Thoughts on two under 2?

Mrs.RTH

This is a re-post from the August 2012 board. I figured it would be appropriate to ask here

I was originally thinking about TTC again in july 2014 to get #2. But, in the past few days I've been thinking maybe we should TTC this summer instead. If, say, we got pregnant this summer DS would be around 20 or 21 months when the baby was born. I know its really hard for the first few years, but I also know that once you get past that there are advantages to having two close in age (they generally like the same toys, outings, vacations, etc. and they're able to play together as little kids and keep each other entertained pretty well since developmentally they are pretty close). For those who have (or have had) two under the age of 2, what are your thoughts on the matter? I havent decided for sure, it's just something I've been considering and it would be nice to get opinions from those who are there or have been there. Is it not as hard as people think or am I crazy to consider it? If you could go back and do it over (whether it was planned or an accident) would you? Or would you have waited longer to have the second? Any thoughts or opinions from those who have been there would be appriciated!

VABride2008

Mine are 16 months apart to the day and I would do it all over again if my husband was on board.  Sure, there's days that are tough but I love having them so close in age.  I would like to start TTC again this July.  I'm the type of person that once we get over the "baby" stage, I don't want to start over again in 4 or 5 years.

kagl08

Mine are 13.5 months apart. It has been hard, but I love it!! The first 6 months were h3ll, the next 6 months were ok and the past 4 months I've really, really enjoyed. My DH and I say all the time how much we love this age gap. They are finally playing together, like all the same toys, are on the same schedule. It's literally like having twins right now.

If DH and I were going to have a 3rd (which we aren't) we would have tried for the same age gap.  

memali26

Mine are 19 months apart. I love it, I love them, I would not trade it for anything. They adore each other and I hope that they will always adore each other this way. If I had to go back and make the decision again knowing what I know now, I would absolutely still space them this way.

Will I do 2u2 again if we have #3? Nope. Not a chance. DD2 was a dream baby, so easy, but she has gotten needier the older she gets and I don't think I can do 2u2 again with her. We are undecided about having a third, but if we do they will be about 2.5, maybe even closer to 3 years, apart. 

etude de la vie

kagl08:

Mine are 13.5 months apart. It has been hard, but I love it!! The first 6 months were h3ll, the next 6 months were ok and the past 4 months I've really, really enjoyed. My DH and I say all the time how much we love this age gap. They are finally playing together, like all the same toys, are on the same schedule. It's literally like having twins right now.

If DH and I were going to have a 3rd (which we aren't) we would have tried for the same age gap.  

this was me exactly! It was really hard but I love it right now....same toys, same size clothing, same schedules.....exactly like twins except DS doesn't speak in 4-5 word sentences.  

blueraine00

Ours are 14 months apart and I love it! Some days are super hard, but the good definitely outweighs the bad. It's incredibly cute to see DD kiss her little brother and wipe his face when he spits up! Now that we are past 4 months, things are getting easier! 

kcisthebombdotcom

I think this is an accurate assessment (or it's been true in my experience). It's easy to plan outings with two kids who are close in age. They play with the same toys and constantly play with each other.

If I could go back in time I would do it the same way. Honestly I'd probably space them a little closer! I remember thinking when DS was 9 months that I wish I was having the baby now since he was at such an easy age. 6-18 months was the stage I found easiest in parenting and it was nice to bring home a newborn with an older child that wasn't so challenging yet.

landosmommy

Mine are 18 months apart, and it's wonderful so far. It's only been a month, but I can say that it's a lot easier than I thought it would be. I know that can (and will) change throughout the course of the next few years, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. We were ttc DD, it actually took us 9 months to conceive her, so we were trying to have them really close in age.

fairbl

Mine are 25 months apart, so not 2u2. We planned on having them closer, but it took me awhile to get pregnant the 2nd time. I love it! I don't find it hard. I think there are times that have been stressful, but that was before baby 2 came along too. For baby 3, i would love to have 2u2!

KissyFishyLips

Mine are 19.5 months apart and I love the age difference. DD1 is able to help out, can verbally communicate with me, and showed no jealousy when DD2 arrived like an older kid might. She doesn't remember when her sister wasn't around. They're already really close and show each other a lot of love. It's also helping to teach DD1 about sharing on a daily basis rather than just when we go to playgroup.

The difficulties are still there, of course. Running errands on my own can be tough because I have to carry (or wear) DD2 but still have to hold DD1's hand. It just makes doing things difficult. Like, when DD1 sees me holding DD2 if we're out in public, she sometimes makes a scene about wanting me to hold her, too (this is new, 6 months in). It's hard picking a tantruming toddler up off the floor when my hands are already full, lol.