How to get on a routine?

desertsun

DS's sleep is all over the place, and I keep hearing over and over that a schedule/routine would be helpful. But how do I make that happen when some nights he'll go to sleep at 7, and some nights he won't sleep until 9,10, 11 pm? Some nights he'll sleep around 5 hours straight, but not consistently.

He was in a good routine until he hit about 7 mos, and then he didn't want to go to sleep at his regular time, and it's been downhill since. 

He also really only wants to nap for about 45 minutes most of the time. I also keep hearing he should be napping for at least an hour.  

Give me some ideas, please! 

cmurphy09

How often does he sleep during the day and what are the hrs conclusive altogether? Do you let him sleep past 4pm?

unaveragejane

Gosh, at night I have to total opposite problem...I can't get DS to stay awake past 7:30! But like your LO, he often only naps for 30-45 minutes. I just altered his schedule this week so that he only takes 2 naps instead of 3, and it has helped with getting him to take longer naps.

If I were in your shoes, I would probably try setting a wake-up time, probably around 7:00.  I've just transitioned DS into staying awake 3 hours b/n naps, so I try to do the first nap around 10:00 unless he's acting really sleep before then. He'll usually sleep until about 11:30 now. His next nap starts around 2:30 or 3:00. Sometimes it's a good hour-long nap, and sometimes he still wakes up early and is cranky. By 6:45 we're getting PJ's on. He has his last bottle of the day, 2 stories (if he is not falling asleep already), bedtime prayers, a song, and lights out by 7:30 at the latest. (I would kind of like to get him to bed around 8:00 so he would sleep until 8:00 in the morning, but that's not happening yet. Since he is finally STTN, I am not going to complain!)

Also, FWIW we did the SleepEasy method of sleep training at 6 months old. It really made a huge difference in helping DS learn to put himself to sleep and eliminated his frequent night wake-ups.

desertsun

On a good night, he sleeps 10-12 hours at night -- sleeps 5 hours, is up to nurse, sleeps for another 5, will nurse again and go back down for another 2. And then will take 2-3 45 min naps during the day.

last night, he napped 2:30-4 pm, was sleepy again by 5 pm, and then only slept from 6:30-7:15, was up until 11, slept until 2:30ish, was up again for the day 6:30ish. Not sure what his naps have looked like today b/c I'm at work and he's with grandma. 

H and I are agreed that CIO does not work for our LO or for us. Last night, we tried staying by the crib, and he was alternately playing and fussing but at least not screaming or really crying. I don't want to habitually have to sit by his crib for 4 hours a night. For a couple of days or weeks, sure. But not long term. But I can't figure out how to "re-set" his body clock b/c he HAS no schedule right now and keeping him awake when he's super tired just makes things worse, and clearly, he fights sleep like a champ when he's taken the edge off with a bit of a nap.

Halp! 

 

desertsun

unaveragejane:

Gosh, at night I have to total opposite problem...I can't get DS to stay awake past 7:30! But like your LO, he often only naps for 30-45 minutes. I just altered his schedule this week so that he only takes 2 naps instead of 3, and it has helped with getting him to take longer naps.

If I were in your shoes, I would probably try setting a wake-up time, probably around 7:00.  I've just transitioned DS into staying awake 3 hours b/n naps, so I try to do the first nap around 10:00 unless he's acting really sleep before then. He'll usually sleep until about 11:30 now. His next nap starts around 2:30 or 3:00. Sometimes it's a good hour-long nap, and sometimes he still wakes up early and is cranky. By 6:45 we're getting PJ's on. He has his last bottle of the day, 2 stories (if he is not falling asleep already), bedtime prayers, a song, and lights out by 7:30 at the latest. (I would kind of like to get him to bed around 8:00 so he would sleep until 8:00 in the morning, but that's not happening yet. Since he is finally STTN, I am not going to complain!)

Also, FWIW we did the SleepEasy method of sleep training at 6 months old. It really made a huge difference in helping DS learn to put himself to sleep and eliminated his frequent night wake-ups.

 

Thanks for the response!

But when you say you "altered his schedule" or "transitioned" him to staying awake 3 hrs between naps, how specifically did you do that?

Sleep Easy has a CIO element, doesn't it? 

 

unaveragejane

desertsun:

unaveragejane:

Gosh, at night I have to total opposite problem...I can't get DS to stay awake past 7:30! But like your LO, he often only naps for 30-45 minutes. I just altered his schedule this week so that he only takes 2 naps instead of 3, and it has helped with getting him to take longer naps.

If I were in your shoes, I would probably try setting a wake-up time, probably around 7:00.  I've just transitioned DS into staying awake 3 hours b/n naps, so I try to do the first nap around 10:00 unless he's acting really sleep before then. He'll usually sleep until about 11:30 now. His next nap starts around 2:30 or 3:00. Sometimes it's a good hour-long nap, and sometimes he still wakes up early and is cranky. By 6:45 we're getting PJ's on. He has his last bottle of the day, 2 stories (if he is not falling asleep already), bedtime prayers, a song, and lights out by 7:30 at the latest. (I would kind of like to get him to bed around 8:00 so he would sleep until 8:00 in the morning, but that's not happening yet. Since he is finally STTN, I am not going to complain!)

Also, FWIW we did the SleepEasy method of sleep training at 6 months old. It really made a huge difference in helping DS learn to put himself to sleep and eliminated his frequent night wake-ups.

 

Thanks for the response!

But when you say you "altered his schedule" or "transitioned" him to staying awake 3 hrs between naps, how specifically did you do that?

Sleep Easy has a CIO element, doesn't it? 

 

With altering his schedule, I just started keeping him up a little bit longer in between naps. He used to only be able to stay awake and be happy for 2 hours. Lately he started fighting going down for naps, so I figured it might be time to lengthen his awake time. I intended to do it in 15 minute increments, but it really turned out to be more like 30 minute increments. For a few days, I would put him down about 2.5 hours after he got up from his last nap. Then one day I tried three hours. It is working great so far. In fact, today he napped for 1.5 hours this morning and 2 blissful hours this afternoon. It may not be that great tomorrow, but I'm hoping we're in a good groove now.

Yes, SleepEasy is considered a CIO approach. I tried the Baby Whisperer approach first (which is sort of similar) but it made DS madder if we stayed in the room while he was trying to learn to put himself to sleep. He did better with the short checks in SleepEasy. It's not for every parent or baby, but it worked well for us.

Also, just a side note that your night situation may look a little bit different from ours b/c of the BF aspect. I wasn't able to establish nursing with DS, so he is a FF baby. Your LO may still need MOTN feedings, but I do think there is hope that you don't have to sit with him for four hours every night.

mierasm1

I would drop any naps after 4 or 5. That helped us so much. Our LO used to never go to bed at the same time and it was always stressful and a gamble putting him to sleep, since we dropped to two naps a day it has been so much easier. We still go on his cues but since we dropped the late afternoon nap a month ago he has gone to bed every night at 7. Our routine is

640 wake up and plays I'm crib until 7:15

7:30 6oz bottle

9:00 solids

1030 or 11:00 6 oz bottle

Takes an hour nap between 9 and 10

12:00 solids

1:00 bottle

Takes an hour nap between 12 and 2

3:00 6 oz bottle

5:00 solids

6:00 6 oz bottle 

6:30 settle down, if overly tired we watch baby Einstein's, followed by a bath and 9 oz bottle and asleep every night by 8 

Around 7 months we got on a routine and we have all been so much happier. Stuff changes from time to time but this has been a good routine for us!

tbmadeamistake

I started C's routine by setting a bedtime routine.  Once we had that down she started going to sleep at the same time every night and that made the daytime schedule easier to set. 

Bedtime routine is dinner at 6:30, straight into the bath, quiet play time until she's tired and a bottle around 7:30 that puts her straight to sleep.  She knows her schedule now and if we put her on the floor after dinner, she'll crawl into the bathroom.  

Daytime now goes like this:

5:30am wakes up, 6-8 ounce bottle

8am: solids (2 containers purees)

9am: nap

11am: 6 ounce bottle

1pm: solids (2 containers purees)

2pm: nap

4pm: 6 ounce bottle

6:30pm: dinner, 2 containers solids

Obviously all of these times can be off by a half hour either direction, but it's a general outline.  To transition her into the stricter feeding schedule, I just started gently shifting her to longer times in between her feedings, or using puffs to tide her over until an actual feeding.  I also feed her regardless of whether or not she is acting hungry, and I just don't force the issue if she doesn't want to finish.  She's gotten great with this schedule!

DCMerged

For one week, keep a log of when he naps and when he goes to bed (and any night wakings) and when he wakes for the day. Keep track of when he eats as well. This will help you determine if there is some kind of pattern there you can start from.

We were all over the place too and now just starting to get on a routine. We started with a consistent awake time (between 6-7:00 am). He usually wants to take his first nap about 2 hours after he wakes. So now his first nap is around 9:00 a.m. He still wants to take three naps so the next one is mid-day and the third one late afternoon (around 4:00). I target 3-3.5 hours of total nap times with as much consitency in the start time as possible. Bed time is 8:00 p.m.

I was never a schedule person until about a couple weeks ago and now I do see the benefits of it. It helps them understand the rhythms of the day and what to expect.