April 2012 Moms
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Pets

I have been thinking about getting rid of our dog for a while now and I just kind of want some advice/ non biased opinions.

 We have a 4 year old lab who is extrememly high energy.  Before my pregnancy and even during most of it, that was ok because I was able to walk him daily and take him to the dog park about once a week.  However now that DD is here that is impossible.  I can't take him on a walk with her in the stroller b/c if we see another person/dog he goes crazy pulling.  I feel like all we do is yell at him to go lay down and recently he has been doing things he hasn't done in years (such as getting into the trash multiple times while we were gone). he also doesn't realize how big he is compared to DD and has stepped on her/knocked her over quit a few times. I have tried to talk to H about how this is an issue and he NEEDS exercise.  he always tells me he will walk him, play with him, pay more attention to him but that only lasts a day or two.  No long term commitment. But he INSISTS we keep him so DD grows up with a dog.

 DD and our dog are BFFs.  If she is crying all he has to do is walk by and that usually brings out a smile. And he is constantly trying to play with her or just laying next to her.   

I feel like he has a bad life and deserves to go to a family with time for him. 

Thoughts?

Re: Pets

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    I know how you feel!  We have a 7 year old lab who is slowing down but still has a lot of energy.  We also just had to put down our 7 1/2 year old Husky (he was just diagnosed with Lymphoma in October) in December, which was THE hardest thing, but now our lab doesn't have another dog to play with.  Luckily he does like to play catch so DH will take his out back and run him for a little a few times a week.

    Do you have anybody in the area that does dog-walking?  I don't know what the going rates are, but maybe if there's a teenager or something that wants a little extra cash, they might be willing to help.  You could try to find someone to walk him daily, or every other day, or whatever works for you guys.   

    You could also check in to doggie-day-cares.  You can drop him off in the a.m. and they can play and interact with other dogs all day, then DH could pick him up in the eve.

    Good luck! 

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    He needs some training to stop pulling. Have you tried a temp solution of a no pull harness or halti?

    His naughtiness is greatly due to bored and lack of exercise. When you see another dog on a walk, what do you do? A well trained dog won't act like that. I've raised a lot of labs and have worked through that.

    Can you hire a dog walker or send him to doggy daycare? A laser pointer in the fenced yard works well to burn off energy.

    What did you teach him about dd? He shouldn't be rampaging around the house. He and dd may bump sometimes, but you can teach him "slow" and "move" and "quiet", or call him to you and put him in a down rather than yelling at him to go lay in a corner.


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    Also, don't get this idea of a perfect family out there for your dog. There isn't one. People make do, and you can as well.


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    we did do training with him when he was much younger.  He knows commands and doesn't pull on walks unless we see other people/animals.  However unless he is exercised he doesn't care what you say.  We looked into doing another trainer before DD was born however it was way out of our price range.  We also live in an apartment so we do not have a yard.  I have taken him to doggie day care in the past but since starting a new job I can't take him to that one anymore.  I am going to look into finding another one or a dog walker. I guess the real issue is actually with my H helping out and exercising him. 

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    H got our dog when we were dating and he has become 'our' dog.  I love him however if H isn't willing to commit to exercising/training him, I can't do it all.  When I suggest we all go on a walk it's like I asked him to run a marathon. 
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    Please don't give him away, or "get rid" of him.  I feel like that is extremely irresponsible.  You are his owner,  you made the choice (as well as your DH) to own this animal and take care of it, you can't just give it to someone else to take care of when it's no longer convenient.  Hire a dog walker, get a pet gate, take him to obedience classes...you should find a way to make things work.  I feel really bad for your dog- you yell at him and tell him to lay down, because you don't want to deal with him.  But he is an animal, and part of your family.  If you didn't want the responsibility of dealing with a pet, you should not have taken one on. I'm sorry to come off harsh, but I absolutely believe you can and should make it work.  My animals are my family, I could never give them away no matter what hassles they gave me.
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    Sit your DH down and ask why he won't help. Let him know that his is NOT fair to the dog or you and that things MUST change. Why won't he help, consistently? Does he help in other areas?

    If he won't walk the dog, he needs to budget for a dog walker, or help in other ways so you can walk the dog. It isn't okay to slack off and do this to you.


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    I haven't read any of the other responses yet. It seems like its not the dog that is the issue, its your H. I understand that YOU cannot take him on regular walks now. We are in the same situation, we have a high energy dog who needs regular outings. I can't handle him and C on a walk by myself now BUT I do play with him (tug, throw balls in the back yard, etc.) when we are at home sans DH. DH knows that our dog needs to run or at least have a walk every day. So, he runs him almost every day/ he or I take dog for a walk when DH comes home from work.

    I'm sure you're getting flamed for this (even without reading pp). And its because of the simple stand by- when you brought that dog in to your home he became family, he isn't an until-we-have-a-baby dog. Make time and make sure your DH makes time for him. 

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    First I will say that it greatly saddens me to hear a supposedly loving dog owner talk so callously about "getting rid of" her dog. 

    With that said, many moms I know, myself included, are no strangers to undesirable behaviors in our dogs and how draining they become once we have a toddler in the house.

    First I would suggest leash walking skills. A halti, gentle leader, or EZ pull could do wonders for a dog who pulls. I also carry a bag of very tasty yummy walk-only treats for my dog in our stroller compartment. When an off leash dog comes charging to the edge of the invisible fence or whatnot, my dog, conditioned to the rustling sound of the plastic bag, immediately looks to me now and forgets about the offending dogs.

    And I have a dog who can reallllllllly hold her in in a challenge. This approach, for us, has been amazing.

    I think what you have here is a DH problem. You 2 need to be on the same page. It's simply not fair to you or to your dog that your DH insists on having the dog when he will do nothing to care for the dog- and yes, a nightly walk, romp in the yard, game of fetch IS part of care.

    Trash- move it under the sink, buy a cover, or baby gate the dog into a dog safe area while you are away.

    Knocking the baby over- well, this is just part of life. If not the dog, a child will be knocking her down, she'll run into stuff, she'll trip. It's just a part of life. So I would not worry about this one. However, my dog does know, "easy" if she's running or playing and she knows that means to freeze and chill out. I once taught a family having a problem with their dog running their kids down the game of freeze. But this works better with a couple of older kids to help. You all play outside, the ring leader yells FREEZE! and everyone stops. Eventually the dog does too, reward, continue. 

    I almost always walk the dog after afternoon nap (right now I'm not working, but when I was, we went either right before or right after dinner/before bath) OR if we were too pressed for time, DH or I would rock, paper, scissors it for who would do clean up/pick up/prep for the next day and who got to walk the dog after the baby was in bed. 

    Like I said, I do think what you have on your hands is a DH problem.

    Good luck. I hope you 2 can work this out. If you get rid of the dog, my gut tells me it will be something else after that.  

     

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    It's true that your life will be easier without the dog.  But it's not necessarily true that the dog will be better off someplace else.  I understand that your guilt is making you imagine another home in which your dog has tons of loving, attentive care, and the new owners never get annoyed/lazy with giving him the attention he needs...but that's neither guaranteed nor even likely.  What if you gave him away to a family who also realizes that he's too much for them to handle and in turn him away to someone who abused him, or just gave him up to a shelter?

     These are the things you need to be thinking about.  Then ask yourself if it's worth it to try to make it work out with your dog. 

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    I recommend a trash can with a locking lid.
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    After reading all these posts I realize you guys are right. Getting rid of the dog is not the answer and the problems the dog is causing are not the dogs fault. Sad DH and I have not had a chance to sit down and discuss this as he was working but I've decided I am going to get up before work and walk him in the mornings and hope DH will commit to walking him in the evenings.  Hopefully this helps our dog and my guilt.  If I can't stop the pulling with a halter, I'm going to try and cut some expenses so we can save up the $500-$700 the trainer we loved costs.

    Thanks for the idea!

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    imageKristenS09:

    After reading all these posts I realize you guys are right. Getting rid of the dog is not the answer and the problems the dog is causing are not the dogs fault. Sad DH and I have not had a chance to sit down and discuss this as he was working but I've decided I am going to get up before work and walk him in the mornings and hope DH will commit to walking him in the evenings.  Hopefully this helps our dog and my guilt.  If I can't stop the pulling with a halter, I'm going to try and cut some expenses so we can save up the $500-$700 the trainer we loved costs.

    Thanks for the idea!

    I just wanted to throw out there to not use a harness that clips on the dog's back- use a walk training device like the EZ Walk. Trust me :)

    My dog was a pulling machine like it was a job for her with a regular harness. A petsmart trainer clipped the hook to the chest and viola. No more pulling. I nearly hugged her for the tip.

     

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    I just want to add that we felt this exact same way a couple months ago.  Our dog was acting terrible.  Pretty much everything you mentioned, plus more.  And with TWO babies the bad behavior seemed more intense.

    We ended up surrendering her back to the rescue.  After the fact, we felt so shitty.  Like, was she extra terrible because of jealousy/wanting more attention?  Did we REAAAALLLLY give it a chance to iron out, or just get fed up and get rid of her?  

    Long story short, we realized we really wanted our kids to grow up with a dog & we probably took "the easy way out" by getting rid of her.  We asked for her back from the rescue.  She has been back for 2 months, and I'm glad.  She is work, but I really felt sick when she was gone. 

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    Are you serious?  Getting a dog is a lifetime commitment.  That's what happens when you get a pet.  The fact that you call it "getting rid of" is really disturbing to me. You don't just get rid of a pet.  

    Get this dog the help he needs.  Look into training at a local humane society.  

    If the dog pulls, training can help this issue.  It takes work, effort, and time.  

    I'm sorry, but I've adoped two perfectly good dogs from a shelter who were "gotten rid of" because of people who are too "busy" to take care of sweet animals that can't help it.

     

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    I wouldn't get rid of your dog, I would tell your husband that he needs to take the dog on more walks because you are unable to manage the dog and the baby's stroller at the same time. Or have yor husband stay home with the baby while you take the dog for a walk.  this makes me sad because he sounds like such a lovable dog, and your daughter really enjoys the dog

    Also consider getting some sort of baby pen/ or gate off a section of the house for the baby where the dog can't go, so you don't have to worry abou the dog accidently trampling the baby. I'm thinking about getting one of these:  https://www.ebay.com/itm/Baby-Playpen-Kids-8-Panel-or-4-Panel-Safety-Play-Center-Yard-Home-Indoor-Outdoor-/150984478148?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&var=&hash=item2327604dc4   to keep my daughter's play area safe from our dog.

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