they twins?" or (looking puzzled since they're only 1/4" apart in height) "How far apart are they/how old are they?" and then when I confirm they're twins, I get, "Wow, they look so different!" or something along those lines. And then yeah, the story about whoever they know who has twins.

macchiatto

Oh, and I love how you use the "copy/paste" onesies on your twins who look nothing alike. When those first come out I always had people emailing it to me and saying "Oh you should get these for the boys" and I was like, 'You know they aren't identical, right?"

LottaLattes

macchiatto:

Oh, and I love how you use the "copy/paste" onesies on your twins who look nothing alike. ; When those first come out I always had people emailing it to me and saying "Oh you should get these for the boys" and I was like, 'You know they aren't identical, right?" ;

ha,those were a shower gift and we were geeky enough to still use them! I should update my pic, these guys really don't look alike at all. I imagine people will think they are lying about being twins, nevertheless brothers!

I also have a lot of conversations about having four boys and how we should try for another but we will just get another boy. People are funny. I am proud, looking back, about talking to a twin mom once and I just talked about how fun it was to have two boys which I only had the two then rather than fixating on the twin part of it.

megs2011

s0ulchicken:

We still don't take the girls out often, but after people get over the whole "OMG TWINS!" part, they want to talk about my life with twins. "Do they keep you up much?" "No, not at all...just every 3 hours!" "Can you tell them apart?" "Well since you can, if I can't then I'm screwed!" Annnnd my favorite "Were you trying for twins?" "No, actually we were trying for puppies. God gave us babies instead."

Bahaha I love it!

megs2011

socialmediamommy:

My girls are identical. Like, once in a while DH and I still mix them up identical. And very clearly little girls. But I swear, people always say "Oh twins! A boy and a girl?" when they see them. They could both be wearing all pink, tucked under hot pink blankets, and it still happens. I want to smack them!

OMG this drives me completely nuts! I always dress my girls very girly when we go out and I still get asked Boys?Girls?one of each?

Hmmm does the pink, pink and more pink not give it away? How about the fact that they are wearing dresses??

I'm definitely getting sick of the fifty million questions and being stopped all the time.. I can never get anything done when I go out with them. And the staring! You can see them looking. I took them with my friend into Walmart to pick up some stuff quick and I didn't want to get out the stroller. So we grabbed 2 shopping carts and put the seats into the big part of the cart (no worries, I didn't put them up top of the cart and people were just eyeing my kids.

macchiatto

LottaLattes:

macchiatto:

Oh, and I love how you use the "copy/paste" onesies on your twins who look nothing alike. ; When those first come out I always had people emailing it to me and saying "Oh you should get these for the boys" and I was like, 'You know they aren't identical, right?" ;

ha,those were a shower gift and we were geeky enough to still use them! I should update my pic, these guys really don't look alike at all. I imagine people will think they are lying about being twins, nevertheless brothers! I also have a lot of conversations about having four boys and how we should try for another but we will just get another boy. People are funny. I am proud, looking back, about talking to a twin mom once and I just talked about how fun it was to have two boys which I only had the two then rather than fixating on the twin part of it.

Yeah, we still would have used them too. And yes, I am all for updated siggy pics!
I have totally had people tell me, "They can't be twins; they don't look alike!" And I think they look like brothers, but not enough that most people would be able to pick them out as such in a room full of preschoolers.