I was torn between the idea of getting a doula and after speaking with one I wasn't sure I needed all of the services she was offering with her package. I finally decided that my husband is a good support system and can speak up for me because we have been through labor once befofre and that is good enough for me. I guess Im just wondering why people swear by them. I understand the pain management standpoint but some get epis anyway. Is there anything else that Im missing that would maybe make me rethink my decision??
Re: Why do most prefer a doula for VBAC?
Both times it helped to have someone who was familiar with hospital procedures and terminology. It also helped my DH to be able to take a break (though that was more true the first time, as I labored in the hospital a lot longer with DS1).
Oh, and I liked having someone I could call and talk about labor and birth with, especially at the end. My doula for DS2 was only with me for pushing, but I talked to her on the phone about labor a few times earlier that day (and she was the one who told DH it was definitely time to take me to the hospital, ha!).
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
Against it. It also helps that my doula is one of my best friends and she gets how badly I want this vbac. To each their own I think doulas are attractive to those who feel that the birthing process is partially mental, and also those who may be a lil on the crunchy side :
I think it definitely depends on your provider. I chose a midwife who would be with me throughout my labor. She prefers to act as the coach and provider.
If I had gone with another OB, who would have only checked in on me every 2 hours, I would have gotten a doula.
Also, if you have a DH who is prepared to fill the doula role....great. My DH was not. With our first birth, he just wanted the pain to stop. He did a lot of head petting and water fetching, but he didn't coach me at all. The second time around was better and he was more confident. But, I still needed a midwife and nurse who were on board with my VBAC plans.
This exactly. Our Doula was invaluable. DH was a wonderful support, but I wasn't always able to tell him what I wanted, or what would help me, and he didn't have a clue as to suggestions for different positions that would help during extreme back labor, or how to discuss options/thoughts with our midwife and the nurses. Plus, since I had to be induced the labor process took essentially 48hrs. He needed someone to step in and let him eat something/take a 15minute breather, use the bathroom. And when after 18hrs of intense back labor I needed the epidural DH just couldn't handle seeing me through that, so our doula helped me through that procedure. When we finally hit the end of the road and required a c-section I felt horrible that she couldn't be there with us. Her, DH & I had become quite a tight little team.
I had a ridiculously long labor. My doula kept me sane and on track. I would not have gotten through everything without her.
My H was great and was super supportive, but mostly because my doula helped him know what to do. It's her job, she's had training, she said all the right things and did all the right things. And my H just didn't have that sort of training... which is fine, but I feel like my doula helped him to be a better labor partner.
Besides, because of my long labor, my H was able to get sleep and be rested for my pushing stage when I really needed him to be alert. Having him be awake for that long wouldn't have done anyone any good.
If you don't want one, that's your choice, but for many women, they are priceless.
My husband and I feel we need that extra support system of someone who knows hospital protocols and can act as a little bird in our ear telling us standing up for what we want and questioning what they may be doing.
I also know how my husband reacts while I am in labor and he doesn't really know what to do or how to handle it so I want someone there who has experience helping me directly as well as helping my husband help me. We get along great with our doula and I know my husband will be very comfortable taking directions from her.
And, of course, for emotional support in helping me believe I can do this.