awful sil

smithwilson1219

So my sil is awful.  She has always been rude to me, for the last 8 years, even though I have been nice to her. She failed to acknowledge my pregnancy except by posting a link to pregnant women are smug on her blog, talks about dh and I like we are trash to our family and on her blog, and made us move out of a house that we had been in for four years ( the house was my husbands grandmother's, we took care of her until she moved to a nursing home ) so that she could live there.took pictures of my messy living room and my unclean gutters and put them on her blog (when D's was just born)..anyway..awful. And my mil keeps ds, and lately wants to spend time with my sil while keeping D's, which is 3 days sometimes more a week. Dh told her that ds couldn't be around my sil, and that he would find other babysitters if he found out she took him to her house again. BTW she didn't pick up her phone or tell us they were together, I found out from my fil..which she always tells when they go anywhere but wanted to keep it a secret. Were we wrong to tell her to stay away from my sil? I know she's doing a favor by keeping him? I feel conflicted.

biochembelle

I think you have a right to determine who your child spends time with. However, you and DH will have to decide which is more important to you, your MIL watching DS or your DS being kept away from SIL. If you really don't want DH around SIL, I would ask your DH have a face to face discussion with MIL. Be prepared for her to say that she can't watch LO anymore, in which case you will have to make other child care arrangements.

KatFCo

biochembelle:

I think you have a right to determine who your child spends time with. However, you and DH will have to decide which is more important to you, your MIL watching DS or your DS being kept away from SIL. If you really don't want DH around SIL, I would ask your DH have a face to face discussion with MIL. Be prepared for her to say that she can't watch LO anymore, in which case you will have to make other child care arrangements.

I agree with all of this. It sounds like your SIL is behaving very inappropriately and can't be trusted. What does your MIL say about your SIL's behavior?

smithwilson1219

Mil and sil are alike in a lot of way but mil likes babies. She brushes it off as "that's just ----- she's always been that way" and says that she will come around. Hello! Its been 8 years! Dh sat down with her last night and said that we didn't want ds around my sil, and my mil laughed at him and changed the subject, so he asked her if she wanted us to call another babysitter in daycare, she stared at him for like 10 secs and said no, obviously frustrated.  My relationship with her is superficial and a little awkward anyway now that sil is in town and she doesn't like me at all and they're really close, whereas we were close before...idk I just don't want to be overbearing, but also don't want ds  to end up on her blog or for her to be rude about him, not that he would know now, but he will when he gets older and I'd rather just nip it in the bud, but then again mil is keeping him for free sooo.  If sil was interested it would be  OK with me..