the baby and its daddy

jenniferw91

what are some different ways for the daddy to bond with the baby before the baby is born? and how soon should he start trying to bond?

ELauren88

I think it really all depends on what you're/they're comfortable with. I'm only 11w3d, but my DH already likes to kiss "both of us" good morning and good night. Just his sweet way of acknowledging baby and being happy. Sometimes it annoys the crap out of me, other times I love that he already cares so much.

My brother on the other hand, didn't really start until their doctor told them the baby could hear outside noises. Then he started talking to their baby and rubbing his girlfriends stomach. 

To each their own! But I wouldn't feel bad if DH never did anything to try and "bond". In my experience, most men feel unable to really do any bonding  until baby is actually out. 

jmb11688

My DH was lucky enough to get a 2 week paternity leave from work. I knew that I would be getting a lot of time with baby and that I would be the primary caretaker, so when the nurses in the hospital gave us all of our "lessons" (bathing baby, feeding baby, burping baby, etc.) I encouraged DH to go ahead and do because I, cough cough, "I learned best watching". DH was very nervous at first, but with him actually hands on and the nurse going over step by step and encouraging, he soon became veryyy and funnily confident. During his paternity leave, even if I knew how to do something, I'd play dumb. "Can you show me again how the nurse showed you?" It made him feel incredibly important, involved, and confident in his Daddy skills. My mom told me this trick and I believe strongly in it. It also helped his bonding with our son.

 : )

jmb11688

Sorry, saw the "before the baby is born" part after I posted. Either way, this is a good idea : )

kirbabe

During my first pregnancy, I would read key milestones in our son's development (he didn't read any of the books).  He didn't talk to my belly or anything, but I would push my belly into DH's back when we went to bed and let Elijah kick the crap out of him. 

chicsahm

Honestly DH didn't bond with DS until he was born and that took time too, esp because I EBF. It will be different for every guy.... let him decide and what he is comfortable with. DH would feel him move inside me but it didn't create a bond.... it's different for the guys then it is for us. So don't force anything.... it will happen in due time and when it is right for him.

Alisyncarliene

Honestly I'm wondering the same, having issues getting my baby's dad to bond

katiebenes

pushing him won't help if he's not ready. but if he wants to, share the baby's development with him... then once the ears grow, let him know to talk to the baby. the baby will learn voices 

MR.&Mrs

DH sings to my belly and massages my belly. Its cute and even though the baby can't hear DH yet. 

dalzien

Our doctor actually told him to start reading to the baby bump because it will help baby feel more comforted from DH when baby is born. This helps to reduce extended crying periods when I am not available to help. This was more than enough for him to start trying to get involved. DH HATES the sound of crying babies (who doesn't), but it makes him so stressed he sweats.