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May 2012 Moms
joshandpanda
member
Open Letter Monday
joshandpanda
member
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Open Letter Monday
Dear Supervisor,
I am so freaking happy you are in Vegas for the next three days (although I am very jealous as well) but this only means that I will actually be doing my job, and you wont be doing it for me. Otherwise, whats the purpose of me being here?
Sincerely,
an actually happy employee for a Monday morning
Dear Self,
You really need to get better on your days off from the gym... how else is the number on the scale going to decrease? Going out for dinner Friday night, Saturday night, and Sunday night are not going to make this happen...
Sincerely,
You have a pretty large goal, you just need to put the fork down...
Dear DD;
Infants frequently need to have their diaper changed and have naps/sleep. This means that I actually DO have to lay you down on your back on occasion. I am not doing it to cause you bodily harm so there is no need to scream bloody murder the entire time. As soon as I pick you up you go right back to normal as though nothing has happened to you, meanwhile you are stressing me out and breaking my heart. Get over this phase quickly please.
Love Always;
Your mother who is now gun shy around you.
Dear Girl on Facebook.
Your child is sick and needs medicine. Maybe you should stop whining about the fact that you have no money and sell the guitar you bought last week. Too bad the tattoo you also got last week cannot be sold.
Sincerely,
Mom without guitar or tattoo, but who has medicine for her child.
Dear Best Friend:
I love you but you sound like a twit when you lecture me about having my child vaccinated because you suddenly think they cause cancer while you smoke a cigarette. It is equally annoying when you pressure me to wean my child as soon as I can but also lecture me on the "dangers of cows milk".
Sincerly,
Your side eyeing best friend
Oh my I could have written this. I dread changing A. She is good for two seconds and then screams like I'm killing her. How dare I make her hold still long enough to put clothing on. This morning I put her pants on backwards and left them that way because I was done with the screaming. Hang in there.
Do you not want me to have a better job? How many jobs have I applied for just in the past two weeks? Close to 15 I would say and still nothing? I'm starting to lose hope on ever starting a career. I graduated from college 2 yrs ago, I think it's time you cut me a break. Otherwise, what was the point in me even going?
Signed,
Someone ready for a full time, salaried job
DD,
I love you dearly but you must sleep more! If you don't sleep well at nap time during the day then you should sleep wonderfully at night, but you don't. You can't have terrible naps then go on to wake up 3-4 times a night still. I know your exhausted so just SLEEP.
Love,
Looking forward to more sleep, aka MOM
Dear Friend,
YOU SUCK! for leaving me here alone while you go to hawaii for a week...
sincerly your friend who now has no one to talk to but her DH and DD.
Dear MIL,
Thanks for taking 2 months to mail a package to me that I AM PAYING FOR. The only reason it still hasn't come to me is because you're trying to make a statement that you hate my guts. The feeling's mutual.
Also, thanks for inviting yourself on our trip. We will not be paying your way and unfortunately you'll have to get your own room. Don't even think about trying to take DD in your car because you are a crazy, road rage driver.
Sincerely,
You're-making-my-hair-fall-out
DS,
I truly appreciate your complete and utter patience as I deal with your sister. She is enjoying pushing my buttons and living up to the terrible two's. I am sorry that you get less attention, I am sure there will be a day where you will need me more, but for now it is her turn.
Love,
Your mother that is trying to do her best.
PS. Quit with the almost walking thing - I will put that push toy away if you don't quit walking around everywhere with it;)
DD,
Occasionally the answer is no, or wait a minute and yes you do have to go to bed and no you cannot push your brother because he is touching something you deem yours. While you can be angry about any and all of the above situations you may not hit me when one of them occurs.
Love,
Your mother who loves and hates this age