Annoying comments from fertiles?

Ms H13

These have been much less frequent since getting pg, but there have been a few doosies lately.  Wondering if anyone else has gotten any stupid fertile comments since getting pg?  Do they still bother you as much as when you were ttc?

My stupid fertile comment of the day was when a coworker asked me if/when I thought DH and I would start trying for #3 - she knows I am pregnant with twins.  I told her we were just going to take one step at a time, but now when I pass her in the hallway a little voice in my head whispers 'CRAZY'!!

fabulouspinkmady

Good grief, can she let you have these babies first before thinking of more babies?!

My fave is when people who don't know I'm having 2 boys tell me "it would be perfect if you had one of each!"... Uh, I think 2 boys is perfect, so there! LOL

LnR70707

They never go away.  Brace yourself when you join your first moms group, even after years of reading nonsense on here it is always twice as astounding IRL to hear the idiocy that can come out of someone who is a parent.   They don't bother me as much in the knife in the side kind of way, but the urge to correct the stupid is just as strong....and sometimes I find polite ways to do it (like the mom who was spouting off about eating pineapple would help conceive a girl).

afsalinas

One of my bf's and I started ttc at the same time.  She, of course, got pg right away. When she had her baby, I went to go visit.  (Keep in mind, she knew I was dealing with IF).  As she was showing me the nursery another friend pointed out a framed picture of my bf and her H standing in front of the castle at Disney World.  Bf says, "when we ate at the castle Cinderella had us make a wish.  We both wished for a baby and it came true." This woman is 29 years old! I felt like banging my head against the wall and saying, "I've been doing it wrong all this time! Why am I wasting time and money on fertility treatments when all I had to do was make a wish!" 

I know I sound like a bitter Betty, but it was really obnoxious at the time.  

Jenny935

SIL keeps telling me that we will have to be "careful" because now that we're "not infertile anymore", #2 will pop out right away magically! Because that's how it works - it takes forever to get KU the first time, and then it's just easy. I guess my screwed up DNA and messed up eggs will be fixed. (Maybe I just need to go wish at the castle?!?!)

afsalinas

Jenny935:

SIL keeps telling me that we will have to be "careful" because now that we're "not infertile anymore", #2 will pop out right away magically! Because that's how it works - it takes forever to get KU the first time, and then it's just easy. I guess my screwed up DNA and messed up eggs will be fixed. (Maybe I just need to go wish at the castle?!?!)

 Bahahaha! This is awesome.  

phishgirl29

fabulouspinkmady:

Good grief, can she let you have these babies first before thinking of more babies?! My fave is when people who don't know I'm having 2 boys tell me "it would be perfect if you had one of each!"... Uh, I think 2 boys is perfect, so there! LOL

on the flip side of this, when coworkers see me who didn't know I was pregnant they say congrats and then say" I hope it's not twins!"  Jerks!  I tell the that it was twins but I lost one at 9.5 weeks.  That usually shuts them up and ends the conversation.  Thank heavens I work in a big building so running into people that don't know "our story" happens rarely!  People are stupid!

JBDamonM

I've gotten this..."oh you're due in April - which means you conceived in July. Must be a 50 Shades of Grey Baby"

No actually, as it turns out my husband and I could have all the hot sex we wanted and still not get pregnant. But I love the reminder.

I know this comment is not meant to be hurtful but it still irks me!

Oh and also - we had a few of DHs friends who when we told them we were pregnant instantly responded with "your boys can swim." Seeing as we are MFI - this stung a lot. Again, these people don't know of our struggles so I can't be mad, but I still find it annoying!  

Ms H13

phishgirl29:

fabulouspinkmady:

Good grief, can she let you have these babies first before thinking of more babies?! My fave is when people who don't know I'm having 2 boys tell me "it would be perfect if you had one of each!"... Uh, I think 2 boys is perfect, so there! LOL

on the flip side of this, when coworkers see me who didn't know I was pregnant they say congrats and then say" I hope it's not twins!"  Jerks!  I tell the that it was twins but I lost one at 9.5 weeks.  That usually shuts them up and ends the conversation.  Thank heavens I work in a big building so running into people that don't know "our story" happens rarely!  People are stupid!

 

What jerks!!  I send them a virtual throat punch.

fabulouspinkmady

phishgirl29:

fabulouspinkmady:

Good grief, can she let you have these babies first before thinking of more babies?! My fave is when people who don't know I'm having 2 boys tell me "it would be perfect if you had one of each!"... Uh, I think 2 boys is perfect, so there! LOL

on the flip side of this, when coworkers see me who didn't know I was pregnant they say congrats and then say" I hope it's not twins!"  Jerks!  I tell the that it was twins but I lost one at 9.5 weeks.  That usually shuts them up and ends the conversation.  Thank heavens I work in a big building so running into people that don't know "our story" happens rarely!  People are stupid!

I'm so sorry for your loss. People just don't get it... that is a dumb comment because a) they don't know when someone has gone through what you went through, and b) what's it to them if you're having twins or not? It's not like they are being asked to raise them!

On a funny note, I did have someone ask me today if I was about to go "any day now"... she didn't realize I was having twins, so it was kind of fun to tell her "no I still have at least 10 more weeks" and watch her eyes pop out lol

lisagab26

There have been several...but the comment that REALLY gets to me is that #2 will come very easily now that we've gotten pregnant with IVF.  It makes my stomach turn.  Don't make assumptions - you are not an RE and you clearly have no idea of the extent of our issues! Grrrr...

 I think part of it is that I feel like our struggle is being downplayed (but that's my own issue).  

KdgTeacher

Someone in my group of friends is due about 2 weeks before me with #3.  She has 2 gorgeous healthy boys and while waiting to find out what #3 was the number of comments along the lines of "Oh, I just don't what I'll do if I have ANOTHER boy."  "I can't handle 3 boys" etc made me bite holes in my cheeks.

THis is also the same person who has told all of us, on more than one occasion, that she hopes someone throws her a shower so she can get pink clothes and blankets.  Guess who won't be attending THAT little shindig?

Jezebell26

The comments still bother me. I think they always will. I just realized that some of my other friends are TTC and I still feel like the fragile infertile girl. I keep telling my friends to talk to me or come to me with any questions or if they want to talk and they just ignore me. Seriously, will I be the infertile girl my entire life? Like no one wants to talk TTC with me because of my history? Makes me feel so isolated, again, when I thought I was done with that. Try not to let the comments get to you and enjoy your pregnancy and babies!

Native+Girl

We told our small group class last Sunday that we were expecting and said we'd had fertility problems and it took us a very long time. One guy piped in saying his MIL calls his wife "fertile Myrtle" and how they had been trying for #3 for 6 whole months and were getting frustrated so they decided to hold off a few months so she wouldn't be due in the summer/August (which I am) and lo and behold, their last time trying, they got pregnant!

I said something along the lines of "we were trying for over 2 and a half years, saw a specialist and had to go through a lot of different treatments for 16 months so we really didn't care if we'd be due in the summer." I don't think it clicked in his head that "hey, you can't really compare your 6 months of trying for #3 to their situation," but I wasn't about to let it slide.