Please tell me it's no big deal

lizlemon2

We have a supervised/termination visit tomorrow with SW and bio mom.  Little J has a big bruise and cut right on his eye brow.  Poor little guy.  We are also seeing the previous foster parents after for late lunch.  I hope they will all be understanding that toddlers get bumps and bruises and not judge us for not caring for/supervising him properly.

I am worried the mother will be angry and say she could take better care of him.

Dr.Loretta

Honestly, it could go either way, depending on your relationship so far. I'm sure the foster parents will understand.

GL tomorrow.

CaptainSerious

I'm sure the social worker and the prior foster parents will all understand.  As for bio mom, I can't really say.  Has she been difficult in the past?  Is she trying to make a case that your home isn't a suitable placement?

The day after J came to live with us, he was walking up a ramp (without a railing)and misstepped off the edge.  He literally flipped in the air and hit his head on the slate ground.  It was moments before the social worker came to join us at his medical appointment, he was screaming his head off, and I was petrified he had a concussion.  The understood perfectly, and all was well

Foster1Mom

It depends on the mom but most people understand that little ones fall and get bruised and scratched.

I tell daycare I am shocked when the one year old comes home without a mark. One CW told us we don't worry about the small marks, we know those happen. 

elissaann26

I think anyone reasonable will understand.  But I think the question is if they are reasonable.  The prior foster parents and SW most likely will understand.  And I've seen BM's all over the spectrum of reasonable.  Just don't let their reaction deter you.  You are doing an amazing job with those boys!

GL today!  I know these good-bye visits can be very emotional for the kids, which means they could act out in all sorts of ways.  This definitely isn't a fun part of the process but it is definitely helpful in the long run. 

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IRR

GL Today!  Keep us posted.

lizlemon2

Update: Visit went as well as can be expected.  In regards to the cut, everyone basically said it was J being J (and it didn't swell and bruise like I thought it would, luckily).  I will update my blog about the visit later.

CaptainSerious

Glad to hear the cut wasn't a big issue!

I can only imagine how difficult these visits are.  You and J are in my thoughts!