Adoption

Green monster

I am being ridiculous. I know that. But I am seriously having a hard time.

My BIL just called to tell DH that he and his wife have decided to adopt from Uganda. I am happy for them, but I am super jealous that they'll probably have their child home long before we will since they are getting started now... and we still have to wait to qualify.

I am a bad person. :(

Our Adoption Blog & Fundraising Efforts

Heading to China in November 2014 to bring our son home!

Re: Green monster

  • You are not a bad person! I think your reaction is totally normal. Sending you good thoughts! ::hugs::
  • Jealousy is perfectly normal. When they're teenagers and this is all behind you, you'll look back and laugh.

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  • Nope. Totally normal!  I'm sorry.  I would be annoyed as well.  Dr.L had a good point though that when they are older it will all be well behind you.  

    TTC since March 2010, BFP #1 11.09.10, ectopic, m/c 12.14.10 (10w)
    Clomid + TI=BFN, IUIs 1-6= BFN
    Application for domestic adoption submitted 4/18/12, matched 8/12/12, DD born 10/31/12


     

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  • I don't think your a bad person at all!!! Adoption- no matter the route- isn't easy and we all have our ups and downs. I've been dealing with the green eyed monster a lot as I just learned that my cousin (due two weeks after we were with our son) is having a boy. It's hard.
    TTC since June 2010
    5 Angels

    Lilypie - (hlC0)
  • You're not a bad person. I get it.

    I'm sitting here dealing with the realization that two couples that I went to college with and were in the "popular crowd" in my dept have now joined the waiting list of families at our agency. I'm sitting here feeling like I'm re-living college life all over again trying to "Fit in." 

    I get it.

    :::FOLLOW MY HALF MARATHON TRAINING:::

    :::Our Adoption Journey:::

    Evan James was born 1/24/13 and matched with us 2/20/13. The LOVE OF MY LIFE!!!
  • I think the post the other day shows that there are a lot of people here who not only understand, but have shared this feeling at one point or another.  I'm sorry that you won't be the first to adopt in your family, but try to remember that this means another child is finding his/her family and your child will have a cousin who shares the experience of being adopted.  How cool is that?!?

    ETA:  And, you can't help your emotions, and emotions don't determine if you are a good or bad person.  It's what you do about how you feel that counts, and I have a feeling you will do everything in your power to be an awesome aunt when the time comes. 

  • The green monster has visited me as well. That's the wonderful thing about this forum. We can express how we feel and you know that people are going to say that they are feeling the same exact way. Keep the faith and good luck :)
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  • I am feeling much better about this today. Keeping my mind on te child who will be home with his/her new family soon is getting me through it! I am still crossing my fingers that we won't be too far behind them. :)

    Our Adoption Blog & Fundraising Efforts

    Heading to China in November 2014 to bring our son home!

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